The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

Listen, I've been duped by "English-speaking" pizza places before.

Pages: 1 2 [3] 4   Go Down

Author Topic: floods in pakistan  (Read 8917 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Arachno-capitalist

  • Jacobean Fuckbot
  • Mom-Mom's Weepin' Eye
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 319
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 3967
  • Ostriches and I have a history. So I eat them.
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #30 on: August 20, 2010, 09:08:18 pm »
Hey Fanta, I have a mensa card and IHIS card, but my NRA card gets me hotel discounts
Logged
Guy at my watering hole: "Acap, why do you keep coming to Jack's?They just serve shitty burgers and happen to have beers on tap."
Acap: I was thirsty one day and I sat down. A year later, Jack's was built around me and thirst is a recurring thing.

AugustWest

  • Over Easy
  • Philosopher King
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 774
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 10549
  • Bulbous, also tapered.
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #31 on: August 20, 2010, 09:29:46 pm »
Quote from: Arachno-capitalist on August 20, 2010, 09:08:18 pm
Hey Fanta, I have a mensa card and IHIS card, but my NRA card gets me hotel discounts

So will an AARP card...
Logged
Infinitely vast, infinitely detailed.

Arachno-capitalist

  • Jacobean Fuckbot
  • Mom-Mom's Weepin' Eye
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 319
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 3967
  • Ostriches and I have a history. So I eat them.
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #32 on: August 20, 2010, 11:16:52 pm »
Quote from: AugustWest on August 20, 2010, 09:29:46 pm
So will an AARP card...
What is it like to be old? Do you need to write down notes so you know where your car keys are?
Logged
Guy at my watering hole: "Acap, why do you keep coming to Jack's?They just serve shitty burgers and happen to have beers on tap."
Acap: I was thirsty one day and I sat down. A year later, Jack's was built around me and thirst is a recurring thing.

Choop

  • Mod Squad
  • LAZARUS, Tasseled Loafer of the Powerful
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1010
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 4260
  • www dot at rick and morty dot com www
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #33 on: August 20, 2010, 11:32:13 pm »
30% off at wendy's
Logged
Nobody exists on purpose; nobody belongs anywhere; everybody's gonna die. Come watch TV?

greenkoolayd

  • VIP
  • Sanryobuki Artificial Liver
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 697
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 2889
  • i make passes at girls who wear glasses.
    • View Profile
    • mi facebook
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #34 on: August 21, 2010, 12:35:52 am »
Logged
"I could tell you the first rule of Spite Club, but I won’t."

AugustWest

  • Over Easy
  • Philosopher King
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 774
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 10549
  • Bulbous, also tapered.
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #35 on: August 21, 2010, 03:45:00 am »
Quote from: Arachno-capitalist on August 20, 2010, 11:16:52 pm
What is it like to be old? Do you need to write down notes so you know where your car keys are?

Nah, you just always leave 'em in the same place.
Logged
Infinitely vast, infinitely detailed.

jay-ell

  • Den Mother
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 407
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7869
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #36 on: August 21, 2010, 04:57:04 am »
Quote from: AugustWest on August 21, 2010, 03:45:00 am
Nah, you just always leave 'em in the same place.

Until your kids take them away...


...for safety.
Logged
"I always hear 'punch me in the face' when you're speaking. But it's usually subtext." -- Martin Freeman as John Watson

arkabee

  • VIP
  • -=Ray=-
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 153
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1280
  • i still hate the new forum software.
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #37 on: August 21, 2010, 06:59:26 pm »
Quote from: jay-ell on August 21, 2010, 04:57:04 am
Until your kids take them away...


...for safety.

due to punishments?
Logged
"God forbid I'd ever be separated from my Duran Duran for a single minute!"
-August West
"Maybe Hanson or the Jonas Brothers might finally lose their shit one day."
-Nabubrush

greenkoolayd

  • VIP
  • Sanryobuki Artificial Liver
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 697
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 2889
  • i make passes at girls who wear glasses.
    • View Profile
    • mi facebook
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #38 on: August 22, 2010, 05:46:31 am »
Quote from: AugustWest on August 21, 2010, 03:45:00 am
Nah, you just always leave 'em in the same place.

Logged
"I could tell you the first rule of Spite Club, but I won’t."

fanta

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: -32
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 128
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #39 on: August 22, 2010, 12:09:53 pm »
how about the model where it's a giant dildo nailed into the wall and the key ring is threaded through the tip of an actual condom.
Logged

Arachno-capitalist

  • Jacobean Fuckbot
  • Mom-Mom's Weepin' Eye
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 319
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 3967
  • Ostriches and I have a history. So I eat them.
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #40 on: August 22, 2010, 03:41:03 pm »
That sounds entirely useless. How do you get your keys if they are trapped in a condom? Are you seriously supposed to thread the key ring out of the hole in the condom every time you need your keys? An idea that dumb could only come from you, fanta.
Logged
Guy at my watering hole: "Acap, why do you keep coming to Jack's?They just serve shitty burgers and happen to have beers on tap."
Acap: I was thirsty one day and I sat down. A year later, Jack's was built around me and thirst is a recurring thing.

fanta

  • Chucklebot
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: -32
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 128
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #41 on: August 23, 2010, 06:34:37 am »
what?  Dude I thought my description was pretty clear and unambiguous.  You should give me more credit than that.  Here's a friggin' picture:

http://midconet.net/achewoodtest/dildo_keychain_holder/

As you can see, the condom can be conveniently rolled up when the keys are in use.  To store the keys, simply unroll the condom onto the dildo hanger. 

Pictured is the suction cup model.
Logged

jay-ell

  • Den Mother
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 407
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7869
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #42 on: August 23, 2010, 03:21:10 pm »
I like the thought that fanta made those pictures especially for us from things he had lying around the house.
Logged
"I always hear 'punch me in the face' when you're speaking. But it's usually subtext." -- Martin Freeman as John Watson

Arachno-capitalist

  • Jacobean Fuckbot
  • Mom-Mom's Weepin' Eye
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 319
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 3967
  • Ostriches and I have a history. So I eat them.
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #43 on: August 23, 2010, 09:32:36 pm »
Quote from: jay-ell on August 23, 2010, 03:21:10 pm
I like the thought that fanta made those pictures especially for us from things he had lying around the house.
hahahaha


Anyway, while Im convinced that it exists at least in your bathroom, I am not convinced of its functionality. How many times can a condom be unrolled and rerolled and still hold on to a dildo? If you ever made friends and they came to your house, do you have to explain why there is a dildo on your wall or would they make their own assumptions? When you are out in public do people think you like to have protected sex with your keys?
Logged
Guy at my watering hole: "Acap, why do you keep coming to Jack's?They just serve shitty burgers and happen to have beers on tap."
Acap: I was thirsty one day and I sat down. A year later, Jack's was built around me and thirst is a recurring thing.

Doc

  • Growing Cucumbers of Impressive Dimensions
  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1408
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5017
  • an emergency backup pug
    • View Profile
Re: floods in pakistan
« Reply #44 on: August 24, 2010, 08:01:05 am »
A more durable idea would be to have the dildo as a keychain and a fleshlight mounted on the wall to put it in. You could even make it one of those sleek, silver dildos so people don't necessarily think you have a stand-in c*ck on your keys.
Logged
Inev: 'A lot of things are ridiculous if you think about them long enough, you know?'
Pages: 1 2 [3] 4   Go Up
« previous next »