Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

Making money from art is not vulgar. Art is a commodity. It makes people feel something. It raises the greater sum of human happiness. It increases the gaiety of the nation. It has a value. -John Allison

Pages: 1 [2] 3   Go Down

Author Topic: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006  (Read 5906 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

theinevitable

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 486
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12139
    • View Profile
    • tweet tweet fun fun
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #15 on: July 11, 2006, 10:52:25 pm »

today, this lady came through the checkout buying Veal, 2 bottles of cheap crappy wine, and a carton of cigarretes.

Every time this happens, I want to cry.

also: if I see one more person slap a child, I will lose it. My plan is to pick up a 2-liter bottle of soda and just hurl it at the person's head.
Logged
Social pressures exist
And if you think about them all of the time
You're gonna find that your head's been kicked in
You're gonna do it all for the grind

AlohaDawg

  • Mod Squad
  • LAZARUS, Tasseled Loafer of the Powerful
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 79
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 4184
  • Crawlin' back to prosperity
    • View Profile
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #16 on: July 11, 2006, 11:13:27 pm »

today, this lady came through the checkout buying Veal, 2 bottles of cheap crappy wine, and a carton of cigarretes.

Every time this happens, I want to cry.

also: if I see one more person slap a child, I will lose it. My plan is to pick up a 2-liter bottle of soda and just hurl it at the person's head.

Dude, do you need the job or not? Because, in customer service roles, you gotta eat the shit on your plate and smile about it all day long.

Maybe this is not the job for you.
Logged

Mite

  • Motel 6 Kind of Girl
  • King of the Make-Outs
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 6
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 584
    • View Profile
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #17 on: July 11, 2006, 11:20:14 pm »

Oh yeah man, my MIL switched from K-Mart to Target back in the day just because of the decrease in incidents of child abuse. That's rough stuff to watch. I want to put DFACS on speed dial every time I go shopping.

And Dawg, I think telling stories about customers is actually a perk of retail. I assumed that Mr. Inevitable was just being overly dramatic so as to humorously relay an otherwise painful fact of human existance.
Logged
I'm no longer a Bankhead teacher, but I'll still take your cookies.

AlohaDawg

  • Mod Squad
  • LAZARUS, Tasseled Loafer of the Powerful
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 79
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 4184
  • Crawlin' back to prosperity
    • View Profile
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #18 on: July 11, 2006, 11:44:41 pm »

I did retail too...could killed some people.

The stories are good, but not always worth the cognitive pain of dealing with people all day long. Some folks can't handle it. Finding a better job is better than getting fired or worse...
Logged

Mite

  • Motel 6 Kind of Girl
  • King of the Make-Outs
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 6
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 584
    • View Profile
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #19 on: July 12, 2006, 12:59:26 am »

Yeah, but everybody needs a little time to get broken in, y'know? I don't think anybody is born with the necessary ability to smile through clenched teeth.

If you're still bitching in a month, though, you're gonna have to get a better job. Got that?
Logged
I'm no longer a Bankhead teacher, but I'll still take your cookies.

Bobby Isosceles

  • Guest
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #20 on: July 12, 2006, 02:43:56 am »

Chicken marsala taunts me. Every time I look at an italian menu I see the description and think, "that sounds good." Then I see then I'm reading the description for chicken marsala and am disappointed. I find it somehow worse than the sum of its parts. Either that or I just really don't like the wine that's used in it.

Try substituting equal parts port and sherry for Marsala and you will find it less cloying.
Logged

AugustWest

  • Over Easy
  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 774
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 10549
  • Bulbous, also tapered.
    • View Profile
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #21 on: July 12, 2006, 02:56:44 am »

That is one disturbing avatar.
Logged
Infinitely vast, infinitely detailed.

Lister

  • Teodor
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 101
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 892
  • 2, 4, 6, 8, time to transubstantiate!
    • View Profile
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #22 on: July 12, 2006, 03:10:02 am »

That is one disturbing avatar.

In other words, Hi, Bobby!
Logged
Lister.  Not that one, the other one.

jough

  • God's Own Dick
  • Administrator
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 948
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6871
  • If you've got the time, we've got El Guapo.
    • View Profile
    • poetry archives
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #23 on: July 12, 2006, 03:51:16 am »

That was the first avatar to ever creep me out, and yet I couldn't look away.  I think I may have to make that one my desktop background.

Nicely played, good sir.

Mite

  • Motel 6 Kind of Girl
  • King of the Make-Outs
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 6
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 584
    • View Profile
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #24 on: July 12, 2006, 04:47:37 am »

I think I may have to make that one my desktop background.

*Weeps*
Logged
I'm no longer a Bankhead teacher, but I'll still take your cookies.

theinevitable

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 486
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12139
    • View Profile
    • tweet tweet fun fun
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #25 on: July 12, 2006, 06:08:05 am »

yeah, sorry about the bitching. I don't actually react with tears or slaps. I am just overly dramatic. Really, I try hard to be good at it and say "how are you today, ma'am?" to the lady who is screaming at her kid for, you know, looking at a toy. And I make chit-chat with little old ladies who are so nice. That part of the job is good.

I think I creeped out a lady today because I said "ma'am, that baby is beautiful." Seriously though, the baby was gorgeous.
Logged
Social pressures exist
And if you think about them all of the time
You're gonna find that your head's been kicked in
You're gonna do it all for the grind

misterqueue

  • Sick Fuck
  • VIP
  • R I S O T T O ?
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 25
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 2011
  • I can do anything I want. And so can you.
    • View Profile
    • A Reason for Diseasin'
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #26 on: July 12, 2006, 10:13:06 am »

I think I creeped out a lady today because I said "ma'am, that baby is beautiful." Seriously though, the baby was gorgeous.

You should always finish this statement out with "how much do you want for her?"


I'm just sayin'.
Logged
So it's satire, is it?  Well that changes everything!

Lockjaw is serious times.

jough

  • God's Own Dick
  • Administrator
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 948
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6871
  • If you've got the time, we've got El Guapo.
    • View Profile
    • poetry archives
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #27 on: July 12, 2006, 02:46:54 pm »

"How much for just five minutes with that gorgeous baby?"

Yeah, I don't know why you creep people out, theinevitable.  People must just be weird. :P

theinevitable

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 486
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12139
    • View Profile
    • tweet tweet fun fun
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #28 on: July 12, 2006, 05:15:18 pm »

it isn't OK to tell someone their baby is beautiful? did I miss this somehow?

and to add to an earlier comment: I bitch about the people because people will listen to the fun stories. The things I actually hate are the things that suck about any such job-- the boredom, the standing for hours, etc. I know I will get used to it eventually. And I know that complaining about that is like complaining that eventually I'll die.
Logged
Social pressures exist
And if you think about them all of the time
You're gonna find that your head's been kicked in
You're gonna do it all for the grind

AlohaDawg

  • Mod Squad
  • LAZARUS, Tasseled Loafer of the Powerful
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 79
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 4184
  • Crawlin' back to prosperity
    • View Profile
Re: The Hopes and the Spellings - 11 July 2006
« Reply #29 on: July 12, 2006, 07:54:45 pm »

That baby looks delicious works too.
Logged
Pages: 1 [2] 3   Go Up