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[robot_roll_call]

Nori? 

Wasn't he one of Thorin Oakenshield's company?  Ori, Nori, Oin, Gloin, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Balin, Dwalin, Fili, Kili and that lot?

You forgot Doc. Everyone always forgets Doc.

[LCB]

I know of people like Pat, or at least are share the same holier-than-thou veganism and such. There was a little alternative vegan co-op grocery type deal once I went into a few times because they had a few items not stocked by the local bigger health food stores of the HealthFoodCoCorp type and I was in a alt-diet phase then. It was run by a cheerful but clueless lady who dressed in long drindal skirts and wore lots of "authentic" Native American jewelry, and her staff consisted of surly nose-ringed [local crappy alt-scene band] T-shirt sporting types and stuffy, prissy Pat types. The sort of people who practically have strokes if a customer mispronounces a tounge-twisting product name by one lousy vowel and feel the need to vehmently correct them.

The whole thing reminded me of comic shops or indie bookstores run by people who are really into comics or books but have little business sense. And like "we'll get by because we may not be SUITS with NO SOULS but we are pure of heart" bookstores and comic shops and little niche record shops I have known, in between the poor organization, the constant bickering and bad, money draining business choices on the part of the owners, the thing fell through in less than a year.

[yu-huang]

But now I want band-aid sized sheets of nori (...)

...Which leads to the image of band-aids actually *made of nori*. There might be a market niche for that, you know.

[Null]

Every time Pat uses the word "bestitutes," I want to hit him.

More than usual, I mean.

Yeah, who does Pat think he is, Forest J Ackerman?

[CortJstr]

Nori is that seaweed paper you see sushi rolls wrapped in. It's got sort of a slight, salty flavor and is exceptionally green.

Craveless nori... well, you got me. Wombat/AD/other Asian-food-hounds?

Isn't nori actually algea?

Thank you, Alton!

[Bobby Isosceles]

Isn't nori actually algea?

Thank you, Alton!

With regard to seaweed, the dividing line between "individual organism with various organs" and "colony of microscopic creatures, some specializing in different function" is a little blurred, not unlike that of the Man-O-War Jellygiraffe.

In other "beststitute" stories, a terrifying article from 1977 on how to make coffee substitutes using wheat, parsnips ("Parsnip Postum"!) and the like.

[Golfhaus]

This is what I think of when I heard the word Nori.



WARNING!!! Snot related link!

[Ben-San]

The hidden punctuation joke is that the gum is an entry of its own without a funny name. That, or its name is "Ape Grapes," with the comma being part of its name. I think it is just plain gum.

[wombat]

This is what I think of when I heard the word Nori.

WAAAH!  Oh, yucky yucky yucky.

No fair, how was I supposed to know this was a DO NOT CLICK situation? 

[AlohaDawg]

This is what I think of when I heard the word Nori.

I haven't seen any second-hand nori's on e-bay yet. I'll keep watching.

[pmcd9]

WARNING!!! Snot related link!

~Paul

[wombat]

Ooooo Paul it is a good thing I am not the kind of person who takes away someone's Dr Pepper, especially right after Baby Jesus's birthday.

But thank you for trying, AW.  Really it's not the snot so much as... ooh, I guess I didn't want breakfast this morning anyway.

[Bobby Isosceles]

Ris-Oat-Oh! The instant risotto beststitute that uses whole grain oat flour to allow organically grown, Cruelty-Free long grain rice to achieve the same level of creaminess as wetlands-destroying Arborio rice, in less time.

Dissi-Dent! The "revolutionary" new oral hygiene system. Used corncob fibers are used instead of synthetic bristles. A portion of all proceeds goes to fund freedom initiatives in China.

[Golfhaus]

Oh come on - it's not THAT bad. It's just water coming out the noses. And along with washing away the detritus that could turn INTO snot, it is also washing away... their sins. The best part is that the English page shows a woman and a (presumably) teenage boy, while the German site shows a man and a young girl. All are wearing purple. It's the happy Nori family!

Except for the boy, who kinda has a "I can't believe I have to put a picture of myself using Dad's stupid nose thing on the INTERNET" look on his face.

[Hobot]

Nori? 

Wasn't he one of Thorin Oakenshield's company?  Ori, Nori, Oin, Gloin, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Balin, Dwalin, Fili, Kili and that lot?

Nori is memorable because he was the Japanese one.