Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

Did you know...
that nobody but Wombat notices what is in the News Box?

Pages: 1 2 3 [4] 5 6   Go Down

Author Topic: Grade School Confidential  (Read 11799 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

KeithHernandez

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Ocular Shenanigans
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1014
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 3209
  • I am, again, Keith Hernandez
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #45 on: May 22, 2008, 08:45:28 pm »

3) I used to bring my friends into my brother's room and encourage them to sniff his bed, on account of bedwetting.

I think the whole bedwetting thing is a lie really.  Like, it is just in cartoons.


1.  I had a concussion.
2.  I broke my right arm.
3.  I broke my left arm.
Logged
You say one day soon we will all stand as brothers, 'til then I guess we'll just stand around.

Ruta Bagas

  • Dr. Andretti
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 108
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 426
  • Is that a shiny ring?
    • View Profile
    • The World Is Lovely
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #46 on: May 22, 2008, 08:56:58 pm »

The lie

Fine work. It was the Dizzy Hawk. That thing LOOMS OUT OF THE SKY and there is NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT. What if they were real? God, that thing had me shitting myself. Speaking of which, I'm going to declare your number one a lie and not listen if you try to claim it's true because I just don't want it to be. You may picture me with my fingers in my ears going "LA LA LA", much like I did when the Dizzy Hawk appeared.

Also, nobody breaks their left arm.

jay-ell

  • Den Mother
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 407
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7869
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #47 on: May 22, 2008, 09:42:20 pm »

We know 3 is true, so I'll say 2 just because I don't remember you mentioning flatness before and I'm too lazy to check.

1) I didn't learn to swim until I was 11 although my mom tried getting me lessons earlier

2) Despite being in Cub Scouts for 2 years I've never been camping

3) I used to mark pages in Choose Your Own Adventure books to make sure I eventually got to read every page

Nope, 2 is true.  1 is the lie, I see my mom's boobs all the time, even now.  When I was a kid I would sit on the closed toilet lid while she was taking a bath and we'd just chat.  Mom was a great example of how to be comfortable in your skin. 

If 2 is true, then 1 is the lie, because who didn't mark pages in CYOA books? 

Jaydub, I thought at first that #2 was a lie, because I didn't think a five year old could throw a brick with enough force to shatter a window.  But then I thought about five year olds I have known, and reconsidered this position.  So now I think 3 is the lie, because it seems like the kind of thing you would spare your friends, assuming you liked them. 
Logged
"I always hear 'punch me in the face' when you're speaking. But it's usually subtext." -- Martin Freeman as John Watson

CortJstr

  • Mod Squad
  • Philippe is standing on it
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 338
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 9820
  • Which gives us AN EXCUSE TO DRINK!
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #48 on: May 22, 2008, 10:02:32 pm »

If 2 is true, then 1 is the lie, because who didn't mark pages in CYOA books? 

Correct. I never learned how to swim.
Logged

jaydub

  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1493
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5056
  • Arrant pedantry
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #49 on: May 22, 2008, 10:11:21 pm »

Jaydub, I thought at first that #2 was a lie, because I didn't think a five year old could throw a brick with enough force to shatter a window.  But then I thought about five year olds I have known, and reconsidered this position.  So now I think 3 is the lie, because it seems like the kind of thing you would spare your friends, assuming you liked them. 
Should have gone with your first impression.  The lie is that I encouraged him to do so.  I wanted to see what it looks like.  A breaking window, that is, not a lacerated nose.

Sorry 'Bagas, but either you're the oldest, or you don't have brothers.  I paid dearly for it, but not at my brother's hands.  My mom probably what kind of demon had switched its spawn with her at birth.  His lower spine circuitry eventually figured itself out when he was about 10. When we were in our 20's I apologised for all the rotten stuff I did to him as kids.  He doesn't seem to hold it against me...

I bet JL is giving thanks that Hero wasn't a boy.  Also, bedwetting is hilarious to 10 year old boys.  As long as it isn't happening to them.  Even better if its your mate's twit little brother who you can then torment.
Logged
If you desire peace, work for justice.

Ruta Bagas

  • Dr. Andretti
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 108
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 426
  • Is that a shiny ring?
    • View Profile
    • The World Is Lovely
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #50 on: May 22, 2008, 10:43:02 pm »

Actually I'm the youngest of three. I guess my brothers just had more class than I gave them credit for.

Ben-San

  • -=Ray=-
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 164
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1259
  • Two-Fisted Detective
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #51 on: May 22, 2008, 10:47:55 pm »

1: When I was young people mistook me for a girl.
2: I climbed to high places and leapt down on people shrieking "SPIDER ATTACK!"
3: For a while I played Hard Man's level of Mega Man 3 every morning before going to school
Logged

theinevitable

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 486
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12139
    • View Profile
    • tweet tweet fun fun
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #52 on: May 22, 2008, 10:54:36 pm »

yeah, my mom is only now realizing how well we all got along.
Logged
Social pressures exist
And if you think about them all of the time
You're gonna find that your head's been kicked in
You're gonna do it all for the grind

Carlos del Vaca

  • The Mayor
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1316
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5007
  • Greetings from Banana Town
    • View Profile
    • bigfool.com
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #53 on: May 22, 2008, 11:02:11 pm »

Going way back, #2 is my lie.  I did hang out on that roof often--it was right out my bedroom window.  Never fell off of it though.  I figured that would be my emergency escape if the house was on fire, and I wondered if I could get down without hurting myself, but fortunately had the good sense not to try it.
Logged
My friends call me the Mayor.
My enemies don't call me anything.  'Cuz they're all dead.

Doc

  • Growing Cucumbers of Impressive Dimensions
  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1408
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5017
  • an emergency backup pug
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #54 on: May 22, 2008, 11:16:55 pm »

3: For a while I played Hard Man's level of Mega Man 3 every morning before going to school
I'm going with this one, mainly because I desperately want the 'spider attack' one to be true.

Took me a while to come up with any but...
1: When I was five I used to use 'jumping Jerusalem' as a general purpose expletive without at all connecting it to all the bible stuff they kept telling us about.
2: I have never broken any bones but I did go through this period of falling off things where I managed to either concuss or badly wind myself at least three times over a period of a couple of months.
3: I attended 5 schools in 3 different cities by the time I was in grade 6.
Logged
Inev: 'A lot of things are ridiculous if you think about them long enough, you know?'

jay-ell

  • Den Mother
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 407
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7869
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #55 on: May 22, 2008, 11:38:26 pm »

1: When I was young people mistook me for a girl.
2: I climbed to high places and leapt down on people shrieking "SPIDER ATTACK!"
3: For a while I played Hard Man's level of Mega Man 3 every morning before going to school


I don't have a guess, but #2 made me giggle audibly. 
Logged
"I always hear 'punch me in the face' when you're speaking. But it's usually subtext." -- Martin Freeman as John Watson

Ben-San

  • -=Ray=-
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 164
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1259
  • Two-Fisted Detective
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #56 on: May 22, 2008, 11:47:23 pm »

I'm going with this one, mainly because I desperately want the 'spider attack' one to be true.


You have not guessed the lie.

Of Doc's list, I am guessing 3 is the lie although all are quite believable.
Logged

Doc

  • Growing Cucumbers of Impressive Dimensions
  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1408
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5017
  • an emergency backup pug
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #57 on: May 23, 2008, 12:11:04 am »

Of Doc's list, I am guessing 3 is the lie although all are quite believable.

Ben-San is right, though only because I attended the same school twice over two different periods.
I'm going to go with the looking like a girl as your lie, as surely that could never happen to a two fisted detective (but mainly because I'm still rooting for the spider thing).
Logged
Inev: 'A lot of things are ridiculous if you think about them long enough, you know?'

Ben-San

  • -=Ray=-
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 164
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1259
  • Two-Fisted Detective
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #58 on: May 23, 2008, 12:40:53 am »

No, the spider thing is the lie - I never did that, my sister did it to me.
Logged

Doc

  • Growing Cucumbers of Impressive Dimensions
  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1408
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5017
  • an emergency backup pug
    • View Profile
Re: Grade School Confidential
« Reply #59 on: May 23, 2008, 01:20:16 am »

and suddenly the world is a little colder, the sun shines a little less bright on this sad, sad man.
Logged
Inev: 'A lot of things are ridiculous if you think about them long enough, you know?'
Pages: 1 2 3 [4] 5 6   Go Up