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[jough]

I was thinking that it may be nice to have an "official" Achewood FAQ here for new readers to catch-up quickly.

So I'm going to make a sticky thread starting next week with some basic Achewood info, but I'm probably not the best person to answer a lot of questions, since I've only been reading the strip for about nine months.

In this thread I'd like to propose questions that a n00bie would need answered.  If you can answer your own questions you get bonus points.

I'd want to break it up into categories:

Main Characters
Supporting Characters
Plots/Storylines
Recurring Themes
The Mysterious Chris Onstad
Articles/Essays/Interviews
Books and Merchandise
Catch-Phrases

If anyone can think of any other categories please reply.  I'm hoping people can suggest at least 10 questions that could be answered in the FAQ thread.

I'll start by proposing ten questions about "The Mysterious Chris Onstad"

1. Who writes and draws Achewood?
2. How old is Chris?
3. How can I contact him?
4. Is he married?
5. What tools does he use to create Achewood?
6. Is Achewood only available on the web?
7. What does Chris do for a living?
8. Does Chris have formal art training?
9. Where did Chris go to school?
10. Why is Chris such a dick?

Feel free to amend my questions with questions of your own.

[V-Adore]

A few questions that occur:

Main Characters:

1a) What species is everyone? (For really stupid people or raw n00bies or both. Because it's been asked so often.)

1b) What breed of cat is Ray?
(EDIT: He is, of course, an American Curl. Not a Scottish Fold.

Stuff about background might also be good but is hard to phrase in question form.

Books/Merchandising:

1) What's the advantage of actually shilling for the books instead of just reading Achewood online?
(EDIT: The ideal answer would involve citation of bonus material, having all the strips convenient to flip through, and so on.)

2) So, what is the turnaround time on merchandise, anyway?

Catch-Phrases:

1) What's the saddest thing?

2) How many euphemisms for genitalia has Onstad created, anyway?

(Edited because I decided to answer some of my questions.)

[CortJstr]

Q. Where did "What we need more of is science" come from?
A. So far it's only appeared on the shirt. While it was never in the strip it's just something Roast Beef would say.

Q. So what's the deal with The Underground? Where is it?
A. The Underground is a community made up of real and stuffed animals. They have doctors, bookstores, restaurants, and everything else that humans have. There have been hints from Onstad that it's located in or accessed via the sewer system but lately it seems to be far too large for that. One theory is that The Underground is all over but as humans we just don't notice it because we aren't supposed to. This is similar to the Somebody Else's Problem field in the Hitchhiker's Trilogy. Another theory is that it's a comic and we're thinking about it too much.

Q. So Ray has a record deal from Sony/Columbia. Didn't they notice he's a cat?
A. Apparently not. It could be that part of his deal with Satan makes people just not notice his catness. Or perhaps he actually signed with The Underground's version of Sony in which case all their acts are animals.

According to Onstad this got asked a lot:

Q. Is Philippe prounounced Fil-eep or fi-leep-ay?
A. Fil-eep

You should be all the characters' full names and break them down by stuffed/real animals.

[wombat]

Q. What kind of dog does the mysterious Onstad own?

A. A dachshund.

This is useful information because there is a dachshund reference or two in the strips, not just because I am fixated on mammals.

[side_show]

Q. What kind of people read Achewood

A. Dirty, sexy geeks.

[AugustWest]

Q. What kind of dog does the mysterious Onstad own?

A. A dachshund.

This is useful information because there is a dachshund reference or two in the strips, not just because I am fixated on mammals.

Hey!  I have a dachshund.

He's getting neutered tomorrow.  Perhaps Ray will console him on his loss.

[wombat]

Oh, and his dachshund is a girl.  I am relieved to report that I no longer have any of the other information that I dug up about her, though, as I think this is a sign of good mental health.  I could probably remember it if I kept thinking about it, but I'm going to try not to.

[V-Adore]

Wow, this is going to be the best Onstad's Dog FAQ ever.

[CortJstr]

Oscar could totally take Onstad's dachshund.

Weiner Dog Thunderdome.

[wombat]

Wow, this is going to be the best Onstad's Dog FAQ ever.

Well someone else pitch in... it's not my fault I can derail almost anything into an animal discussion.

[V-Adore]

Wow, this is going to be the best Onstad's Dog FAQ ever.

Well someone else pitch in... it's not my fault I can derail almost anything into an animal discussion.

Honestly, it's cool. In an odd sort of way, I kind of like the idea of a whole section on Onstad's dog. It adds... y'know, flavor, albeit "Single White Female"-level flavor.

[wombat]

OK fine, in penance I try to answer Jough's other questions, and you will all wish I stuck to dachshunds.

1. Who writes and draws Achewood?
This guy, the Mysterious Chris Onstad, former messageboard tyrant and heartthrob to millions, or maybe dozens.

2. How old is Chris?
Like in his late 20s.  I'll get back to you when I repeat the Internet stalking that revealed what year he graduated and we can guess from there.

3. How can I contact him?
chris@achewood.com.  Don't tell him I sent you, I have the feeling he thinks I am a little peculiar.

4. Is he married?
Yes, to Elizabeth known as Liz, a fan of otters. Why do you want to know?

5. What tools does he use to create Achewood?
Band saw, particle accelerator, and pruning shears.

6. Is Achewood only available on the web?
Apparently some lucky people can read it on paper, I am guessing somewhere on the west coast.

7. What does Chris do for a living?
Trains dachshunds for the circus.

8. Does Chris have formal art training?
I think he says no.  I can't think of a funny answer to this that isn't rude.

9. Where did Chris go to school?
Stanford, where, I am assured by a friend native to the west coast, they aren't as snobby as at Harvard, the Stanford of the East.

10. Why is Chris such a dick?
He was a perfectly sweet and rational person until the madness of the Dumbrella messageboard, and we should all feel terribly guilty for what we have done.

[ferocious j]

10. Why is Chris such a dick?
He was a perfectly sweet and rational person until the madness of the Dumbrella messageboard, and we should all feel terribly guilty for what we have done.

DING

Thank you

Please drive through

[wombat]

Honestly, it's cool. In an odd sort of way, I kind of like the idea of a whole section on Onstad's dog. It adds... y'know, flavor, albeit "Single White Female"-level flavor.

Then maybe you do want to know that the dachshund's registered AKC name is Tanglewoods Bodicea.

[V-Adore]

Honestly, it's cool. In an odd sort of way, I kind of like the idea of a whole section on Onstad's dog. It adds... y'know, flavor, albeit "Single White Female"-level flavor.

Then maybe you do want to know that the dachshund's registered AKC name is Tanglewoods Bodicea.

... Tanglewoods Bodicea.

Best. Dog. Name. EVER.