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Author Topic: Nov 22, 2013 - Locked in the bathroom enjoying his free will for half an hour  (Read 2084 times)

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nephilim8

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« Last Edit: November 23, 2013, 07:14:55 am by nephilim8 »
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wombat

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I'd have gone with "So many die of angina due to anger at drive thru radio get order wrong" but it's probably too long.
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What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

nephilim8

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yeah this one had quite a few good titles it was hard to choose just one.
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Arachno-capitalist

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"Your dinner sucks because you're an asshole"

Holy craps, I lived that.

My friend's dad came home late one night with chinese food, probably after a 12 hour day of work and sitting in traffic. My friend's three sisters started mouthing off at him about how he got kung pao chicken instead of seasme chicken and forgot the egg roll, which meant he was a dumb old man who was purposefully screwing up dinner. He responded by throwing the take out containers at the wall and declaring "NO ONE EATS TONIGHT!" This was partly true, because the dogs really capitalized on all the food splashed around the kitchen.
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Guy at my watering hole: "Acap, why do you keep coming to Jack's?They just serve shitty burgers and happen to have beers on tap."
Acap: I was thirsty one day and I sat down. A year later, Jack's was built around me and thirst is a recurring thing.

Carlos del Vaca

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I feel for that dude.
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My friends call me the Mayor.
My enemies don't call me anything.  'Cuz they're all dead.
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