The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

@achewood "One of Your Shoes is By the Dog Food: A Tale of Things Not Worth Mentioning During Married Life," is out in September on Harper-Doubleday.

Pages: [1] 2   Go Down

Author Topic: ZING! -- December 22, 2004  (Read 5404 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

AugustWest

  • Over Easy
  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 774
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 10549
  • Bulbous, also tapered.
    • View Profile
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« on: December 22, 2004, 02:46:34 pm »
Ouch.  Ouch.  Ouch.

Good on you, Beef.  Further proof that there's a rapier wit beneath that sad sack exterior.
Logged
Infinitely vast, infinitely detailed.

Mantonio

  • Dr. Andretti
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 3
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 423
    • View Profile
Re: ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #1 on: December 22, 2004, 02:58:52 pm »
Quote from: "AugustWest"
Ouch.  Ouch.  Ouch.

Good on you, Beef.  Further proof that there's a rapier wit beneath that sad sack exterior.


I'd like to seem him try that out on Lyle. No, scratch that - Beef doesn't need to meet Trouble Man and No-No again.
Logged

Carlos del Vaca

  • The Mayor
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1316
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5007
  • Greetings from Banana Town
    • View Profile
    • bigfool.com
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #2 on: December 22, 2004, 03:01:31 pm »
"What has gotten into you two?"

The better part of a fifth of fig vodka, I'll reckon.
Logged
My friends call me the Mayor.
My enemies don't call me anything.  'Cuz they're all dead.

CortJstr

  • Mod Squad
  • Philippe is standing on it
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 338
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 9820
  • Which gives us AN EXCUSE TO DRINK!
    • View Profile
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #3 on: December 22, 2004, 03:03:58 pm »
That actually would make a pretty good book for Mr. Bear to write.

And I hope he waited until the end of the movie to get up and talk to them or some Spice viewers will be very angry and confused.
Logged

wombat

  • English-Speaking Pizza
  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 644
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12493
  • Yeah man, these are pugs, not some fuck*ng lolcat.
    • View Profile
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #4 on: December 22, 2004, 03:34:28 pm »
But, um, tigers don't have manes like that.  Surely they are thinking of lions.  Or are they all that tragically out of touch with their heritage?
Logged
What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #5 on: December 22, 2004, 03:40:55 pm »
Quote from: "wombat"
But, um, tigers don't have manes like that.  Surely they are thinking of lions.  Or are they all that tragically out of touch with their heritage?


Also, to be blunt about it, the ancestral cat from which genus Panthera (big cats) and genus Felis diverged did not have manes. Manes are something that's unique to lions, and even differs between subspecies of lion.  A domestic cat never had an ancestor with a mane.

Then again, it's a comic and who am I to complain.

The conversation is evidence that Ray and Beef are a little tippled on something though, or at least hyped on the fact that they are wearing manes. Perhaps the manes do bring out one's inner lion -- but one's inner lion is a bit of an asshole (picture the asshole lion voiced by Adam Carolla)

Today's Finnish music video is a little dance hit inspired by Rocky IV entitled Fire. I figured with all the nostalgia running rampant people would appreciate Rocky IV.

Also for reasons unexplainable here is a news story about an exploding Zamboni.
p.s. adam carolla is an asshole
Logged

PinkStainlessTail

  • Todd
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 0
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 269
    • View Profile
    • http://horsmanistan.blogspot.com/
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #6 on: December 22, 2004, 05:26:49 pm »
Is that 3 pound underwear £3 or 3 lbs? Or both?
Logged
"Plush. Rabid. Festering. Pulchritude. Eschew!"

"That may be the worst cheer ever."
-The University of Universal Understanding, S. Aldred

wombat

  • English-Speaking Pizza
  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 644
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12493
  • Yeah man, these are pugs, not some fuck*ng lolcat.
    • View Profile
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #7 on: December 22, 2004, 05:37:08 pm »
Quote from: "Bobby Isosceles"
Also, to be blunt about it, the ancestral cat from which genus Panthera (big cats) and genus Felis diverged did not have manes. Manes are something that's unique to lions, and even differs between subspecies of lion.  A domestic cat never had an ancestor with a mane.


Yeah, yeah, but see, that's the saddest thing.  They are trying to get in touch with their roots and they are so far from them that they have no idea what their roots are, like how I don't know what town in Italy my grandparents came from.  It all makes sense now.
Logged
What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

jough

  • God's Own Dick
  • Administrator
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 948
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6871
  • If you've got the time, we've got El Guapo.
    • View Profile
    • poetry archives
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #8 on: December 22, 2004, 06:17:59 pm »
Well, "I am your mom taking you to school in the car of pain" is probably the weirdest zinger I've heard this week.

Wasn't there a similar line in the "Dodgeball" movie?  Are we getting an inner look at Onstad's Netflix queue?
Logged

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #9 on: December 22, 2004, 06:42:34 pm »
Quote from: "wombat"
Quote from: "Bobby Isosceles"
Also, to be blunt about it, the ancestral cat from which genus Panthera (big cats) and genus Felis diverged did not have manes. Manes are something that's unique to lions, and even differs between subspecies of lion.  A domestic cat never had an ancestor with a mane.


Yeah, yeah, but see, that's the saddest thing.  They are trying to get in touch with their roots and they are so far from them that they have no idea what their roots are, like how I don't know what town in Italy my grandparents came from.  It all makes sense now.


A brilliant idea based on this involving Pat exiled from Achewood for shooting Beef, returning to the Serengeti, meeting and falling in love with a lioness named Apollonia, only to see her die tragically in a misfired assassination attempt involving a car starter, has formed.
Logged

AugustWest

  • Over Easy
  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 774
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 10549
  • Bulbous, also tapered.
    • View Profile
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #10 on: December 22, 2004, 07:27:32 pm »
Quote from: "Bobby Isosceles"
Today's Finnish music video is a little dance hit inspired by Rocky IV entitled Fire. I figured with all the nostalgia running rampant people would appreciate Rocky IV.


OK, how can you not like a song with a hook like,

"Your fiiiiiire,
gonna take you hiiiiigher,"

delivered utterly unironically.  How, I ask you, how?
Logged
Infinitely vast, infinitely detailed.

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #11 on: December 22, 2004, 07:31:26 pm »
Quote from: "AugustWest"
Quote from: "Bobby Isosceles"
Today's Finnish music video is a little dance hit inspired by Rocky IV entitled Fire. I figured with all the nostalgia running rampant people would appreciate Rocky IV.


OK, how can you not like a song with a hook like,

"Your fiiiiiire,
gonna take you hiiiiigher,"

delivered utterly unironically.  How, I ask you, how?


I absolutely love:

"I must break you!"

and then cut to the duelling turntables!
Logged

jough

  • God's Own Dick
  • Administrator
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 948
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6871
  • If you've got the time, we've got El Guapo.
    • View Profile
    • poetry archives
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #12 on: December 22, 2004, 07:56:25 pm »
"I must break you." is one of those wonderful matter of fact statements and one of my favourite lines from any film in the 80s.  It's saying "I don't WANT to break you, I don't NEED to break you, yet I MUST."
Logged

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #13 on: December 22, 2004, 08:01:47 pm »
Quote from: "jough"
"I must break you." is one of those wonderful matter of fact statements and one of my favourite lines from any film in the 80s.  It's saying "I don't WANT to break you, I don't NEED to break you, yet I MUST."


In Soviet Russia, must breaks YOU!
Logged

AugustWest

  • Over Easy
  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 774
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 10549
  • Bulbous, also tapered.
    • View Profile
ZING! -- December 22, 2004
« Reply #14 on: December 22, 2004, 08:21:42 pm »
Quote from: "Bobby Isosceles"
Quote from: "jough"
"I must break you." is one of those wonderful matter of fact statements and one of my favourite lines from any film in the 80s.  It's saying "I don't WANT to break you, I don't NEED to break you, yet I MUST."


In Soviet Russia, must breaks YOU!


Or if you're an elephant.
Logged
Infinitely vast, infinitely detailed.
Pages: [1] 2   Go Up
« previous next »