There is no way for me to see anything on the other side in a positive light
Seriously? Nothing? I can't imagine anyone in his right mind wanting to see the abortion rate
increase. It is one thing to be in favor of offering women choice, and other to be in favor of more abortions being performed. Does anybody really think that having an abortion is preferable to not having an unwanted pregnancy in the first place?
Aside from the consequences for the unborn child -- and before anyone tries, you will never convince me that a fetus is not a child -- most abortions bear terrible, life-long consequences for the mother. I know women who have had abortions and remain adamently pro-choice, yet they are still haunted by the physical and emotional ramifications, even decades later.
I know a woman who had a hysterectomy at the age of 25 because her "safe, legal" abortion at the age of 17 was so badly botched that she suffered eight years of intense pain before suffering a ruptured uterus, which nearly killed her. I know a woman who is struggling with infertility and will never be sure if it's because many years ago she was raped, got pregnant, and had an abortion. I know a woman who had an abortion because her abusive ex-fiance threatened to beat her until she miscarried, and now, happily married to someone else with three beautiful kids, she still grieves for the child she never knew.
All these women were victims of terrible circumstances. Certainly, Nabu, you must have sympathy for them. The pro-lifers are concerned for them, too. (Most of us.) We want to protect other women from being forced to make the same terrible decision -- to bear a child they can't or won't raise, or to destroy it.
Some of us miss the mark and focus on the end result of the decision these women have to make, and that's a disservice to both sides. But for most of us -- the silent majority, I think -- it's very much an issue of women's rights. Not the right to choose between two bad options, but the right never be asked to make that choice.
I'm not against women, I'm against those who would force women to be forever labeled a sinner or a saint based on what she does in her darkest moment. And that means I'm in favor of explicit, detailed, and pervasive sex education; universal access to a variety of birth control methods and instruction on how to use them (including the morning-after pill, which has gotten a terrible reputation among pro-lifers because the media doesn't understand science); complete access engaging in a national dialog about the problems involved in how rape is reported and prosecuted, and handled in the media.
If we have all these things, we won't need to criminalize abortion because it will only exist in rare, extreme cases like rape and maternal medical endangerment. But as long as we're locking horns over whether or not a fetus is or is not alive, the terrorists are winning and we're all at risk.
There's not such a gap between us that we can't talk about this like adults. But it's so emotional for so many people that we as a nation rarely get past the "life begins at conception/life begins at birth" argument. I'd like to think we can work at a higher level here.