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[pmcd9]

Paul, people did mention that the bird is likely stuffed with the No-Doz.

Yes, yes they did.  I overlooked that part.  I'm not convinced, but it could be the case.  Still, i'm on the edge of my seat awaiting what happens next.  I'm on the edge of the seat.

~Paul

[cashlock]

Where are these Safeways located ?  I'd like to know their going rate on a pound of turkey ....

There are a ton of Safeways in the South Bay area (San Jose, Silicon Valley).  The only competition seems to be Albertsons.  On a more related note I was in Bakersfield briefly last weekend and am very disappointed that I missed the GOF.

[Ben-San]

The turkey cannot possibly be No-Doz-stuffed, at least by GOF staff, as its hygienic anti-tampering paper strip seal is still intact. I imagine that had it been purchased prestuffed it would be listed as Roast Turkey (No-Doz Stfng) or some such.

[sensate]

Cans for thedudeabides85, Emergent_C, and Drew. They know why.

This site (http://sorabji.com) has made a fetish of receipts (it also has much other wonderful content). I know Onstad must read it.

The relentless downmarketitude of the strip is inspirational. No pretense, no fashion, no nothing. Only merit. Either you got it or you don't, that's all. Especially with regard to Ray, for whom ridiculous money made Blue Nun dirty, this is especially wonderful.

And I reply so late that no one will ever read this post.

(and I'm so stupid, I can't insert a hyperlink)

[miles]

The image of a GOF-based elementary-school math worksheet fills me with delight. We could even expand it to elementary physics: "The Toronto Man Machine, weighing 6.2 kg, is running east at approximately 25 m/s when Furious Jacob Forsyth, weighing 4.7 kg and running north at 32 m/s, collides with him. Find their final velocity and the direction of their combined motion. Assume a perfectly elastic collision and that neither cat loses mass from the resulting face-ripping."

My sister teaches third grade at an elementary school in the area.  I'll tell her she needn't worry about planning any more math lessons this year, or any year for that matter.  I'll plan the curriculum.

Except, I wouldn't have known what a perfectly elastic collision was in elementary school.  At least I don't think I would have.  And I tested above average in every subject area.

[L.J. Anonymous]

perhaps the Brandy has been spiked by no doz ?

[Factitious]

There are multiple Safeways in Palo Alto. I don't know about Bakersfield for sure, but a Safeway there would not surprise me.

[Golfhaus]

and I'm just imagining getting the next issue of Southpark Magazine (it's a magazine basically based on a rich area of charlotte. I dont know what it's ever about... but southpark is "that rich neighborhood with the nice mall". the magazine is owned by the same company as the newspaper) and having a picture of me, and a comment about being obsessed with an online comic about alive stuffed animals.

Southpark Mall is pretty nice. Generally speaking, any mall with an art store (as opposed to a store that sells art supplies) is probably in a good way. The only malls I've been in that had one were Southpark and the Mall of America.

Convincing the SO to move with me to Charlotte is Part Of The Plan For Me.

[theinevitable]

yeah...
it only gets better, too.
that mall is hardcore.

now that I'll be moving away from Charlotte, I'm realizing how much I love it. Damn. I'm going to spend the rest of my time hear buying paraphernalia (neighborhood theater t-shirt, cheerwine t-shirt, UNC t-shirt, cds by local bands... etc.)

also: is it paraphernalia? the spellcheck changed it to that, but... there's an R in it? why?

[Hobot]

yeah...
it only gets better, too.
that mall is hardcore.

now that I'll be moving away from Charlotte, I'm realizing how much I love it. Damn. I'm going to spend the rest of my time hear buying paraphernalia (neighborhood theater t-shirt, cheerwine t-shirt, UNC t-shirt, cds by local bands... etc.)

also: is it paraphernalia? the spellcheck changed it to that, but... there's an R in it? why?

There was a girl at my high school (a boarding and day school) from North Carolina.  Whenever she went home to NC, she would bring back cases and cases of Cheerwine and sell it by the can or case to students.  It was a very popular and lucrative business venture on her part.  I'd like to say that she was raising the money to donate to charity, but I can't be sure.

Like the first "r" in February, the second "r" in paraphernalia is not pronounced by some people.  I know that there has been a thread about the proper pronunciation of February, so I am not going to give my opinion, but instead merely state that people say things differently.

[AugustWest]

I just discovered Diet Cheerwine about 6 months ago.  That stuff is tasty and it has hell of caffeine.

[wombat]

merely state that people say things differently.

It would do much for World Peace and so forth if more people would leave it at that, when such issues arise.

[CortJstr]

yeah...
it only gets better, too.
that mall is hardcore.

now that I'll be moving away from Charlotte, I'm realizing how much I love it. Damn. I'm going to spend the rest of my time hear buying paraphernalia (neighborhood theater t-shirt, cheerwine t-shirt, UNC t-shirt, cds by local bands... etc.)

also: is it paraphernalia? the spellcheck changed it to that, but... there's an R in it? why?

I might still have my UNC Sucks t-shirt around somewhere if you're interested. Also: Tech Sucks

[Golfhaus]

Spoken like a Cavalier. Football teams in Florida, basketball teams in North Carolina, all can go take a long walk off a short pier.

[jough]

It would be better if people would pronounce words in English correctly.

We need something like the French Academy to make and ENFORCE rules about how words are supposed to be pronounced.  It's a New World Order, after all.  Conform, fuckers.