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[AugustWest]

That I was exposing my daughter to a lifetime of being the butt of other musician's jokes as violist?

http://www.sunspot.net/features/bal-to.viola29dec29,0,1352136.story

It's not like she's a drummer or a bass player:

How do you get a drummer off your porch?

Pay him for the pizza.

What do you call a bass player who just broke up with his girlfriend?

Homeless

...Much less a banjo player...

What's the definition of the world's biggest optimist?

A banjo player with a pager.

Raising children is hard enough, dammit.  You could've helped me protect my darlin' baby from the vicious jibes of her fellow nerdy musicians!

[slink]

Look at it this way...
She's not going to get made fun of by fellow musicians about it 'til she's old and good at it and playing with proper musicians.
And in High School, everyone but her fellow musicians will make fun of her for it.

I played violin throughout school, and it would have been worse, had the assholes not all known me as a guitarrist, general dropout, and someone who made them laugh.

[jay-ell]

Yeah, I heard my share of Viola jokes in high school, but most of them came from the Cello section, so of course they had to be taken with a grain of salt.  

Everybody knows that viola jokes are all short so that Cellists can remember them.  

Violinists are usually too wrapped up in themselves to notice us "lower" instrumentalists (yuk yuk yuk).  

And Bassists -- well, don't get me started on them.  In middle and high school, just about anyone you find playing bass is just biding his time until Mom and Dad buy him a guitar.  (Exception: Jim Roach.  Most dedicated high-school bassist I ever knew, God love him.)

[jough]

Okay, since there are two connected at least peripherally with this board, I'll ask a question I've always wondered:

How does one *start* playing the viola?  Did you really want to play the violin but your school needed a viola player?  Did you say to yourself "Sure, I'd play the violin, but it's a little too small for me.  If only they made one about 1/3 larger"?

Because, let's face it, that middle register just doesn't have a lot going for it.

I'm reminded of a friend of mine who got roped into playing baritone horn in high school just because, well, someone had to, and that someone was NOT going to be me (I played trumpet in the marching band so that I could play guitar in the jazz band senior year, back when I had the intentions of being a music major in college, and nearly was).

[St_Zartan]

Did you say to yourself "Sure, I'd play the violin, but it's a little too small for me.  If only they made one about 1/3 larger"?

That is exactly it, or at least it was in my case. One day towards the beginning of sixth grade, they basically marched us around the building, talking to people who played various instruments etc. We got to hold them, try them out, listen to them being played, and all that, and I picked the viola because (a) it just seemed to fit me and (b) any musical instrument, I thought at the time, would be better than General Studies, which basically meant having to attend a different leper shareware version of classes like Materials Shop and Life Management Skills every six weeks. General Studies kids, it is worth noting, were the ones that were Most Likely To beat you up outside of a Circle K; you don't tend to really run with this crowd in Orchestra.

And, yeah, the orchestra teacher was a very nice woman who impressed upon me the school's need for violists. I was and am, sadly, a Complete Pushover for Nice people.

So in conclusion, The Civil War was caused by many factors.

Because, let's face it, that middle register just doesn't have a lot going for it.

You know, I can't recall what that damned thing sounded like to save my life, now, and I played it for three years. I do remember being rather fond of it, though, comparing it favorably to the violin. I hated the high notes unskilled violinists could and did produce on an appallingly regular basis.

[wombat]

Because, let's face it, that middle register just doesn't have a lot going for it.

I don't know about that.  I have never played in a modern orchestra but I have sung in choruses and played in other kinds of ensembles, and lots of times it is more fun to be on a part in the middle.  Altos suspect that sopranos are stupid - sopranos have to sing the melody because they're not smart enough to sing an inner line, aside from liking to call attention to themselves by singing the high notes.  Surely violists feel the same way about violins?

(Also: How many sopranos does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it in and another to pull the chair out from under her.)

[Carlos del Vaca]

What's the difference between a trombone player in a car, and a frog in a car?


The frog might be on its way to a gig.

[V-Adore]

(Also: How many sopranos does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it in and another to pull the chair out from under her.)

I've always heard this one as:
"How many sopranos does it take to screw in a light bulb? One -- she puts it in and the world revolves around her."

(I was, and am, a mezzo soprano, and I was always a little disappointed that nobody made jokes about us. We were just entirely left out.)

Even having drummed in school, I must say that my favorite musician-related joke remains:
Who's that guy standing over there with the musicians?
The drummer.

[wombat]

I've always heard this one as:
"How many sopranos does it take to screw in a light bulb? One -- she puts
it in and the world revolves around her."

Oh yeah, that's another good one.

Even having drummed in school, I must say that my favorite musician-related joke remains:
Who's that guy standing over there with the musicians?
The drummer.

Ever been in one of those situations where people keep referring to the instrumentalists as "the musicians" in contrast to "the singers"?  Good way to make the singers angry.

[jay-ell]

Oooh, here's a great orchestra/band joke:

What do you do with a drummer who's too dumb to keep time?  

Take away one of his drumsticks and make him a conductor.  

In response to Jough's question, I have to agree with Wombat on the middle register.  I actually wanted to play Cello, because I love the lower string tones, but I was too small to cart one around all the time (said my Mom, who desperately wanted me to play the violin).  I flat-out refused to take up violin because I didn't like the way it sounded, so we "compromised" on viola.  I was the only violist at my school until 6th grade, when I became one of two until my senior year of high school, when I quit playing.  I kind of liked being in a small section, too; seeing a glut of violinists just to the right of me kind of turned me off on the whole thing.  The pack mentality, and all.