The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Achewood => Achewood => Topic started by: Bimmicus on November 07, 2006, 09:45:09 am
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http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=11072006 (http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=11072006)
Alternate thread titles: Too many to list.
This one was guffaws for me. Beef is the Jesus of bitter.
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Brings new meaning to "Food Porn"
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Onstad has really been into the erotic fiction, in various guises, of late.
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Onstad has really been into the erotic fiction, in various guises, of late.
In that case I think Onstand and I have been sippin' the same liquor. I've been accused of writting food porn no less than five times in the past two weeks.
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How did Ray know about my trowel fetish?
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I love Roast Beef.
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I'm kind of in love with the concept of erotic wine tasting, because I'm pretty sure that's the only way it could get more pretentious. Fantastic.
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I'm kind of in love with the concept of erotic wine tasting, because I'm pretty sure that's the only way it could get more pretentious. Fantastic.
You could do it in iambic pentameter. Oh, or a wine tasting that only allows people in based on their ZIP/area code.
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In the end, they marry. (http://charleysmuckles.blogspot.com/2005/05/i-dig-on-me-gewordstra-minner.html)
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A brown watermelon with nuts.
This is something that was in my head and I didn't know it until now.
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So is Beef drinking Mongolian wine?
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This comic strip was oddly appropriate for election day... but I'm having difficulty explaining the analogy clearly. Politics are definitely a fuzzy watermelon in dire need of neutering but... this, in and of itself, is not the entire story.
Perhaps it's just that... the realization that, though I believe I like the stated policies of this candidate or that candidate and voted for them as such, ultimately you must be possessed of profound mental issues to desire power and adulation so much that you're willing to shake the hands of thieves and have your character assassinated every hour on the television for four straight months.
No matter how much the politician talks like I believe, he or she is a crazy person willing to go through all the levels of hell to fill the hole in his or her heart with raw dripping power. I just voted to, like, give large amounts of power to thirty or so sociopaths because they agreed with me more than a different set of thirty sociopaths.
I suppose that's the analogy to... pulling out a glass of $1.50 Il Bocce Wine-Like-Substance from Big Lots and... trying to figure out a way that it actually has a "bold but smooth and almost zaftig finish as if you were in a hotel room ten years ago with Janeane Garafolo, a sex-swing and absolutely no clothes."
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You fucked Janeane Garafolo?
~Paul
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Why would you put such a women in that tableaux?
Why would you do such a thing?
Why?
[shuddering sobs trailing into the depths of the interweb]
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"I'm in a club."
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Why would you put such a women in that tableaux?
I dunno, I think I agree - she was quite the foxy minx if you like your women brainy & bitter. I wouldn't have kicked her out of bed. Might have made her go shooting with me though.
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You fucked Janeane Garafolo?
Nah. But ten years ago? Totally would'a.
I've always had a thing for bookishly-hot girls.
It's what allows me to enjoy Tina Fey despite the fact that she is disturbingly unfunny. With how many shows and movies she's been involved with, you'd figure that she'd get one laugh... just on accident. Y'know, you play the lotto enough, you're eventually gonna win ten bucks on three numbers, just by sheer odds.
There's a theory that... when you do paranormal testing, with the cards and whatnot, it's not just that some people have the power to "see" the cards way above the "average"... but there are some people whose power is not being to ever get it right. They call 'em psi-blind.
Tina Fey is funny-blind. It's a damn good thing for her she's so cute. As if Rachel Ray (pre-gettin'-all-whored-out) were a librarian.
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Ray saying "teh sekksy" has to be the low point of Achewood.
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In the end, they marry. (http://charleysmuckles.blogspot.com/2005/05/i-dig-on-me-gewordstra-minner.html)
Ooh, really good reference, I forgot about that blog entry. One wonders how long Ray has been in this club, and if that's where LN picked up his style.
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Sex swings: do people actually use these things? Discuss.
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Sex swings: do people actually use these things? Discuss.
Back in my day we only had a trapeze and we liked it! Damned glad to have it!
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Ray saying "teh sekksy" has to be the low point of Achewood.
Ray is pretty much the low point of Achewood anyway, and that's why we love him I guess.
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Ray is pretty much the low point of Achewood anyway, and that's why we love him I guess.
Todd?
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Todd is pretty low, the cussin', the illiteracy, the fact that his life is basically one big hunt's move. But i feel the true low in the comsmology of Achewood is Showbiz now he don't nearly cuss as much as Todd, but he is the personification of the black sheep in all our families. Plus he's related to Roast Beef, and together they have like a depressing synergistic effect that drains the very soul from a man.
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so, does it seem that something about the proportion of Ray's head to his body has changed? Maybe that isn't it. Something seems... off.
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so, does it seem that something about the proportion of Ray's head to his body has changed? Maybe that isn't it. Something seems... off.
Perhaps he is still in the process of gaining the weight he'd lost on his walk home from Mexico?
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The look on Ray's face in the final panel is excellent. Perfect.
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Sex swings: do people actually use these things? Discuss.
I haven't, but a friend of mine & her husband own one. Their verdict: fun the first couple of times, but generally not worth the effort.
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I haven't, but a friend of mine & her husband own one. Their verdict: fun the first couple of times, but generally not worth the effort.
Those must be some good friends if they (a) tell you about their sex swing; and (b) allow you to borrow it.
Of course, possibility (c) just occured to me ... that maybe all four of you...
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They are great friends, but we never borrowed the swing. I'm sure they wouldn't have minded if we'd asked, though.
They have a boy the same age as Little P. This (http://www.flickr.com/photos/pedro_picasso/100845516/) is a rather old photo, but here are the boys together.
I share a knit blog with the lady of the couple, she is a hot ex-goth who is a little bit bi. But -- quell those imaginations boys -- we've never gone that route. Her hubby would be down, as long as he got to participate, but Pedro and I both have strict no-sharing rules.
Also, for the record, and to bring this post (sort of) back on topic, Janeane Garafolo is teh sexxsy. Also, I really llike the idea of erotic wine tasting.
Next up: erotic reviews of non-erotic books.
"David McCullough's 1776 takes everything you thought you knew about the American Revolution and fucks it in the ass."