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[robot_god]

So, Dude, is this a hypothetical question or are you pulling some kind of real life scheme?

[V-Adore]

Soft Cell's 'Tainted Love' would make an early appearance, Berlin would have to ride on the Metro, Blondi might 'Call Me' and Duran Duran would be 'Hungry Like the Wolf'.

If we're doing school dances, I think you've ignored the big winner: "Cotton Eye Joe." Were school dances not allowed to end without this one? Also, "Baby Got Back" was always a favorite, although I was eternally perplexed by the glee with which this song was embraced by white suburban girls without asses. (Hint to these girls: Sir Mix-A-Lot makes it very clear throughout the song that he does not want to get with you.)

[thedudeabides85]

So, Dude, is this a hypothetical question or are you pulling some kind of real life scheme?

I'm always scheming to dry hump something, but I was just making a party mix on itunes and it made me curious about what others think is essential to the boogie.

SPEAKING OF DRY HUMPING, I'd advise you all to check out the "frottage" column on wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frottage).  It's got pretty vital information on the "Ivy League Rub" and also axillary intercourse, which is apparently doing it with someone's armpit.  It gave me the idea for maxillary intercourse, in which the c*ck lines the inner jaw and the recipient is advised against eating solid foods for a month.  I'm saving marriages here.

[CortJstr]

If we're doing school dances, I think you've ignored the big winner: "Cotton Eye Joe." Were school dances not allowed to end without this one? Also, "Baby Got Back" was always a favorite, although I was eternally perplexed by the glee with which this song was embraced by white suburban girls without asses. (Hint to these girls: Sir Mix-A-Lot makes it very clear throughout the song that he does not want to get with you.)

I remember one year at homecoming they played the Macarena twice, the Electric Slide 3 times, and dance remixes of YMCA (it's already a dance song, fuckers!) and Smells Like Teen Spirit.

I'm going to repeat that, because it bears repeating: a dance remix of Smells Like Teen Spirit.

I'm not familiar with Cotton Eye Joe.

[V-Adore]

I remember one year at homecoming they played the Macarena twice, the Electric Slide 3 times, and dance remixes of YMCA (it's already a dance song, fuckers!) and Smells Like Teen Spirit.

I'm going to repeat that, because it bears repeating: a dance remix of Smells Like Teen Spirit.

I'm not familiar with Cotton Eye Joe.

Be enlightened. Note that we're talking about the Rednex song here.

As for dance remixes, my last computer (which I still need to salvage the data from, le sigh) had an extensive collection of dance-remix MP3s. Perhaps the most spectacular member of that hallowed band was the dance remix of "Zombie," although the "Hall of the Mountain King" remix was a contender too (and bizarrely good).

Two other random tangents:
1) Have people realized yet that YMCA is a song about men hooking up with other men? This is so blatantly obvious that I can't imagine people are still in the dark about it, but are they just ignoring it? Or what?
2) If we're going to go into the wine-dark honeyed center of "bad dance songs from childhood/adolescence," I should probably invoke Ace of Base now. Really, any Ace of Base song is fine.

[KeithHernandez]

Ace of Base- I have been trying to repress this memory for many a year, probably why I do so many drugs.

Ace of Base was the first cd I ever owned (I did have tapes before this) and, on a trip to Colorado from Oklahoma, I made my father listen to taht cd on repeat the whole way.  I would have been so, so mad at me if I was him.  I think he was, because he still brings this up.  Also, this is probably why I will never have kids.  Ace of Base made a huge impact on my life.  I saw the sign, and it said run from your past.

[V-Adore]

I saw the sign, and it said run from your past.

Can'd!

[CortJstr]

I don't mind good remixes. Somewhere I have a BT remix of Seal. Also, Sarah McLaughlin (sp?) I'll admit to digging on mash-ups as well. But this Nirvana remix was not only a really weird choice but extremely poorly done. It was basically "Here we are now, we're Nirvana THUMPA THUMPA THUMPA THUMPA" repeated for 6.5 minutes.

[Drygioni]

This is very specific, but the last 2:15 of 'Found A Job' by Talking Heads on the The Name Of This Band Is Talking Heads album.

[slink]

I don't mind good remixes. Somewhere I have a BT remix of Seal. Also, Sarah McLaughlin (sp?) I'll admit to digging on mash-ups as well. But this Nirvana remix was not only a really weird choice but extremely poorly done. It was basically "Here we are now, we're Nirvana THUMPA THUMPA THUMPA THUMPA" repeated for 6.5 minutes.

Oh dear god, that is like the pinnacle of my hatred for dance remixes. And tell me they didn't actually change the lyrics?

[CortJstr]

Oh dear god, that is like the pinnacle of my hatred for dance remixes. And tell me they didn't actually change the lyrics?

Changing lyrics would take effort. It was a line or two of the real song, then like 7 seconds of a generic beat. They'd repeat that a couple times then move on to another couple lines.

Now DJ Jay-R - Smells Like Beach Boys (Nirvana vs. The Beach Boys) is disturbingly well done.

[slink]

Now DJ Jay-R - Smells Like Beach Boys (Nirvana vs. The Beach Boys) is disturbingly well done.

That is ludicrously well done.
And, in all fairness to Nirvana then, at no point do the words "we're Nirvana" appear. It may have been their poppiest song, but they never went that far. Aaaah, but it is in the Weird Al version of the song... So I'll let you off.

[CortJstr]

That is ludicrously well done.
And, in all fairness to Nirvana then, at no point do the words "we're Nirvana" appear. It may have been their poppiest song, but they never went that far. Aaaah, but it is in the Weird Al version of the song... So I'll let you off.

True, it was actually "entertainers" but my approxiquote^TM above was to make it seem even more sad. Because no mere words can convey the sheer crapiness of this remix.

[slink]

True, it was actually "entertainers" but my approxiquote^TM above was to make it seem even more sad.

*cough*'entertain us'*cough*

But indeed, I do see what you mean.

[Carlos del Vaca]

Our high school dances always included "Da Butt" by EU.  Good for the call 'n' response bit.

Cort got a big ol' butt!  Oh yeah?
Slink got a big ol' butt!  Oh yeah?
Judy got a big ol' butt!  Oh yeah?