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@achewood If Twain were alive today, he would guffaw despite his benevolent befuddlement.

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Author Topic: Today I'm gonna...  (Read 1348660 times)

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Arachno-capitalist

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10785 on: December 03, 2011, 03:08:25 pm »

Learning to use grandfather's slide rule. Welcome to Saturday Fun at the A-Cap house!
We sent men to the moon with these things.
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Guy at my watering hole: "Acap, why do you keep coming to Jack's?They just serve shitty burgers and happen to have beers on tap."
Acap: I was thirsty one day and I sat down. A year later, Jack's was built around me and thirst is a recurring thing.

Nabubrush

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10786 on: December 03, 2011, 03:47:50 pm »

Learning to use grandfather's slide rule. Welcome to Saturday Fun at the A-Cap house!
We sent men to the moon with these things.

Weirdly coincidental.

New guy here at work was looking for a calculator the other day and the old guys gave him a slide rule and started giving him the business over it.
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miles

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10787 on: December 03, 2011, 04:46:59 pm »

that thing looks really cool.  I'd love to see it in action.

See. Looks like a Segway with one big wheel.
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Order is indeed the dream of man, but chaos, which is only another word for dumb, blind, witless chance, is still the law of nature. - Wallace Stegner

miles

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10788 on: December 03, 2011, 04:56:25 pm »

Wait. I got that backwards. Everything is funny about Canada.

Did you know...
...that murder is illegal in Canda?

Edit: Has the Onion finally archived everything online? I remember trying to find this one a while back and could only find it on other websites.
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Order is indeed the dream of man, but chaos, which is only another word for dumb, blind, witless chance, is still the law of nature. - Wallace Stegner

smick

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10789 on: December 05, 2011, 07:24:13 am »

See. Looks like a Segway with one big wheel.

Disturbing Sudden Realization and Fact: I've seen everyone in that video naked.
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Nabubrush

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10790 on: December 05, 2011, 10:53:52 pm »

Disturbing Sudden Realization and Fact: I've seen everyone in that video naked.

Even the joggers? What do you people do when I'm out of town?
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Never feel that you're out of the loop, because the loop is you. - Platon

smick

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10791 on: December 06, 2011, 06:39:58 am »

Especially the joggers!

(Actually, all of the riders are Unicycle Bastards.  If you hit the webpage, you too can see everyone in that video mostly nude, right at the top!  The photo was taken during a local bike race.   A lot of Portland has seen them naked.)
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smick

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10792 on: December 09, 2011, 02:29:13 am »

While I was driving home tonight, I learned a valuable lesson.  

That lesson: Car windows are transparent.

I had been singing on my way home.  Rockin' out to the Beatles.  I pulled up to a stop light, and at that moment the song Money came on.   For some reason, the spirit moved me to sing the end of Happiness is a Warm Gun.  

Loudly.

With wonderful expression.

Expression that makes late night televangelists squirm nervously and say "Jeeze... chill out, guy."

So I'm screaming, and pounding on my steering wheel.  "WHEN I HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS, AND FEEL MY FINGER ON YOUR TRIGGER... I KNOOOOW THAT NOOOOBODY CAN DO ME NOOOOOOO HARM!"

I turn my head, wide-eyed and crazy and I'm face to face with a 10 year old boy sitting in the back of his parents SUV.

His eyes are as big as dinner plates and his mouth is hanging wide open because he is STARING AT A REAL... HONEST TO GOODNESS... BONAFIDE CRAZY PERSON.  

I blinked at him and was, at the very core of me, embarrassed.   I turned my head back to look forward just in time to hit post on Money and SCREAM AS LOUD AS I COULD..."THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE!"

I kinda felt like I embodied every "Haters Gonna Hate" and "Not A Single Fuck Was Given That Day" image macros as I drove away from that kid.
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greenkoolayd

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10793 on: December 09, 2011, 04:48:37 am »

While I was driving home tonight, I learned a valuable lesson.  

That lesson: Car windows are transparent.

I had been singing on my way home.  Rockin' out to the Beatles.  I pulled up to a stop light, and at that moment the song Money came on.   For some reason, the spirit moved me to sing the end of Happiness is a Warm Gun.  

Loudly.

With wonderful expression.

Expression that makes late night televangelists squirm nervously and say "Jeeze... chill out, guy."

So I'm screaming, and pounding on my steering wheel.  "WHEN I HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS, AND FEEL MY FINGER ON YOUR TRIGGER... I KNOOOOW THAT NOOOOBODY CAN DO ME NOOOOOOO HARM!"

I turn my head, wide-eyed and crazy and I'm face to face with a 10 year old boy sitting in the back of his parents SUV.

His eyes are as big as dinner plates and his mouth is hanging wide open because he is STARING AT A REAL... HONEST TO GOODNESS... BONAFIDE CRAZY PERSON.  

I blinked at him and was, at the very core of me, embarrassed.   I turned my head back to look forward just in time to hit post on Money and SCREAM AS LOUD AS I COULD..."THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE!"

I kinda felt like I embodied every "Haters Gonna Hate" and "Not A Single Fuck Was Given That Day" image macros as I drove away from that kid.

"am i bovvered, tho?"
(anyone ever watch "the catherine tate show" on netflix(or wherever)?

a sample, in case, "no".
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theinevitable

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10794 on: December 09, 2011, 04:42:56 pm »

Is it weird that as a 23 year old dude I have never owned a suit?

My roommate is trying to convince me that this is crazy.
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Social pressures exist
And if you think about them all of the time
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You're gonna do it all for the grind

theinevitable

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10795 on: December 09, 2011, 06:25:39 pm »

I guess his shock is mainly that I am applying to jobs and do not own a suit.
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Social pressures exist
And if you think about them all of the time
You're gonna find that your head's been kicked in
You're gonna do it all for the grind

Choop

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10796 on: December 09, 2011, 07:14:29 pm »

there is nothing wrong with a tuxedo, so long as it fits. i'm wearing one of mine tomorrow.
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littlefallsmets

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10797 on: December 09, 2011, 07:41:37 pm »

I'm about the most casual dude I know and I've had a suit or two to my name since I was...

15?

You know. For going through the motions of Catholic things and the like.
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jaydub

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10798 on: December 09, 2011, 10:41:29 pm »

Are you applying to jobs in which people wear suits?

Over dressed is almost as bad for you as under dressed. My last few interviews consisted of me in docker knock offs and a button shirt because that's what fit the place. It's more important to know your industry and the company culture and dress to that level than it is to parade around in your grown up suit.

You're selling yourself, not some fantasy suit wearing dude. Know your market.
It bear reminding that Ash and I (and Lister among others) live in California, where showing up naked to a job interview isn't necessarily prejudicial.  You should adjust expectations for whatever your market is.  I'm pretty sure A-CAP has said that East Coast job hunting required a high degree of hoity-toityness (not his actual words).
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KeithHernandez

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Re: Today I'm gonna...
« Reply #10799 on: December 09, 2011, 10:49:26 pm »

I'm 26 and have never owned a suit.  Or a blazer or whatever.  I live in Denver and we like to chill.
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