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[littlefallsmets]

That whole thread was a fascinating look inside of your minds, by the way.

There are few things more interesting to me than frank discussions of the range of sexual expression and desire and, like, how the rich tapestry of what things fire different peoples engines effect those individuals as well as society as a whole.

It's not the whole picture of a person but... real insight into an individual's sexual pecadilloes can open a lot of doors on understanding who they are, I find. "Know the kink, know the person" is a vast oversimplification of my thoughts on this but it'd make a hell of a bumper sticker.

I feel similarly about one's taste in music and one's thoughts on religion/God/the spiritual dimension.

If you know a person's particular sexual bent, their taste in music, their spiritual reality and their major youthful traumas, you've got four of the really important... we'll say... lenses to examine their personality through.

But sex is often the hardest one to get an honest discussion on.

Everybody will pitch their music, most people will pitch their god and once you get to know someone pretty well, they're pretty open about whether they have any one-event signficiant childhood traumas... or as scientists call them "Batman events"...

But an HONEST discussion of sex? That's a difficult one.

(I almost typed "that's a hard one" but I knew where that would go.)

[Sub_Topical]

(I almost typed "that's a hard one" but I knew where that would go.)

No, you don't, that's the whole reason for wanting the sex conversation.

[linnea]

Trust me. It *is* possible to lose a toenail. I've done it many times.


Carry on.

Ahh... I hear that is very common for runners, dancers, and other athletes. oh god, omba...I'm gonna have nightmares now!

[KeithHernandez]

It is that time again, time for KeithHernandez' Two Truths and a Lie, Baseball Edition (because my last one sucked):

1)  One time I met Joe Carter (who is one of only two players to hit a home run to end the World Series).  He was my hero at the time, and came from Milwood High School in my hometown (OKC).  He also has the same first name as me and I met him in Dallas at a hotel next to the Texas Rangers stadium.  My little league baseball team and I played against him and one of his teammates in a game of pool baseball.  I did not get a signature, as it was not allowed at the hotel, but we did get a team picture with Joe Carter.

2)  I met Sammy Sosa at a Oklahoma City 89er's game.  It was one of those minor league things where some of the players sign autographs and shake hands. 

3)  I met Tony Gwynn when I was on a family vacation in San Diego.  I ran down the street to get his autograph, for about half a mile, caught him, and then had him turn me down.  I hated him for a while after that, but now I have gotten over it and he regains his place with my other sports heros (Barry Sanders, Joe Carter, Tony Gwynn and Manny Ramirez).

[littlefallsmets]

I don't know which is false but...

I just wanted to add that Tony Gywnn has the whitest voice on Earth.

I have a pretty white voice but if you heard my voice and his, you'd guess I was the ethnic fellow.

[jough]

Busy work week - just getting to this thread now...

Here are three from me:

1) My first job out of high school was working as a "special analyst" for the NSA.  They hired me because I scored high on a not-so-standardized test that they slipped to my high school to suss-out potential candidates.

2) I ghost-wrote a novel that appeared in the New York Times bestseller list (for two weeks).

3) I have slept with an academy award nominated actress.

[KeithHernandez]

I would guess 3 (or 1), but for some reason I really believe that you wrote that novel.

I am probably wrong.

[Muse_Of_Fire]

Keith, I'm going to guess #2, simply on the basis of the discrepancy in the amount of details in #1 and #3, compared to #2.

[littlefallsmets]

3) I have slept with an academy award nominated actress.

Was Minnie Driver nominated for Good Will Hunting?

I mean, okay, she's a little hossy but I just have a thing for tall ladies.

I'll say one is the fake, just because I'd want to hear the stories for two and three.

[Muse_Of_Fire]

Keith, I'm going to guess #2, simply on the basis of the discrepancy in the amount of details in #1 and #3, compared to #2.


1. I'm allergic to peanuts.
2. I've eaten duck feet.
3. I run marathons.

[iron_felix]

Felix: #1, because I want the other two to be true.

Correct, and for exactly the right reason.  I did have a Hitler mustache, and I did have a mustache for five months, but thankfully they were not one and the same.  My New Year's resolution last year was to grow a mustache, which turned out to be the only reason I stuck with it for so long.  You see, I'm one of those guys who has blond hair on his head but much darker facial hair.  Naturally, I expected this to be the case with my upper lip as well, but instead I wound up with the tawniest of all mustaches ever to have existed.  Even after I grew it to a respectable length it was indistinguishable from peachfuzz from anything more than three feet away.  On a dare, I agreed to shave it into a Hitler mustache for 24 hours before getting rid of it entirely.  I chickened about a quarter of the way through, which was probably for the best.

As for the national anthem bit...

My elementary school was the only one in the district that could accommodate hearing-impaired students, so that had become kind of a thing there.  We got to learn ASL for language classes, and the music program featured a signing choir with as many members as the regular choir.  When I was in fifth grade, said signing choir was selected from amongst similar schools in other districts to sing at Turner Field before a Braves game.  A matter of great pride for the school, to be sure, but as I was not in the signing choir I would not have had any part in this myself were it not for a rather obvious complication.

As awesome as it would have been to have the entire stadium silent while twenty-odd schoolchildren did the national anthem in sign language, the Braves' front office was having none of it, so the school recruited some other students to stand next to them and actually sing the words.  Somehow, after having failed an audition for the non-signing choir, I was able to make it into this group, and so it was that on one bright April afternoon an eleven-year-old kid got to stand in front of thirty thousand baseball fans and honor America.

We got to stay and watch the game for free afterwards, but I don't remember anything that happened, or even who we were playing against - I think it was Cincinnati, but I'm not sure.  I only even remember how old I was at the time because on the way off the field we got to walk past the Braves' dugout and I shook hands with Kenny Lofton, who only played for the Braves in 1997.  Unfortunately I didn't start to become really interested in baseball until later, so a lot of the magnitude of the event was lost on me at the time.

Also,

I just wanted to add that Tony Gywnn has the whitest voice on Earth.

I have a pretty white voice but if you heard my voice and his, you'd guess I was the ethnic fellow.

Quoted for truth.  Tony Gwynn is basically the Hamburglar.

[KeithHernandez]

Yeah, it was number two.  What happended was, I had a lot of info, but I thought it gave it away that it was a lie.  Sosa did play for the minor league team in town, and I did see him play, but I didn't get his autograph.  However, if you would have seen the little autograph stands they had, you would have understood the small amount of detail.  It is usually just like three guys sitting there while a lot of 8 year olds walk by silently and get some things signed.  At least that is how I remember it.


Jough:  yeah, I am going to switch to 1 being the lie.

Muse:  I am going to have to go with 2, as I am just assuming three to be true, and think that you are tricking us on the other two, since we know how you feel about food.

Rock and Roll Pest Control:

1)  I was once at a concert with less than 20 people.  Wayne Coyne (of Flaming Lips fame) was one member of the crowd.

2)  Once at the same venue, I saw Spoon.  I stood in line 5 hours before the show started, but it was well worth it.

3)  I have seen Bob Dylan, the Flaming Lips, and Deerhoof (at separate times) at a zoo.

[linnea]

Busy work week - just getting to this thread now...

Here are three from me:

1) My first job out of high school was working as a "special analyst" for the NSA.  They hired me because I scored high on a not-so-standardized test that they slipped to my high school to suss-out potential candidates.

2) I ghost-wrote a novel that appeared in the New York Times bestseller list (for two weeks).

3) I have slept with an academy award nominated actress.

Damn...I'd bet dollars to doughnuts that number one is TRUE. That leaves me with numbers 2 and 3. Damn...

Okay, I'll go out on a limb and guess that you didn't ghost-write a NYT bestseller, only because I bet that you wrote one! And we all know that El Guapo can charm the panties off any Academy-Award nominated actress.

[AugustWest]

I'm gonna guess that all three of Jough's are lies.

[V-Adore]

V: #2, because if I were going to make up a plausible lie based on things we vaguely know about you, it would be something like this.

Belatedly: while I can't fault your logic, #2 is actually true. And embarrassing. 1 was the lie -- I own that bracelet, but it was crossbow-hunted by my fifth-grade teacher, not by me.

Anyway, maybe I'll think of another round later. I'm kind of a terminally uninteresting person.