Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[AugustWest]

What did the giraffe say when it ran into a concrete wall?
















Damn!

[andalucia]

I mean, I lasted through the abduction of Phillippe, so I can take anything.

Yeah, but those strips astounded me visually every day.  This... not so much.

[andalucia]

Good call, Asherdan.  
I recall the first time I heard that joke.  I was sitting in a friend's tiny smoky apartement and he put down his guitar, looked up thoughtfully, and recited what I thought then to be the most clever thing ever.  I was sorely disappointed a while later when I learned that he hadn't invented it, but it remains one of my faves.  I wish I knew jokes.

[jay-ell]

This made him a super-callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

 :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

::stands, cheers::

[CortJstr]

This kind of makes me wish I knew some good (read: bad) ones. I only know those we've all heard a million times.

Like a magician was walking down the street and he turned into a restaurant.

[sailor]

I'm normally one of those accused of fawning over anything he posts, but today gets a resounding "meh" from me.

Well, shit, I thought it was funny.
Back in high school, i had eaten some shrooms one day and frantically drew a diagram that explained the relationship between the physical and astral planes and how your postion on the astral plain between lives determined your place of birth and astrological sign in the next life.


I'm not kidding, I still have it.

[Formica]

Ray's starting to sound like a Cubic thinker crossed with some of those free energy people and "Bob."

Hook me up with some of that schnapps, yo.

[V-Adore]

Back in high school, i had eaten some shrooms one day and frantically drew a diagram that explained the relationship between the physical and astral planes and how your postion on the astral plain between lives determined your place of birth and astrological sign in the next life.

See, I had a friend in high school who believed something like that without shrooms being involved -- she and two of her friends were the "soul-daughters" of the goddess Kali and were better people because their souls were unique and not mass-produced like everyone else's. My friend was a guardian dragon on the Astral Plane as her power, apparently.

(I think she gave this up after six months or so, but I haven't asked her lately, so who knows?)

[AlohaDawg]

A dragon guardian and daughter of Kali was in NEBRASKA?

[V-Adore]

A dragon guardian and daughter of Kali was in NEBRASKA?

Yes. Three soul-daughters of Kali were in Nebraska, in fact, along with a young man they claimed to be a reincarnation of the Marquis de Sade. There may have been a causal relationship there, albeit not the one that they first imagined.

(Later, they explained to me that one of my past lives had been a Victorian-era alchemist. This struck me as possibly being the saddest thing.)

[andalucia]

Would you really really rather be a former dragon-guardian?  Turning stuff into other more valuable stuff isn't so shabby.

[V-Adore]

Would you really really rather be a former dragon-guardian?  Turning stuff into other more valuable stuff isn't so shabby.

Well, the image I have of a Victorian-era alchemist is this little guy in his lab, hunched over a primitive burner, energetically giving himself heavy-metal poisoning and God only knows what else -- while, meanwhile, guys like Mendeleev are actually doing chemistry.

Maybe I'm just bitter because, according to them, my two past lives were both alchemists and I still didn't manage that Philosopher's Stone shit.

[AugustWest]

Sometimes I am astounded by the lengths that people (myself included) will go to in order to avoid admitting that we have pathetically boring lives.

[Mantonio]

Whaddaya call a skunk that can fly?







A smellicopter!

[Gimpson]

What did the number 0 say to the number 8?


Nice Belt!