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Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

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Author Topic: Movies you HATE  (Read 22721 times)

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Mantonio

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« Reply #45 on: October 27, 2005, 05:53:17 am »

Quote from: "side_show"
Hey, scroll down on the link and check out the message board topic titles:

Quote from: "User:swayzesDoucheBag"
Better Tag Lines For This Diaper Taco Of A Movie


Beautiful.


Quote from: "IMBD folks"
Road House II: Floppy Breasts and Milwaukee's Best
RH2: Cybernetic Klansmen from the Future
Road House 2: No, seriously
Road House2: Oxycotin-Meth Superdrughouse and Bait Shoppe
Road House 2: Boat House


Fuck Snakes on a Plane, this long awaited sequel to Road House is the movie to see in '06.
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aparrish

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« Reply #46 on: October 27, 2005, 01:59:31 pm »

Let me tell you about a bad movie.  This bad movie is called What Dreams May Come.  In this movie, Cuba Gooding Jr. helps Robin Williams rescue his wife from hell.  The movie mistakes lavish (yet cliche) set pieces for emotional resonance, and psychobabble for dialogue.  There is no coherent plot.  The acting was wincingly bad, like I had to avert my eyes from the screen, but I can't tell if that was the director's fault, or the actors' fault, or just the fact that the screenplay was so goddamn terrible.  Worst of all, I saw it with a bunch of people who thought it was brilliant so I had to pretend it had some redeeming features.  "It was ... good," I said.  "Very colorful!  Robin Williams was ... a ... famous person!"

Oh yeah, and Robin Williams plays himself as a 20-year-old youth in a flashback.  I have elaborate machinery for suspending my disbelief - pulleys,  reinforced rope, etc. - but that shit was unhoistable.

Regarding movies that I expected to hate but actually liked: In Her Shoes.  I was sure it was going to be trash after seeing the trailer, but it turned out to be a skillfully-made, well-written movie.  Never schmaltzy, never over-the-top.  Unlike other chick flicks it actually earned its emotional impact.  This has been movie minute with aparrish.
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Doc

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« Reply #47 on: October 27, 2005, 02:36:02 pm »

I have very few movies I absolutely hate, I can come to terms with most movies on some level but I will throw out a couple that left me seriously freaked out by the end of them:

Tape - It's got Uma Thurman and Ethan Hawke in it, I only mention this because I didn't notice it hit the movies over here so I don't know how noticable it was over there, but I caught it on dvd and it was just all dialogue but so freaking tense. Not sure how it would stand up to re-watching, but I enjoyed it my first time through.

Mysterious skin - I got dragged along to this one at an indie theatre near me and just can't decide whether it's actually a powerful movie or just exploitative. I went to see it with two people who just talk all through movies though and we didn't say a goddamn word to each other until 5 minutes after we left the theatre.


Oh and Sin City was the bizzledybomb as was Big giraffe, but then I've got a soft spot for old time storytelling (even if it's not burton's best). Kung fu Hustle was a bunch of fun too if you're into that sort of thing.
Anyone seen mirrormask?
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Beatrice

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« Reply #48 on: October 27, 2005, 02:52:32 pm »

Quote from: "V-Adore"
Quote from: "jough"
Oh, dude, Meet the Parents was fuck*ng cinematic GOLD compared to its sequel, "Meet the Fockers" which landed with a bigger thud than Jim O'Brien did.

Oh, my God. Meet the Fockers sucked SOUR FROG ASS. We saw it last year as a family Christmas outing because there were no other movies available -- my omens of terribleness totally ignored. Ignored, I tell you!


mine too!  are... we... related?!?

V-Adore

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« Reply #49 on: October 27, 2005, 03:33:59 pm »

Quote from: "Beatrice"
Quote from: "V-Adore"
Quote from: "jough"
Oh, dude, Meet the Parents was fuck*ng cinematic GOLD compared to its sequel, "Meet the Fockers" which landed with a bigger thud than Jim O'Brien did.

Oh, my God. Meet the Fockers sucked SOUR FROG ASS. We saw it last year as a family Christmas outing because there were no other movies available -- my omens of terribleness totally ignored. Ignored, I tell you!


mine too!  are... we... related?!?

Well, you sure don't type like my mom...
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Golfhaus

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« Reply #50 on: October 27, 2005, 05:32:02 pm »

You guys sure watch a lot of movies. I've watched approximately three movies since 2000. I don't have a good enough sample set to start ranking.
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miles

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« Reply #51 on: October 27, 2005, 07:02:10 pm »

Yeah, Mirror Mask, anyone?  Should I waste my money on it?
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yu-huang

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« Reply #52 on: December 01, 2005, 01:11:59 am »

Oh, man, movies I hate, I hate so many movies, I should just let it go but I can't. When some of them get praised, which is not uncommon, I hate them all the more.

Batman Begins. I read somewhere some dude saying it was "neorealistic". I gave this really weird loud nervous laugh in the office.

Con Air. But then again everybody hates it.

The Star Wars movies. Requiem for a Dream.

A History of Violence. Stay with me here people, A History of Violence was like a really loud fart during the burial of the king's son.
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jough

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« Reply #53 on: December 01, 2005, 01:28:58 am »

Batman Begins was very true to the "Dark Knight" reinvention of Batman in the 80s and early 90s.  It's the first Batman movie to "get it right."

However, if you don't like Batman, or superhero movies, then yeah, maybe you should've taken a pass on that one.

You don't like any of the Star Wars films, not even the original one?  If so, pretty much any opinion you have hereafter is suspect.  The first Star Wars, and even more so the Empire Strikes Back, are basically like treasure.  Do you lack whimsy in your soul?

Requiem for a Dream is not an easy movie to love, but it's really well made and when I heard someone describe it as "harrowing" I had to nod in agreement.

Con Air is a stupid movie by design.  To say you hate it is like saying that you like to breathe air.  No shit.

A History of Violence was pretty good, if not entirely unpredictable (read: mostly predictable).  However, the characters were fairly well drawn-out and who among us doesn't like to see William Hurt take a bullet to the head? I ask you!

yu-huang

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« Reply #54 on: December 01, 2005, 02:52:05 am »

Man, was that the fuck*ng wrong foot or *what*? =)

But basically, yeah, I'm just grumpy and I hate a *lot* of movies. What about "Unbreakable", what do you think of "Unbreakable" as a super-hero movie?

(You have me on the "bullet in William Hurt's brain" scenario, though; that was a very nice scene to watch... ^^)
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jough

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« Reply #55 on: December 01, 2005, 07:11:18 am »

I think I mentioned how much Unbreakable sucked earlier in this thread.

WAY TO READ THE THREADS TO WHICH YOU CONTRIBUTE, DOOD

Also, you should not back down from your opinion no matter how wrong you may be.  Had you reversed yourself, the Drill Sgt. would have beaten you more severely.

You DO love the Virgin Mary, don't you?

yu-huang

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« Reply #56 on: December 01, 2005, 08:02:25 am »

Oh, I didn't back down, I just restated my position in a friendlier manner. I still think the movies I mentioned are not even "movies" by my definition of the term, and could, *maybe*, be arsed to discuss why and how at length...

But now I don't want to, because I hadn't realised you were *that* mad, and I don't appreciate the fact that you chose to so openly ignore my attempt to, you know, take things easy, and tried instead a quick put-down (maybe a bit too quick). You are a bit of a prick in my eyes now, isn't that sad?
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AlohaDawg

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« Reply #57 on: December 01, 2005, 08:11:57 am »

Yu Huang

Take a pill or something. Then read as many old threads as you can.

Once you've caught up enough to understand the wonder that is Jough, feel free to front out the big man if you think you can hang in.
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yu-huang

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« Reply #58 on: December 01, 2005, 10:11:03 am »

Dude, I'm cool, and so on. I hope Jough is, too. Wasn't this a bit... unnecessary, or something, to begin with? Don't wear a cape, and don't get mad on the internet about movies.
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arkabee

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« Reply #59 on: December 01, 2005, 02:17:17 pm »

Quote from: "yu-huang"
Dude, I'm cool, and so on. I hope Jough is, too. Wasn't this a bit... unnecessary, or something, to begin with? Don't wear a cape, and don't get mad on the internet about movies.


jough is just a bored prick.

ignore him.

your opinions of movies are validated.
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