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[wombat]

Really good status updates that satirize these Facebook memes almost make them all worthwhile.

[Carlos del Vaca]

I have started posting the comment "#vaguebooking" when someone posts an annoyingly vague status update.  Today's offender was "Seriously?"

[pmcd9]

I have started posting the comment "#vaguebooking" when someone posts an annoyingly vague status update.  Today's offender was "Seriously?"

Oh that is good.  Very good sir.

[wombat]

Satire of the day:

WARNING : IF SOMEONE COMES TO YOUR FRONT DOOR, ASKS YOU TO REMOVE YOUR CLOTHING , THROW YOUR ARMS UP IN THE AIR AND START DANCING, I BEG YOU , DO NOT DO THIS. ITS A SCAM. I WISH SOMEONE HAD WARNED ME ABOUT THIS YESTERDAY, I FEEL STUPID NOW !!!! PLEASE COPY & PASTE TO SAVE SOMEONE ELSE THE TROUBLE. THANK YOU AND HAVE A GOOD DAY !!

The all caps is a nice touch.

[jay-ell]

Got this from my brother-in-law the other day.

Which side of the fence?
If you ever wondered which side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!   
If a Republican doesn't like guns, he doesn’t buy one.
If a Democrat doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.     

If a Republican is a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat meat.
If a Democrat is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.     

If a Republican is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a Democrat is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.     

If a Republican is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A Democrat wonders who is going to take care of him.     

If a Republican doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Democrats demand that those they don't like be shut down.     

If a Republican is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A Democrat non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced.

If a Republican decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it..
A Democrat demands that the rest of us pay for his.     

If a Republican reads this, he'll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh.
A Democrat will delete it because he's "offended".     

Well, I forwarded it.

I especially like the theoreticals. "IF a Republican is a homosexual...IF a Republican doesn't like guns..." I mean, maybe an out, gay Republican *might* just quietly lead his life, but since openly gay Republicans are scarcer than the Easter Bunny I guess we'll never know, will we?

[jay-ell]

This is just as full of stereotypes and prejudice as the previous version, but...I couldn't help myself.

Which side of the fence?
If you ever wondered which side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!   

If a Democrat likes guns, he buys one legally and keeps its registration up to date.
If a Replublican likes guns, he doesn’t buy one, he buys twenty, and then complains that he had to wait 24 hours and fill out some paperwork to get them.

If a Republican is a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat meat.
If a Democrat is a vegetarian, he volunteers his time to improve the environment and make the food supply safer for people and more humane for animals.

If a Republican is homosexual, he pretends he isn't.
If a Democrat is homosexual, he is confident enough to expect others not to discriminate against him.     

If a Democrat is down-and-out, he applies for assistance from the government, thankful that he paid his taxes during more prosperous times.
If a Republican is down-and-out, he becomes a Democrat.

If a Republican doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels. He turns to Fox News, where he can watch other talk show hosts berate and insult the show he just switched away from.
Democrats demand freedom of the press and an independent media that provides news and information from both sides of the story instead of just one.     

If a Republican is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church any more than necessary to keep up appearances.
A Democrat non-believer wants the freedom to stay home on Sundays without being harassed for his non-belief.

If a Republican decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may be lucky enough to have a college degree so he can qualify for a job that provides it.
A Democrat offers to pay higher takes so that those who can't afford it and don't have jobs that provide it can still be covered.

If a Republican reads this, he'll probably delete it because he's offended.
A Democrat will delete it because he knows better than to send stupid shit like this to his family and friends.     

[jay-ell]

The second asshole is me. Not that I believe that shit, mind you -- some of my best friends are Republicans -- I just wanted to experiment with what it would look like from the other side of the same distorted lens.

Asshole-ish? Yeah. But it made me feel better, and I know y'all won't judge me for it.

[jay-ell]

My SIL posted this on Facebook. It's a gem:

Lets all play a drinking game. Whenever we read or hear the word "economy" we drink. We'll be dead by morning.

[Nabubrush]

Don't forget alcohol is a depressant. Much like the economy.

[greenkoolayd]

Don't forget alcohol is a depressant. Much like the economy.

a lot of people add redbull to their alcoholic beverages so they can be hyper and slanty at the same time.  what would be an economic equivalent to that?

[greenkoolayd]

should i?

[jay-ell]

a lot of people add redbull to their alcoholic beverages so they can be hyper and slanty at the same time.  what would be an economic equivalent to that?

Stagflation.

[miles]

If a Republican is homosexual, he pretends he isn't.
If a Democrat is homosexual, he is confident enough to expect others not to discriminate against him.     

If a Democrat is down-and-out, he applies for assistance from the government, thankful that he paid his taxes during more prosperous times.
If a Republican is down-and-out, he becomes a Democrat.

You nailed these two.

I remember after my very economically conservative friend got married and had kids he had to accept some federal assistance to pay for school. Not just loans, but grants. Free money! He'd never had a high paying job so he had paid very little in taxes up to that point. We're good enough friends that I could ask him how he could justify it, and he just kinda shrugged. But yeah, he got a little softer on social assistance after that.

[Nabubrush]

We got one chowderhead at work who loves to hoot and laugh about "the 99ers" (the folks who are going to suck at the gov't unemployment teat for 99 weeks). Every meeting we have, he jabbers about it for the five minutes before the meeting starts. Well, we always get these young engineers fresh out of college, too - an as you can imagine, they have taken a very different path to get here than the folks (like me) who worked their way up through the manual labor ranks. So this older guy is doing his little 99er giggle, and this young guy. totally guilelessly, starts talking about how he thought unemployment is great and how it really helped him out when he was going to college and needed to study and couldn't hold a job. It was so awesome to see this other guy confronted with a co-worker sort of putting it in his face, but just as nice as he could be about it.

[Nabubrush]

I think he got laid off, but I'm not sure. He was a pretty entitled-feeling little shit, so it's not like his nose was to the grindstone or anything. Having said all that, he's a productive member of society now, so I guess it worked the way it's supposed to, more or less.