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So now we know who reads the News Box.  Hello Jaydub.

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Author Topic: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery  (Read 11254 times)

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spinn

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #15 on: January 31, 2014, 06:01:47 pm »

Or, no, the alternate someone on FB suggests: it's just that Pat's method of advertising is saving people from eating potatoes.

It's like a "trade in your phone for an upgrade" kind of promotion: "Turn in your shitty potato for a chia discount." And they're not actually looking at chia, they're commenting on the existence of chia elsewhere in the world. This still requires some creative parsing of Penny's line in panel 13, but whatevs.

Still confusing me why Pat would care about the quality of the potato he's about to fuck up but nevermind. I guess if he has to stoop to admit potatoes are a thing, at least the ones in the house should be ultra-organic.
« Last Edit: January 31, 2014, 06:09:05 pm by spinn »
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colmore

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #16 on: January 31, 2014, 06:12:12 pm »

I guess Onstad is forced by recent circumstances to reconsider his old love of Led Zeppelin and U2?  That's what I'm getting from all of this.
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wombat

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #17 on: January 31, 2014, 07:13:02 pm »


This whole new storyline has been too much concentrated Onstad.  Gotta dilute this shiz.

I think this analysis is right on the money.
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Carlos del Vaca

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #18 on: January 31, 2014, 08:25:25 pm »

Still confusing me why Pat would care about the quality of the potato he's about to fuck up but nevermind. I guess if he has to stoop to admit potatoes are a thing, at least the ones in the house should be ultra-organic.

Pat would care about the quality of the potato he's about to fuck up because he's a huge, self-righteous, condescending asshole. Simple as that.

I can't think of Pat without thinking "Dude! Don't wear a cape!" But cape-wearing Pat was actually sort of a nice person.
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theinevitable

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #19 on: January 31, 2014, 10:59:55 pm »

your activities are so poorly conveyed
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Agingbuffoon

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #20 on: February 02, 2014, 02:48:48 am »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=9fU7-R8nyJ8

This is what I imagine Pat sounding like and talking about at dinner parties.
« Last Edit: February 02, 2014, 03:30:03 am by Agingbuffoon »
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pmcd9

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #21 on: February 02, 2014, 05:31:11 am »

That whole putting your feet on a stool to simulate the squatting position is so much bullshit. I think we talked about that here. I never brought this up, but I thought about this one day when I was in a reflective mood and I realized that my forearms were on my knees as I looked down upon my reading material. By leaning forward in this way I was actually in a squatting position. I thought about it further and realized that putting my feet on a stool would be less like a squatting position than what I was doing naturally. It would be more like a bike riding posture.

Seeing how stupid and gullible the majority of people on Facebook seem to be I believe that whoever was selling those special stools that conveniently fit under the commode probably made millions. I guess I am starting to hate Facebook because it's throwing all of this stupid in my face everyday. I blame you guys for not posting more here where we're safe from all of that.

Looking back I think the first bellwether for me that we are a nation of morons is when we started paying for water.
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jaydub

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #22 on: February 02, 2014, 05:44:23 am »

Looking back I think the first bellwether for me that we are a nation of morons is when we started paying for water.
Just fought that skirmish again today when we were grocery shopping.  Fortunately reason prevailed for the moment. 
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pmcd9

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #23 on: February 02, 2014, 06:17:47 am »

That whole putting your feet on a stool to simulate the squatting position is so much bullshit. I think we talked about that here. I never brought this up, but I thought about this one day when I was in a reflective mood and I realized that my forearms were on my knees as I looked down upon my reading material. By leaning forward in this way I was actually in a squatting position. I thought about it further and realized that putting my feet on a stool would be less like a squatting position than what I was doing naturally. It would be more like a bike riding posture.

I think I probably never mentioned this because the whole 'the way modern man takes a shit is causing prostate cancer... Primitive humans never got cancer,' or whatever it was about was such hossshit that debunking it was probably a waste of time. So sorry, I guess for that waste of time.

Seeing how stupid and gullible the majority of people on Facebook seem to be I believe that whoever was selling those special stools that conveniently fit under the commode probably made millions. I guess I am starting to hate Facebook because it's throwing all of this stupid in my face everyday. I blame you guys for not posting more here where we're safe from all of that.

Sorry, I've been sick this week and have spent even more time on Facebook than usual.

PS, I found some Xanax in my medicine cabinet. Don't know where they came from, but they were in a bottle with my name on it. I have never taken a Xanax before. It is making me feel kinda mellow.

Goodnight.

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jaydub

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #24 on: February 02, 2014, 06:50:54 am »

That whole putting your feet on a stool to simulate the squatting position is so much bullshit. I think we talked about that here.
I'm thinking about putting stirrups and a saddle horn on mine now.  Giddap!
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wombat

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #25 on: February 02, 2014, 02:27:18 pm »

You know you can hide people from your Facebook feed, right? Probably even better than Xanax.
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Carlos del Vaca

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #26 on: February 02, 2014, 02:55:01 pm »

Primitive humans never got cancer,'

Primitive humans died of something more immediate before they could develop cancer.
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pmcd9

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #27 on: February 02, 2014, 07:01:44 pm »

You know you can hide people from your Facebook feed, right? Probably even better than Xanax.

Believe me I've done plenty of that, but If I hid everyone that posted ridiculous bullshit on Facebook there'd be very little left. The problem with that plan is even the people that post nonsense occasionally post something I want/need to see. No, a much better idea is for your figments to start posting more here. A couple of new folks were posting in this thread. Maybe we should throw them a party.

Hey Agingbuffoon, we'll call you Buffy, or Buff. Welcome. Edraid come on in, put on a party hat. Ianmalcolm2 you've been here for a little bit now, show the new guys around. You can be the captain of the bowling team. Colmore, Spinn, nice to see longtime members, infrequent posters make themselves known. Don't be strangers.
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KeithHernandez

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ianmalcolm2

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Re: Jan 31 2014 - I'm an owl jumper-cabled to a car battery
« Reply #29 on: February 03, 2014, 12:36:58 am »

I recently joined a bowling team, Paul, and let's just say that nothing I've done so far merits my promotion to such a position.

Except maybe naming the team "Pin & Tonics." The jury's still out as to whether that was a good idea.
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