The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

@achewood I am in a bed with an Asleepness Hat on.

Pages: 1 ... 8 9 [10] 11 12 ... 16   Go Down

Author Topic: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!  (Read 42448 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

littlefallsmets

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 363
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6294
  • the perfect is the enemy of the good
    • View Profile
    • this is where I jot down random ideas
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #135 on: April 22, 2008, 03:14:59 am »
Anderson really is kind of... at the end of his string, isn't he?

He isn't in that Mo Vaughn range where both Castillo and Delgado are and I wanna put my fist through the wall at all times because of it but... yeah. Dude really should'a hung 'em up last year.
Logged
I do the Tweets @Cecconi140

melack

  • Philippe
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 70
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 940
  • Cheer up, hamburger.
    • View Profile
    • Worst Songs, Played on Ugliest Guitars
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #136 on: April 22, 2008, 11:55:46 pm »
I guess we'll have to agree to disagree on the fact that Anderson is or has ever been a particularly good player.
Logged

littlefallsmets

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 363
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6294
  • the perfect is the enemy of the good
    • View Profile
    • this is where I jot down random ideas
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #137 on: April 23, 2008, 04:30:26 am »
JJ Putz is healthy and looking for a good home.

Whatcha all got?
Logged
I do the Tweets @Cecconi140

melack

  • Philippe
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 70
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 940
  • Cheer up, hamburger.
    • View Profile
    • Worst Songs, Played on Ugliest Guitars
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #138 on: April 23, 2008, 04:26:44 pm »
I will trade you my motherfuck*ng left testicle for JJ Putz.
Logged

melack

  • Philippe
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 70
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 940
  • Cheer up, hamburger.
    • View Profile
    • Worst Songs, Played on Ugliest Guitars
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #139 on: April 23, 2008, 04:27:19 pm »
That's not a figure of speech, by the way. I will really do it.
Logged

jaydub

  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1493
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5056
  • Arrant pedantry
    • View Profile
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #140 on: April 23, 2008, 05:46:04 pm »
Quote from: melack on April 23, 2008, 04:26:44 pm
I will trade you my motherfuck*ng left testicle for JJ Putz.
Oddly enough, human testicles don't have the buying power that you might think.  Males already have two (the minimum necessary plus a spare) and women generally find them icky - particularly when they open a FedEx box to find one.

Astronauts and Lance Armstrong might be in the market.
Logged
If you desire peace, work for justice.

melack

  • Philippe
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 70
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 940
  • Cheer up, hamburger.
    • View Profile
    • Worst Songs, Played on Ugliest Guitars
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #141 on: April 23, 2008, 06:02:24 pm »
I don't see how LFM can't benefit from having a third testicle, possibly worn around his neck as a pendant.
Logged

Arachno-capitalist

  • Jacobean Fuckbot
  • Mom-Mom's Weepin' Eye
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 319
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 3967
  • Ostriches and I have a history. So I eat them.
    • View Profile
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #142 on: April 23, 2008, 06:40:30 pm »
I personally know a dude with a trio pack. He lost one while we were playing rugby, and when he got to the hospital they told him they could hook him up with a synthetic testicle. Naturally, he asked for 2. Insurance paid for the first nut, he paid for the other. This guy can also eat an entire beer can. Personally I feel like the third wheel would get bulky? Like that is a lot to be dangling around in the under carriage.
Logged
Guy at my watering hole: "Acap, why do you keep coming to Jack's?They just serve shitty burgers and happen to have beers on tap."
Acap: I was thirsty one day and I sat down. A year later, Jack's was built around me and thirst is a recurring thing.

melack

  • Philippe
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 70
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 940
  • Cheer up, hamburger.
    • View Profile
    • Worst Songs, Played on Ugliest Guitars
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #143 on: April 23, 2008, 06:49:51 pm »
This may or may not be a good time to mention that I have a very small, hardly distinguishable third nipple. To the untrained eye, it looks like a little scar. But close up, yep, it's a nipple.
Logged

jaydub

  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1493
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5056
  • Arrant pedantry
    • View Profile
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #144 on: April 23, 2008, 08:22:57 pm »
Quote from: Arachno-capitalist on April 23, 2008, 06:40:30 pm
I personally know a dude with a trio pack. He lost one while we were playing rugby...
Bitten off by an angry hooker?
Logged
If you desire peace, work for justice.

Drygioni

  • formerly Judy
  • VIP
  • Onstad's Left Shoe
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 194
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1796
    • View Profile
    • FACEBOOK
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #145 on: April 25, 2008, 12:05:59 am »
Can we get a list up of who's who? I'd like to know who I'm losing to/sharking.
Logged
I am sorry for my behaviour last night.

littlefallsmets

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 363
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 6294
  • the perfect is the enemy of the good
    • View Profile
    • this is where I jot down random ideas
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #146 on: April 25, 2008, 12:25:37 am »
I am The Damned Human Race... because I am a huge fan of the work of Mark Twain.

(Also: mood disorders.)
Logged
I do the Tweets @Cecconi140

Golfhaus

  • VIP
  • Onstad's Left Shoe
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 116
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1625
  • He does not approve. Not at all.
    • View Profile
    • http://www.prolefeed.com
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #147 on: April 25, 2008, 12:27:11 am »
I'm the Flying Dutch Ovens.
Logged

Carlos del Vaca

  • The Mayor
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1316
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5007
  • Greetings from Banana Town
    • View Profile
    • bigfool.com
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #148 on: April 25, 2008, 02:41:02 am »
Banana Town represent!
Logged
My friends call me the Mayor.
My enemies don't call me anything.  'Cuz they're all dead.

Carlos del Vaca

  • The Mayor
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1316
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5007
  • Greetings from Banana Town
    • View Profile
    • bigfool.com
Re: Pretend Sports '08 - This Time, Its Personal!
« Reply #149 on: April 25, 2008, 01:05:49 pm »
I think I have nearly pieced together our league directory:

Damned Human Race       LFMets
Flying Dutch Ovens       Golfhaus
The Muttonheads       AugustWest
Banana Town Bashers       Carlos del Vaca
Zombie Reagans       melack
THE MEN WITH NO NAME    A-Cap
Cheddar Crooks       Asherdan
RumSodomyandtheLash    Judy
I Predict Theriot
Fightin' Phlogistons

I believe these last two teams belong to iron_felix and Turbo Ninja, but I don't know who's who.  Please update or correct as necessary.
Logged
My friends call me the Mayor.
My enemies don't call me anything.  'Cuz they're all dead.
Pages: 1 ... 8 9 [10] 11 12 ... 16   Go Up
« previous next »