So what's wrong with running out and getting knocked up?
Do you hate your mother? Do you not want to make major life changes just to make her happy?
Jeebus, Somebody nicetrousers. What kind of a daughter are you?
Heh! That's why I <3 the Jough.
I have a very acute sense of unworthiness, as Americans hog a huge percentage of the world's resources. It is just how our economy was structured. I cannot ignore the fact that Americans' ecological footprints are huge. At the same time, there must be new seed to continue paying the social security and what have you. I guess for me it boils down to my faith in our culture. Are we really the new Roman Empire, which is getting fit to burn and end in a firey apocalypse? Or should I just calm the hell down and have children, as Gwyneth Paltrow encouraged (rolls eyes).
It is indeed tough. As CJ and countless others have stated, I was engaged to a crap dude. I certainly don't want to have a crap husband. I don't want to say "never", but I sure don't want to have a babydaddy.
I need to calm the hell DOWN. I don't know why I get so neurotic about this. I don't even have a boyfriend, let alone a husband who wants kids.
Crazy dreams: I dreamed last night that I was pregnant on our island (no hospital, just a clinic) and that I went into labour during my 8th month. I think that i had this weird-ass dream was because I was reviewing OB-GYN emergencies in my paramedic textbook. In my dream, I had abruptio placentae, and they had to do an emergency C-section and do a hysterectomy. I don't know how they did that, since we don't have an OR in our clinic. In the dream, I was totally in awe of the baby because I felt such love for her, but I also felt really sad that this was my first and last child due to the hysterectomy. I remember that I was very worried that I did not have a carseat or bassinet for the little baby, who was a girl. Then a bunch of people gave me a carseat and other necessities from the church. After that, in a separate dream, I dreamt that my teeth cracked and fell out. WTF?