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@achewood Barely passed Oregon driver's test. Lots of rules about Yielding to the Distraught and slow-moving salmon trucks on one-way switchbacks.

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Author Topic: Today I'm gonna...  (Read 1344174 times)

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theinevitable

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5655 on: October 28, 2009, 05:51:45 am »

The Young Lady is doing this thing I really don't like where she uses me as an excuse to blow off work. screw that noise, I feel bad enough about my own irresponsibility.

She knows my weakness, which is text messages that say she wants to come over.

So far I am resisting, but that can only last so long.
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JorgeFabregas

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5656 on: October 28, 2009, 01:40:28 pm »

Wombat, congrats on selling your book! Circumstances be damned.
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dejavroom

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5657 on: October 28, 2009, 01:51:34 pm »

Sigh. Just once I'd like to accomplish something and have it be unambigious good news. There is always a "yes, but."

I know the feeling, but conga rats anyway (is this your first? Supposedly having one helps you getting the next ones, and ensuring that the deals get better)
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bluemoon72

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5658 on: October 28, 2009, 01:52:19 pm »

What happened to them after that?

Okay, so it was the middle of winter when I had to have my rats (Ben and Jerry) put down.  (I had rats in high school named Simon and Bono. Tastes change.) I wanted to bury them, but the ground was frozen, being Minnesota and all.  My previously-mentioned friend Chris had room in his freezer in his townhome, so I bagged them up and in they went.  Well, over that winter Chris bought a house and moved everything out of his townhouse to the new house and put the townhouse on the market.  His new house came with its own appliances, so...long story short, the rats stayed in the townhouse freezer, we forgot about the rats, the freezer was unplugged along with the other appliances when the house went up for sale, nearly a year later the townhouse was sold, Chris made one final pass through the townhouse to ensure everything was out, opened the freezer door, and...liquefied rat dripped out the freezer and ran down the refrigerator door.  He was gentleman enough to scrub the mess out (the putrified, stinking, gooey mess) and never tell me until I asked a couple of years later what ever happened to my rats.  
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JorgeFabregas

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5659 on: October 28, 2009, 01:54:36 pm »

That's a good friend.

Was Simon named after Simon Le Bon?
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wombat

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5660 on: October 28, 2009, 02:21:52 pm »

I am so pleased at the image of 'conga rats,' I am now reluctant to spoil it by sharing my tale of exploding penis tumors.
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dejavroom

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5661 on: October 28, 2009, 02:34:45 pm »

"Dude did you just spill my rat"?


"Don't drink that, it's rat."

I could do this all day.


I'm sorry. On the positive side, I'm learning a lot (about horrifying, childhood-destroying things, but you take what you can...)
« Last Edit: October 28, 2009, 02:37:56 pm by dejavroom »
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bluemoon72

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5662 on: October 28, 2009, 02:59:03 pm »

That's a good friend.

Was Simon named after Simon Le Bon?
Ummm...wow...I honestly don't remember WHY I named her Simon!  She was Bono's daughter with The Edge, a male rat--I had them for my advanced biology class, and The Edge escaped after impregnating Bono.  He had massive--and I mean monstrous--testicles, that dragged behind him and made him walk with this spread-legged waddle.  Last I heard he was spotted in the cafeteria--I had warned the school food team in advance that he had been let loose by some joker in another class period and they might spot him, so they weren't freaked out when he did show up.  They were unable to catch him, however, and he was never seen again.  

Bono's first litter of pups...well, it ended badly.  People were so intrigued and curious about the little naked rat babies that Bono started feeling threatened, and overnight she ate her babies.  I came into class first thing the next morning to check on them, and there was one adult rat and two wee little skulls.  Nothing else.  She had had six pups.  Simon came from her second litter.
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smick

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5663 on: October 28, 2009, 03:17:33 pm »

"Well in truth it is my U2/Furry/Male Pregnancy* fan fiction.  I hope you like it."


Really, the term is MPreg, but I didn't think that'd play in Peoria.
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bluemoon72

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5664 on: October 28, 2009, 04:06:15 pm »

"Well in truth it is my U2/Furry/Male Pregnancy* fan fiction.  I hope you like it."
There is not one stitch of fiction in this; it's all true!
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smick

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5665 on: October 28, 2009, 04:31:17 pm »

Oh man, that looks like a great place to drink a beer and think about nothing for a bit.
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Victoria Waterfield

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5666 on: October 28, 2009, 05:04:03 pm »

Ummm...wow...I honestly don't remember WHY I named her Simon!  She was Bono's daughter with The Edge, a male rat--I had them for my advanced biology class, and The Edge escaped after impregnating Bono.  He had massive--and I mean monstrous--testicles, that dragged behind him and made him walk with this spread-legged waddle.  Last I heard he was spotted in the cafeteria--I had warned the school food team in advance that he had been let loose by some joker in another class period and they might spot him, so they weren't freaked out when he did show up.  They were unable to catch him, however, and he was never seen again.  

Bono's first litter of pups...well, it ended badly.  People were so intrigued and curious about the little naked rat babies that Bono started feeling threatened, and overnight she ate her babies.  I came into class first thing the next morning to check on them, and there was one adult rat and two wee little skulls.  Nothing else.  She had had six pups.  Simon came from her second litter.


Canned for most of that, but particularly "The Edge escaped after impregnating Bono".
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wombat

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5667 on: October 28, 2009, 05:13:55 pm »

When are you inviting us all over for a pool party, Ash?
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bluemoon72

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5668 on: October 28, 2009, 05:56:12 pm »

Is that in California?  It's lovely.  I'll be there in 8 hours or so.
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Bobby Isosceles

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #5669 on: October 28, 2009, 06:00:28 pm »

Is that in California?  It's lovely.  I'll be there in 8 hours or so.

Why drive? There's one of those up at Paisley Park, and it is purple to boot.
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