The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

@achewood Would Star Trek have had the same gravitas if Spock had been named Vince?

Pages: [1] 2 3   Go Down

Author Topic: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next  (Read 8137 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

pmcd9

  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« on: November 20, 2013, 01:24:36 am »
This is mostly directed at Upworthy, but for all of the websites who have made a trend of sensationalistic misleading headlines, I give you a resounding FUCK YOU!
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

miles

  • Stinkfist
  • VIP
  • Ocular Shenanigans
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 10030
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 3476
    • View Profile
    • Last.fm
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #1 on: November 20, 2013, 04:00:20 am »
I hate that site. Every time I go there a subscription solicitation pops up and basically says 'if you believe in goodness and want to end all war then give us your email address! If you are a heartless fuckwad then go ahead and just click through to the site, and then die slow fucker.' Or something like that.
Logged
Order is indeed the dream of man, but chaos, which is only another word for dumb, blind, witless chance, is still the law of nature. - Wallace Stegner

pmcd9

  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #2 on: November 20, 2013, 04:15:05 am »
Quote from: miles on November 20, 2013, 04:00:20 am
I hate that site. Every time I go there a subscription solicitation pops up

Oh yeah, I forgot about that. EVERY fuck*ng TIME!
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

Choop

  • Mod Squad
  • LAZARUS, Tasseled Loafer of the Powerful
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1010
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 4260
  • www dot at rick and morty dot com www
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #3 on: November 20, 2013, 06:29:07 am »
i hadn't heard of that site until this thread. i happened upon this parody a moment ago, which means parody is now lapping me online. i used to be able to stay ahead of it, but i guess i'm getting old.
Logged
Nobody exists on purpose; nobody belongs anywhere; everybody's gonna die. Come watch TV?

wombat

  • English-Speaking Pizza
  • Mod Squad
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 644
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12493
  • Yeah man, these are pugs, not some fuck*ng lolcat.
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #4 on: November 20, 2013, 02:08:23 pm »
I just saw that too and I don't see why it's supposed to be funny. Maybe the problem is that Upworthy headlines already sound like parodies of themselves.
Logged
What is this, the fuckin' Algonquin Round Table or some shit?  - Nabu

If you're going to change your life then you have to change it every day, not just the days the world isn't taking a shit on you. -Doc

Carlos del Vaca

  • The Mayor
  • VIP
  • Philippe is standing on it.
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 1316
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 5007
  • Greetings from Banana Town
    • View Profile
    • bigfool.com
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #5 on: November 20, 2013, 02:19:03 pm »
I know one easy trick for avoiding such come-ons!
Logged
My friends call me the Mayor.
My enemies don't call me anything.  'Cuz they're all dead.

pmcd9

  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #6 on: November 20, 2013, 09:06:15 pm »
Quote from: Carlos del Vaca on November 20, 2013, 02:19:03 pm
I know one easy trick for avoiding such come-ons!

Oh I don't click on those links. At least not anymore.
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

miles

  • Stinkfist
  • VIP
  • Ocular Shenanigans
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 10030
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 3476
    • View Profile
    • Last.fm
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #7 on: November 20, 2013, 09:19:48 pm »
Try this one WEIRD trick to lose belly fat.
Logged
Order is indeed the dream of man, but chaos, which is only another word for dumb, blind, witless chance, is still the law of nature. - Wallace Stegner

dejavroom

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • -=Ray=-
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 165
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1362
  • confused and angry
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #8 on: November 20, 2013, 11:18:22 pm »
Oh, man, that copy is so deliciously tacky. Do you think humans write those "headlines", or maybe they outsourced the job to bots?
Logged
The absurdity is veiled by the poetic charm with which the poet invests it.

pmcd9

  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #9 on: November 20, 2013, 11:41:44 pm »
Viralnova is another one that has taken up the UpWorthy mantle. I just read this headline on Facebook "A Love Letter was Found on this 500 year old body. Nothing Could Prepare me for What it Said."
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

dejavroom

  • Writer's Workshoppers
  • -=Ray=-
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 165
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 1362
  • confused and angry
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #10 on: November 21, 2013, 01:53:50 am »
They're getting some serious flair there, yeah.

Logged
The absurdity is veiled by the poetic charm with which the poet invests it.

pmcd9

  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #11 on: November 21, 2013, 02:53:31 am »
This is definitely a subset of Shit my _____ says. Or at least these headlines are designed for that group of people.
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

pmcd9

  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #12 on: November 30, 2013, 10:51:31 pm »
"What This Man Found In A Bag Of Mulch Will Blow Your Mind. What He Did With It Will Melt Your Heart"
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.

ianmalcolm2

  • Showbiz
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 129
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 206
  • the persian inversion
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #13 on: December 01, 2013, 12:01:22 am »
The super-elderly of the future will have no need for their brains. The newly sentient Upworthy-CandyCrush combine will create botnets out of senior's homes, and spread its gradual control over the youth one triple-forwarded email at a time.
Logged
Nothing else I could say would make more sense given what I own and what I am doing at this moment.

pmcd9

  • Moderator
  • Dude since Knucklehead times
  • *
  • Tiny cans of Dr Pepper: 608
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Posts: 12778
  • The Kid is up to no good
    • View Profile
Re: You'll Never Believe What Happens Next
« Reply #14 on: December 01, 2013, 01:31:11 am »
That sounds plausible.
Logged
I hope I never have to refer to a scone in spoken conversation.
Pages: [1] 2 3   Go Up
« previous next »