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What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit? - Nabu

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Author Topic: Red Delicious Apples  (Read 3168 times)

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pmcd9

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Red Delicious Apples
« on: February 26, 2010, 03:41:00 pm »

At best only 2/3 true.  Discuss.
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side_show

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #1 on: February 26, 2010, 04:50:43 pm »

Yeah, they are never that great.  Sometimes they are so dry and pulpy that I'm disgusted and toss one out half eaten.  When I was a kid, I used to love them though... I used to day dream of being Snow White, and these apples were the perfect, deep red sort I deemed necessary for eternal sleep.

Fuji apples are interesting locally - we get two kinds at the store - the always hard, crisp, firm, brownish ones that are almost always juicy and delicious, and the pale variety, often covered in an odd styrofoam netting, which are often soft, pulpy and dry...  These are clearly two different types of apples, yet they're both sold under the same name... Terrible.

Also, meet the Grapple an un-godly apple that has been injected with a highly artificial smelling grape flavour.  When I first saw these at the store, my question was "why would you ruin a perfectly good apple by adding grape flavouring to it?"  Bleh.  I think this should be a question in their FAQ section.  Also "Who the hell buys these?"  Who has ever thought "you know what's wrong with my apple?  It doesn't taste like a grape!" 
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Choop

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #2 on: February 26, 2010, 05:04:14 pm »

when i was in college, a course i took called Cosmologies had a weekend trip to a zen retreat way out in the sticks. a two-mile hike up the mountain led to a sparse apple orchard, the trees bursting with macintoshes and granny smiths. the cool, stiff winds rustling across the grass; the fresh juice running down my chin; this after 24 hours of a no-talking rule; it was a culmination of insanity that brought intense calm. so i guess it worked?
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lprkn

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #3 on: February 26, 2010, 05:05:33 pm »

Million to one apple is half red, half green

My 2 cents: unripe, green apples can't be beat (except by diarrhea).
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jay-ell

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #4 on: February 26, 2010, 05:06:49 pm »

I grew up near an apple orchard that grew Red and Golden Delicious.

All I have to say is that those of you who don't like Red Delicious have never had one right off the tree, as God intended.
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Drygioni

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #5 on: February 26, 2010, 05:29:47 pm »

I used to apple scrump next doors tree as a kid, was fantastic.

Nothing better than a proper apple.
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CortJstr

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #6 on: February 26, 2010, 05:36:03 pm »

* Delicious apples are always too soft for my tastes. After tasting the samples at the farmers' markets I'm now firmly a Honeycrisp man with Fujis as my backup as Honeycrisps have a mockingly short season around here. The occasional Mutsu is nice, too.

And a Granny Smith on a stick coated in caramel is one of life's great joys.


I used to apple scrump next doors tree as a kid, was fantastic.

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greenkoolayd

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #7 on: February 26, 2010, 07:19:44 pm »

* Delicious apples are always too soft for my tastes. After tasting the samples at the farmers' markets I'm now firmly a Honeycrisp man with Fujis as my backup as Honeycrisps have a mockingly short season around here. The occasional Mutsu is nice, too.

And a Granny Smith on a stick coated in caramel is one of life's great joys.


Things I Only Know Because of Red Dwarf for $100 please, Alex.

hell and damn yes!  easily the best apple(bluemoon told me that they were invented in minnesota).

speaking of produce, i dont understand why asian pears are so damn expensive($1.49/each!).

also, if you love mangos, this gadget works like a charm.
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wombat

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #8 on: February 26, 2010, 08:16:21 pm »

All I have to say is that those of you who don't like Red Delicious have never had one right off the tree, as God intended.

This is an intriguing point. The supermarket Red Delicious is an abomination. But there's so much other supermarket produce that is an abomination compared to what it should really be like.  Hmm.
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jaydub

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #9 on: February 26, 2010, 10:10:04 pm »

also, if you love mangos, this gadget works like a charm.
I got one of those recently and my mango consumption has gone up geometrically.
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Arachno-capitalist

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #10 on: February 26, 2010, 10:28:22 pm »

also, if you love mangos, this gadget works like a charm.
Does it really have to be shaped like that?
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pmcd9

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #11 on: February 26, 2010, 10:35:19 pm »

I'm now firmly a Honeycrisp man

Had one today.  May have another.
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jaydub

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #12 on: February 26, 2010, 10:56:29 pm »

Does it really have to be shaped like that?
Mangos really do have a weirdly shaped pit.  I frequently make suggestive gestures with that tool at my wife in the kitchen.
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lprkn

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #13 on: February 27, 2010, 01:59:05 am »

My fear (inescapable mental picture) is that some enterprising soul will make suggestive gestures at himself.
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KeithHernandez

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Re: Red Delicious Apples
« Reply #14 on: February 27, 2010, 03:46:13 am »

I am strongly in the Honeycrisp, Fuji, Pink Lady- the same hardness as the other ones, maybe a bit more tartly (is that how you say that?)- camp.  I choose my food by texture mainly- thanks marlboro!
« Last Edit: February 27, 2010, 05:25:41 am by KeithHernandez »
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