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[CortJstr]

I think the rasslin' wedding would be worse than that. All standing inside a ring, all showing the bride on the NuptialTron cutting a promo on the groom's old girlfriends, all pyro and theme music as the bride walks down the aisle, somebody getting smacked in the head with a STEEEEEL chair.

And if you had it Mexico you'd need a 6-sided ring and everybody wearing masks.

Someone. Quick. Marry me. This is the most awesome idea ever.

I would totally want to come out and climb up on the turnbuckle, resplendent in my feather-trimmed robe, name all embroidered across the back, and thrust the rings (which would have to weigh ten pounds each and have inset lacquered American flags) up into the air triumphantly. I want all the roles traditionally filled by children to be midgets, dressed in unitards with airbrushed-on tuxedo fronts. I want a Spanish Announce Buffet Table. Surely any woman would be proud and delighted to hear Her Man emit an ear-piercing WHOOOOOO instead of a wishy-washy "I do".

Now would that buffet be manned by the Spanish Announce Team or just Konnan? Would there be a "to be the man" speach?

You should go all out. Have Brother Love perform the ceremony. When they get to the "or forever hold your peace" part have a plant object just so you can cut him off by yelling, "it doesn't MATTER what you think!" then hit him with a Styles Clash, Ki Krusher, London Calling, or something. Even better, to signify your unity with you new bride have her help with a 3D.

[AugustWest]

How about a Barney wedding?

I love you
You love me
We're a Hap-pee fam uh lee!

[V-Adore]

I don't know, I find the sneering on that page a little too vitriolic, and a little on the classist side.

I do have to agree with you on some level. Once they got to the stripper-wedding stuff, it was vaguely funny, but the middle stretch read far too much as "let's mock vaguely unattractive people for daring to get married and take pictures while being vaguely unattractive!" for my taste.

At least one of my aunts' wedding pictures would fit on that page with no cognitive dissonance whatsoever.

[St_Zartan]

Now would that buffet be manned by the Spanish Announce Team or just Konnan? ... You should go all out. Have Brother Love perform the ceremony.

Ladies? Gentlemen? We have a Best Man.

Would there be a "to be the man" speech?

PUT IT IN THE BANK 'CAUSE IT'S AS GOOD AS GOLD, BABY
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[CortJstr]

Because of this thread I've spent my commutes trying to decide what my entrance music would be. I haven't come up with a good one yet.

Sadly my WWE-style Tron video would mostly feature me posting on Achewood and The Random Game which is pretty boring. Instead I'd have to opt for the effects-laden video that has virtually nothing to do with me. Like AMW or Raven.

[side_show]

I don't know, I find the sneering on that page a little too vitriolic, and a little on the classist side.

I do have to agree with you on some level. Once they got to the stripper-wedding stuff, it was vaguely funny, but the middle stretch read far too much as "let's mock vaguely unattractive people for daring to get married and take pictures while being vaguely unattractive!" for my taste.

At least one of my aunts' wedding pictures would fit on that page with no cognitive dissonance whatsoever.

Come on, the first picture of the "rockers" in all their teased and sprayed glory is awesome, mostly because you can tell they take themselves very, very seriously.  Anyway I agree that some of the others are kinda mean, but hell, I couldn't just post up a bunch of stripper pictures without a lead in that didn't make me seem like a total perv.

[wombat]

My sister's wedding pictures would probably fit too.

Let's face it, while people can't help being vaguely unattractive, it's totally their own fault if they voluntarily do things with their hair which are so likely to elicit derisive laughter.

[side_show]

Agreed.

[slink]

I'm thinking I gotta get me invited to a wedding soon.
I could go with theirs.

[V-Adore]

The pictures that are actually making fun of the mullets are reasonable, I suppose, as presumably one gets a mullet intentionally, but a few in the middle stretch seemed entirely focused on perceived dumpiness, which gave me pause.

I still want to know the context on the stripper wedding, though. WTF?

[side_show]

The pictures that are actually making fun of the mullets are reasonable, I suppose, as presumably one gets a mullet intentionally...

I actually asked my hairstylist about this as she was giving me a mohawk (sorry - no pictures, I hated it - way too much work to have it stand up and stay up. I grew it out right away).  She said that yes, sometimes people come in and actually ask for a mullet, and that other times they ask for it to be "short on top and long in the back" aka "the shorty-long back."

As someone who will shortly be a dumpy-maid of honour, I have to agree the dumpiness thing is a little unfair, but I can sure as hell guarantee I'll be laughing at my own picture!  (or possibly crying!)

[CortJstr]

I was telling my S.O. about this thread last night and when I mentioned that we mocked Ren Faire weddings she got a little mad at me. I'm starting to worry about her.

[side_show]

Wow, you're totally going to have loot and zither players at your wedding!

[Carlos del Vaca]

Do you mean "lute?"

Or do you actually mean he's going to give out loot, schwag, booty as wedding favors?

There must be a greater story somewhere behind the apparent stripper wedding, but I can't find it.

[AugustWest]

You know what I liked about the stripper wedding?  The guy with hisshirt off.    I mean, what mental process led him to believe that was warranted?