Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

Did you know...
that the best way to sound like a noob here is to ask what the Tiny Cans of Dr. Pepper are about?

Pages: 1 [2] 3   Go Down

Author Topic: I have quit  (Read 7443 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Mite

  • Motel 6 Kind of Girl
  • King of the Make-Outs
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 6
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 584
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #15 on: April 28, 2006, 10:52:54 am »

Mite: Is it merely a coincidence then that the cat in your avatar looks drugged?

Some would say there are no such thing as coincidences. I am not one of them, though. I chose him out of thousands at cute overload for exactly that reason.

"Dude, why did you turn on the light? Look - I just cannot deal with you now"

Though I might change it soon to our new kitten! (pictures of me making faces at him are beneath the glowing pickle). His name at the shelter was Filipe, but we just couldn't take ourselves seriously calling a kitten Filipe. So we moved him from Spain to France, and now he's Phillipe! Which, for some reason, is a perfectly reasonable cat name.
Logged
I'm no longer a Bankhead teacher, but I'll still take your cookies.

wombat

  • English-Speaking Pizza
  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 644
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12493
  • Yeah man, these are pugs, not some fuck*ng lolcat.
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #16 on: April 28, 2006, 11:14:31 am »

No, use the glowing pickle!
Logged
What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

Mite

  • Motel 6 Kind of Girl
  • King of the Make-Outs
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 6
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 584
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #17 on: April 28, 2006, 11:17:57 am »

The glowing pickle is cool (I made that particular rig for when I got to go on the local morning news show a couple weeks ago), but it's not cute and fuzzy. And dammit, I need regular doses of cute and fuzzy when I'm on the internet.
Logged
I'm no longer a Bankhead teacher, but I'll still take your cookies.

wombat

  • English-Speaking Pizza
  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 644
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12493
  • Yeah man, these are pugs, not some fuck*ng lolcat.
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #18 on: April 28, 2006, 12:38:16 pm »

PICKLE!
Logged
What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

misterqueue

  • Sick Fuck
  • VIP
  • R I S O T T O ?
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 25
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 2011
  • I can do anything I want. And so can you.
    • View Profile
    • A Reason for Diseasin'
Re: I have quit
« Reply #19 on: April 28, 2006, 01:18:01 pm »



Well... I guess because meditating won't leave you in the middle of the street wearing nothing but a pair of olive colored briefs, covered in blood  from tearing the rear view mirror off a van and crushing it with your hands.


Some of the best parties I've been to ended up that way.  Well, i guess it wasn't really a party.  It was really just me and a bunch of talking glass bottles.

But dammit, it felt like a party.
Logged
So it's satire, is it?  Well that changes everything!

Lockjaw is serious times.

pmcd9

  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #20 on: April 28, 2006, 01:45:39 pm »

Well... I guess because meditating won't leave you in the middle of the street wearing nothing but a pair of olive colored briefs, covered in blood  from tearing the rear view mirror off a van and crushing it with your hands.

Enough with the snippets, out with it, the whole story please.

~Paul
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

side_show

  • Sweet Fancy Moses
  • Mod Squad
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 501
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 6487
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #21 on: April 28, 2006, 02:39:36 pm »

*****_god: It's been over a year for me, and I was just recently looking back over said year, and I am amazed!  It has been the most productive year ever: we got a house, my play got picked up for production, I've figured out a lot of my personal issues... It's good.  I wont deny that I still miss it sometimes, but man, oh, man - getting high is so shockingly unnessisary.  Give it a couple months and you'll be fine, and also will have more money.
Logged
Abuse of power comes as no surprise.

FlipConstantine

  • Todd
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 20
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 322
  • In my hood homeboys state the obvious.
    • View Profile
    • Mac Fag Confidential
Re: I have quit
« Reply #22 on: April 28, 2006, 02:47:05 pm »

Some would say there are no such thing as coincidences. I am not one of them, though. I chose him out of thousands at cute overload for exactly that reason.

"Dude, why did you turn on the light? Look - I just cannot deal with you now"

Man cuteoverload is possibly the best site on the internet.  You know what makes it better though?

DRUGS

Just kidding.
Logged
Everyday I'm hustlin.

V-Adore

  • Guest
Re: I have quit
« Reply #23 on: April 28, 2006, 03:16:25 pm »

Wow, Philippe is very dear and wee. Be careful! Be sure not to frighten or break him!
Logged

robot_god

  • roast beef (the middle cat)
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 74
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1195
  • Oh my gosh, dude.
    • View Profile
    • ALP Myspace Site
Re: I have quit
« Reply #24 on: April 28, 2006, 03:26:17 pm »

Alright, sure, for you Paul.

A buddy of mine picked up what were probably the most potent shrooms of all time.  I ate an eighth of them and was shrooming pretty hard.  Very hard, actually.  Another buddy hadn't ate any so he put together a cocktail of broken up shrooms and trees and started packing my old acrylic bong.  I hit it many times, and from this point I have to rely on other people's stories.

I stood up and threw the bong, spinning through the air, towards the table, dousing a bunch of dudes that were playing cards with bongwater.  This is going on in my basement which is pretty dingy.  It's not furnished, and the floor is concrete and pretty dusty.  The corners are basically full of dirt.  I jumped (more of throwing one's self) over this piece of excercise equipment landing in this filthy pile of dirt in the corner.  In my mind, I was basically rising to the forefront of humanity, becoming the mind expanding consciousness more quickly than any other living thing on the planet.  Time was slowing down, and I was prepared for it to come to a halt, for eternity, because the places I was reaching to were the final place that any mind could possibly reach.  A few seconds later (seemed like about 5 minutes later) my mind orgasmed.  That is hard to explain.  Well back in the fake world, I think people tried helping me up and this is probably around the time I started getting loud.  I dunno how long this went on, but I spent alot of time screaming and being pinned down to the ground by five people.  Some dudes girlfriend thought that the foolproof cure would be to pour milk down my throat.  ???  My friends are bigger morons then I thought for going through with that.  I think I was gagged with a wet towel for awhile, too.  Obviously, the restraints only made me more agitated.  I hear I was doing pretty well fighting against five people holding me down.  Nice.

Well anyway, eventually someone put on some classical music on a radio and I was very much soothed.  I used to play cello in an orchestra, classical music was my favorite music to listen to while hallucinating.  So I was sat down in a chair and was pretty much calm.  I was talking about myself as if I had died.  It was basically my subconsious going through it's death/rebirth routine, because it believed the rest of my brain was dead.  The same idiot girl had a new bright idea to bring me outside and put me in my car to muffle my screaming, but at this point, I was no longer screaming. ??? So I was lifted out of the chair and led outside and two good buddies accompanied me.  I felt like I was walking along a fixed path although I was walking on my own.  The haziness of the steetlights at night and the linear nature of my fixed path led my mind to believe that this was some kind of a dream world.  Kind of like a lucid dream, kind of like a heaven.  I was following the dudes to my car through the street and I was feeling this spiral of creation moving though my body.  It was very relaxing and when it reached my abdomen, I pissed myself a bit.  Man, that felt good.  So I walked over to my car and this dude had the backdoor of my Pontiac open and was trying to get me to go in.  I thought he wanted to have gay sex with me, so I was like, hell no, man.  I walked down this block a block continuing to feel like I was on a fixed path, and at one point, I was released from the path.  It was as if God had said, "You may now go free about the world."  My eyes widened, and at the absolute top of my lungs (at probably 2am) I stared screaming "I CAN DO WHAT I FUCKIN WANT" and started running through the streets, feeling like everything was my lucid dream to play with.  At this point, my mind was pretty clear, if someone would have told me, "Dude, you're not in a dream world man, this is reality and you're waking people up and they're looking at you."  I would have stopped and been like, "Oh shit, man... my bad!"  But I never heard this.  So I was kicking shit over, screaming the name of the girl I loved and broke up with me (Megan), punching my buddy in the shoulder full strength, punching car hoods, stripping off pieces of clothing, etc., etc.  I found a nice empty insection by some factories and was throwing around tires.  In this intersection, I found a van to pick on, took off a valve cap, ripped off the rear view mirror and crunched it up.  My hands were soaked in blood.

All of this could have been avoided, very easily.  However, I'm glad it wasn't.  That moment was the one and only time in my life I felt completely free to do whatever it was I pleased, and I did whatever the fuck I wanted to do.  It was glorious.
Logged
ACHIEVE

pmcd9

  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #25 on: April 28, 2006, 04:25:15 pm »

To paraphrase Hank Hill, you don't have a drug problem you have an idiot problem.  Although, as fucked up as you were, you probably would have caused some trouble anyway without their interference help.  The milk thing is for heroin.  Milk will calm down a heroin addict who is freaking out.  I've seen it work.  When a person is having a bad acid trip and they finally mellow out the best thing to do is leave them alone.  Well i'm glad that the worst you got was some minor cuts.  If you feel the need to do drugs again, prepare yourself better.  Create a safe environment in which to trip out in and don't trip with a bunch of fools that are gonna lead you into the street when you are peaking.

~Paul
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

smick

  • -=Ray=-
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1351
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1437
  • MasturBot 342: ONLINE
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #26 on: April 28, 2006, 04:50:13 pm »

If you feel the need to do drugs again, prepare yourself better. 

I would suggest duct taping thick socks over your hands, of course, the perception that your arms end in gray stumps can be troublesome.
Logged

robot_god

  • roast beef (the middle cat)
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 74
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1195
  • Oh my gosh, dude.
    • View Profile
    • ALP Myspace Site
Re: I have quit
« Reply #27 on: April 28, 2006, 04:54:36 pm »

Well i'm glad that the worst you got was some minor cuts.

Aye.  About a day or two later, I read on Fark.com about some dude doing the exact same thing, except he was totally nude and found dead due to blood loss after smashing the window of a cop car with his body.
Logged
ACHIEVE

CortJstr

  • Mod Squad
  • Philippe is standing on it
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 338
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 9820
  • Which gives us AN EXCUSE TO DRINK!
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #28 on: April 28, 2006, 05:59:21 pm »

Some would say there are no such thing as coincidences. I am not one of them, though. I chose him out of thousands at cute overload for exactly that reason.

"Dude, why did you turn on the light? Look - I just cannot deal with you now"

Though I might change it soon to our new kitten! (pictures of me making faces at him are beneath the glowing pickle). His name at the shelter was Filipe, but we just couldn't take ourselves seriously calling a kitten Filipe. So we moved him from Spain to France, and now he's Phillipe! Which, for some reason, is a perfectly reasonable cat name.

The cat is totally playing you. He knows how cute he is and is using it to his advantage.
Logged

AlohaDawg

  • Moderator
  • LAZARUS, Tasseled Loafer of the Powerful
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 79
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 4184
  • Crawlin' back to prosperity
    • View Profile
Re: I have quit
« Reply #29 on: April 28, 2006, 06:01:21 pm »

I had to put my cat down earlier this year after having him for 16 years. He was probably closer to 17 years old, he was a stray. I'm posting this because I'm happy to see that he was reincarnated and in good hands.

Your Philippe looks a lot like ol' Spanky.
Logged
Pages: 1 [2] 3   Go Up