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@achewood I am composing a tone poem about eagles, lawnmowers, and Ted Nugent. It is composed only of the sounds of those things.

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Author Topic: Huntington Utah  (Read 35224 times)

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pmcd9

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Huntington Utah
« on: January 19, 2006, 06:12:19 am »
Not exactly Miami

Ok, here's the deal.  Remember when I said I wasn't going to Miami, but I was instead going to stay in Houston.  It appears that was a bit premature on my part.  No, I've been reassigned to smack dab in the middle of nowhere.  I just got the news today and I have been trying to put a good spin on this, but I ain't having much luck.

Most frightening statistic, population 2,131 (2000 census), Mormon Churches 4

They do have Jackie Wilson as their mayor so that's a plus.

~Paul
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #1 on: January 19, 2006, 06:13:46 am »
Dude, go to Miami instead.
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AugustWest

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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #2 on: January 19, 2006, 06:15:33 am »
Holy CRAP!

I thought I lived in the middle of nowhere.

Paul, I think you should look at this as a mission.  You have been sent to bring the FUNK to the people of Huntington Utah (and its environs).  You can do some good there.  They need the spirit of the moustache.

These things happen for a reason.
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AugustWest

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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #3 on: January 19, 2006, 06:21:35 am »
Um, it won't be far to Burning Man...

There are some hella cool National Parks nearby...

You won't have to worry about overcrowding...

You could live like HI and Ed McDonnough...

Or Napoleon Dynamite
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V-Adore

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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #4 on: January 19, 2006, 06:29:56 am »
National parks, man. National parks.

Alternately, Nevada.

Alternately alternately, can you go back to the Miami thing?
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #5 on: January 19, 2006, 06:43:32 am »
The one constant is change - what strikes me is, you know a lot of weird and funky people in Houston. I don't know how crazy you can get in a town with four LDS churches. I would have to think pretty hard about permanently moving there, but maybe you can store your stuff (like you were going to for Miami) and just take your bedroll and your one-hitter out there and see what the landscape looks like.

Me - I've got kids. I can't do that shit anymore - I envy you that can.
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #6 on: January 19, 2006, 12:44:43 pm »
I've lived in Utah on and off for 8 years, and I've never heard of Huntington.  It's over 3 (according to Google Maps, so you can probably shave about 1/2 hour from that) hours from Salt Lake, and it looks like you are about the same distance from Vegas than I am!

Watch out for the polygamists.  I'm serious when I say this.
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #7 on: January 19, 2006, 01:31:04 pm »
I only stayed in Utah for like a month when I was doing contracting work.  I would describe it as "fuck*ng Gorgeous, but full of creepy mormons."

I wish you luck good sir.
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #8 on: January 19, 2006, 01:37:02 pm »
I am so, so sorry.  Seriously though, is Miami still on the table?

I just think that you're too big for Huntington - what would we get?  Pictures of you at LDS church (which they wouldn't let you into anyway)?  I don't think so.  It's time to RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE and go to MIAMI or SOMEWHERE ELSE!

Or so I think.
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #9 on: January 19, 2006, 02:10:23 pm »
So what you're saying is that we won't be getting any more pictures of female punk santas in giraffenets.
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #10 on: January 19, 2006, 02:25:31 pm »
Quote from: CortJstr on January 19, 2006, 02:10:23 pm
So what you're saying is that we won't be getting any more pictures of female punk santas in giraffenets.

Oh NO.

Miami, Paul.  Surely they'd be thrilled to hear you'd changed your mind?
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #11 on: January 19, 2006, 04:42:45 pm »
Paul and Mormons.

I love it!

It's "Footloose Part II."

No, really though - for the love of god, go to Miami, as long as it's not Miami, Manitoba , where my SO is from, population 400+.  Then again, if you move to Miami, MB we can party.  But there are no jobs in Miami, MB.  None.

When it comes to Miami, FL, when my SO says he's from Miami, people get all excited, then he adds "Manitoba" and they're all disapointed.  So go, people here thing it's sooo cool.
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #12 on: January 19, 2006, 05:39:47 pm »
What the hell kind of work do you do that someone is needed in a place like that?
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #13 on: January 19, 2006, 08:48:50 pm »
Do they even have the Internet in a place like that?
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Re: Huntington Utah
« Reply #14 on: January 20, 2006, 03:00:15 am »
It's probably beautiful there.

And Vegas, as already mentioned, is an easy drive.

Assuming you can get real internet and UPS, nothing will be out of your reach.

You can probably find enough bored people to go make dozens of cars spit fire.

It isn't in goddamn Florida.

Of course, I spent part of last week in Eclectic, AL, and totally peeled out as soon as I could...
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