The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Sports & Leisure => Topic started by: Bobby Isosceles on August 26, 2008, 03:40:29 am
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Pat wouldn't eat Quorn because it uses egg whites as binder, but here's the verdict on "Turk'y":
No.
No, no, no, no, no.
It smells like turkey. Quite delicious. It looks like turkey breast, which makes me wonder at what texturing technology has gained from Cold War espionage.
It tastes about like what a completely dry turkey breast would taste like if it were made of the stems of mushrooms. The texture is even more so like that.
I don't understand what the vegulons are trying to do by faking meat. YOU CANNOT FAKE MEAT. Moreover, it is a disrespect to the deliciousness of vegetables, fungi, fruits and grains to try to force them to taste like meat. You don't see people contorting steak to taste like lettuce, do you?
I've no problem with vegetarianism or even vegulonism, but please -- apply Ricardo's Law of Comparative Advantage here, and stick to what you do best.
Prior to my experiment with the Quorn Turk'y, I had a salad consisting of spinach leaves, tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots and celery with a ginger miso dressing. It too was a vegulon dish. It was absolutely delicious. It did not need to pretend it was Turk'y or P'rk or Ant'lope or whatever.
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I too have never understood the desire to make vegetables into meat, it seems to betray a deep distaste for being a vegetarian by pretending you are not doing it.
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And just to extend the 'what the hell' of the conversation, why do the vegerinarians insist on 'meat substitutes' anyhow? Is it because you crave meat? Have some.
Is it because you want for some reason to appear to be eating meat? the best way to do that is to eat some meat.
There are so many great ingredients on this planet that aren't meat. Eat them. Quit inventing gross, fake food as a beard for your lifestyle. Destroy all the tempeh, seitan, and sculpted tofu hams, chickens, etc.
There are outstanding world cuisines that serve no meat or really small amounts of meat that usually aren't a requirement for the dish. Try Indian, Thai, and Chinese vegetarian recipes to find out that texturizing plant-derived proteins and torturing them into meat-like shapes really isn't necessary. Unless the need is psychological.
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And just to extend the 'what the hell' of the conversation, why do the vegerinarians insist on 'meat substitutes' anyhow? Is it because you crave meat? Have some.
Is it because you want for some reason to appear to be eating meat? the best way to do that is to eat some meat.
There are so many great ingredients on this planet that aren't meat. Eat them. Quit inventing gross, fake food as a beard for your lifestyle. Destroy all the tempeh, seitan, and sculpted tofu hams, chickens, etc.
There are outstanding world cuisines that serve no meat or really small amounts of meat that usually aren't a requirement for the dish. Try Indian, Thai, and Chinese vegetarian recipes to find out that texturizing plant-derived proteins and torturing them into meat-like shapes really isn't necessary. Unless the need is psychological.
I agree with this comment.
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Agreed, but I make an exception for Gardenburgers (which are available in your grocer's freezer and at Burger King, for the vegetarian on the go) and Chik Patties. The meat-based convenience foods these vegetarian alternatives are meant to replace bear so little resemblance to actual meat that nothing is lost in the translation.
I actually prefer Chik patties to chicken-based crisped meat pucks. Besides being lower in fat, the Parmesan Ranch flavor is to die for. Just don't cook them in the microwave -- the oven is infinitely better (bonus eco-points for using the toaster oven).
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I don't mind vegetarian food that a meaty substance so long as it doesn't try (and invariably fail) to taste like meat. I just had a veg dish that was like General Tso's had sex with Kung Pao. It was really good and the soy-product added bulk without trying to be Chik'n or Befe or whatever. I would totally have that again. Of course this was at a vegetarian restaurant, so presumably they know fake meat almost never works out.
Although I do have to admit that the yam shrimp that you can get a chinese places is pretty cool. The fact that they not only shape them like shrimp but even use pink dye to make they really look like shrimp is kind of impressive.
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I don't mind vegetarian food that a meaty substance so long as it doesn't try (and invariably fail) to taste like meat. I just had a veg dish that was like General Tso's had sex with Kung Pao. It was really good and the soy-product added bulk without trying to be Chik'n or Befe or whatever. I would totally have that again. Of course this was at a vegetarian restaurant, so presumably they know fake meat almost never works out.
Although I do have to admit that the yam shrimp that you can get a chinese places is pretty cool. The fact that they not only shape them like shrimp but even use pink dye to make they really look like shrimp is kind of impressive.
Was this at Sunflower? If so, I've had it, but again, would have been better with just tofu texture rather than extra processing.
Same with Surimi. I don't believe Surimi is crab. But i like it on its own merits.
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Destroy all the tempeh,
Tempeh is supposed to simulate meat? I had no idea. Learn something new every day.
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Tempeh is supposed to simulate meat? I had no idea. Learn something new every day.
That really says everything you need to know.
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Destroy all the tempeh, seitan, and sculpted tofu hams, chickens, etc.
I thought this meant destroy all the hams, etc made of tempeh, seitan, sculpted tofu. Tempeh is nasty indeed but on its own I don't think it's meant to be fake meat
I make an exception for Morningstar Farms breakfast sausage, I find them inexplicably appealing and very convenient. But I don't consider anything that processed and manufactured to be a healthy food.
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That really says everything you need to know.
I suppose it does, doesn't it. And I like tempeh.
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The one time I had seitan it was basically reminding me of what would happen if you got bread really wet, wrung it out, dried it and then stir-fried it.
The problem was that it was proposed in the dish as a "meat alternative". Now, that sentence reads to me as though someone handed me a warm, wet washcloth and told me it was a "pussy alternative".
As in, no.
Maybe if they said, this is seitan. It's made of wheat gluten and we use like you would use meat in some dishes, I could buy that. But not "It's just like meat! Try it!"
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Was this at Sunflower? If so, I've had it, but again, would have been better with just tofu texture rather than extra processing.
Same with Surimi. I don't believe Surimi is crab. But i like it on its own merits.
Yeah, it was Sunflower. It was like Sunflower’s Satisfaction or something. I've tried to like tofu, but I just can't deal with it. I've tried stir fries, smoothies, marinated and grilled, and it just always tastes bad.
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I do not crave meat, but there are some fake meat dishes that I find enjoyable and convenient. Morningstar buffalo chicken, for instance, and some sausage that comes in a tube that I can't remember the name of.
Veggie hot dogs are not bad when compared to non-kosher dogs, etc, and can be nice when grilling with meat eaters.
I also like the Morningstar black bean burgers.
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Look, I need something to put in my fuck*ng sandwiches.
I don't like fake meats. But damnit if something between two slices of bread isn't the dominate lunch paradigm.
If it's just lettuce in there, it becomes a salad I can hold in my hands.
P.S. A big "Fuck you" to restaurants with a garden burger as the sole vegetarian option. I never want to eat another of those in my life.
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I really like tofu. I think we might be eating... not really vegetarian, more like carbohydrate-atarian this year. Because cooking meat/buying meat/storing meat is more of a hassle.
Yesterday we ate so much macaroni and cheese. Hoo boy.
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Look, I need something to put in my fuck*ng sandwiches.
I don't like fake meats. But damnit if something between two slices of bread isn't the dominate lunch paradigm.
If it's just lettuce in there, it becomes a salad I can hold in my hands.
P.S. A big "Fuck you" to restaurants with a garden burger as the sole vegetarian option. I never want to eat another of those in my life.
Slice of tofu? Portabella mushroom? Avocado? Marmite?
I don't have an issue with non-animal-sources-of-protein-that-normally-come-from-animals, I just don't want the undue effort to try to fool people into thinking it's meat. Tofu is similar to cheese, sure, but that's because it's made in a similar fashion. Textured soy protein or mycoprotein texture loaf is an INTENTIONAL effort to say "Hey! This can be meat-like!"
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Now that my biology has run its course on this Quorn, I have to say: No. HELL NO. HELL NO!
Highlight if you want to see the grisly details. NOTE: You do not want to see the grisly details. Do not highlight.
As an omnivore with a very vegetable-heavy diet, I find a healthy mixture of soluble and insoluble fiber* to produce bulk and regularity.
Showbiz Kazenzakis would say -- "Hella plop-plops! Let's party!"
Whatever fiber is in Quorn Turk'y Loaf is an abomination and serves to maintain zero consistency. I thought the rocket-propelled soy deuces were hideous, but Lord, was I unprepared for Quorn. Quorn detritus has a cohesion best termed as "ropy", as if the Turk'y were attempting to rappel into the pool while Ahnold was on the top of this great big dung-rope, shouting "GET ON DA CHOPPAH!"
Quorn, you are Fired.
* banana and yeast smoothies, okra and lentil curries, spinach and celery based salads, whole-grain, self-baked barley and wheat bran bread, etc.
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Veggie hot dogs are not bad when compared to non-kosher dogs, etc, and can be nice when grilling with meat eaters.
Man, that is when I knew I should be a vegetarian. My mom bought me some veggie hot dogs and I just freaked out at the perceived grossness. Then I thought about all the hot dogs I had eaten up to then and realized, whatever in the fuck is in this, it is a ton better than whatever was in those hotdogs.
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Man, that is when I knew I should be a vegetarian. My mom bought me some veggie hot dogs and I just freaked out at the perceived grossness. Then I thought about all the hot dogs I had eaten up to then and realized, whatever in the fuck is in this, it is a ton better than whatever was in those hotdogs.
I like the Boca bratwurst clones, have you had those?
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details
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I told you you didn't want to know.
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Dude, I read it. I read it twice.
But my family talks about pooping at dinner. When we've gone out for dinner. At a place where t-shirts are "a little underdressed for a place like this."
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I liked the fake turkey (http://www.flickr.com/photos/pmcd9/2796676526/)