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[jay-ell]

I want to believe that the way you find the right career is by trying lots of different things. But so far none of those things are letting me try them. I really do think that part of it might be that I am so criminally bad at selling myself.

The older I get, the more I believe that the idea of "finding the right career" is a myth. Sure, there are people like Pedro or August who go to school for a thing, and then do that thing. But the vast majority of people I know have done a whole bunch of different things, sometimes related and sometimes not, and eventually either drifted into something they enjoy and stuck there or made an active decision to pursue some kind of schooling based on what they'd learned from the series of random jobs they'd already done.

I mean, I'm not old and I have had long periods of deliberate unemployment, but in the last fifteen years I've been a waitress, an administrative assistant (three times), a retail clerk (twice), a ballroom dance instructor, a blackjack dealer, a fast food grunt, a grad student, a freelance writer, and a stay-at-home mom. I'm really happy with my current job and I can't think of anything I'd rather be doing at this point in my life, but this job isn't going to fit forever and I have no problem moving on when the time comes.

On a slightly tangential note, what I know about myself now that I didn't in college is that I don't like doing the same thing every day, I prefer to work independently instead of collaboratively, and autonomy is extremely important to me -- which is why the thing I went to college for (secondary education) would have been a very, very poor fit. I am SO glad I didn't get a teaching fellowship.

[littlefallsmets]

Grad school, unless you're doing it for a defined career path you really want to follow through on, is for suckers.

Absolutely.

I am more sure of this than I am that the sun will come up tomorrow.

A super villain could put out the sun tomorrow, there is a minute chance of this.

The nature of the American higher education system being 83% a con, even Doctor Doom couldn't undo that shit.

[wombat]

the rules done changed.

This is exactly right.

In my case it wasn't my parents that encouraged me (my mom was so ignorant of the system that when I said I was leaving a research assistant job in a professor's lab for grad school, she said "Can't you just work your way up?") but rather my professors, who got jobs in my field when it was hundreds of times easier to get a job in my field. But it's the same deal. It's not that older people have no useful advice to give, but older people who say you should do what they did... they do not have a clue about how much times have changed.

[wombat]

Here's something that I've come to realize in the past few years -- It's better to look at the sort of tasks you like rather than the broad field of activity. 

This is so true. When I was in college, everyone who was good at math went into engineering, but when I asked them what an engineer did, none could answer the question. They could give a vague answer, but when I said "What will you do when you get to work in the morning and sit down at your desk?" none of them could say. It seemed like a really bad idea to pick a career where you couldn't answer that question.

And right now, oh god, I have this temporary job in an animal shelter which turns out to be 9/10ths sitting at a desk beating my head against computer software and answering emails. About 1/10 of the time I can sneak out and work with an actual dog. This is a very interesting field, but I would rather be cleaning up after the animals than doing the administrative tasks necessary to keep the behavior program running.

[theinevitable]

I would love this "do lots of different things" option but I do not understand how to do that. I do not know how to expand on that without whining.

[wombat]

Well, most people do those different things one at a time, so to start you only have to do one thing.

[jay-ell]

Go ahead and whine. It's what we're here for.

[miles]

The Field Museum is right near the football stadium. Lots of cool stuff, worth the money.

Lou Malnati's for pizza. And get one o' them Chicago dogs--I believe Hot Doug's is the joint most people recommend. We also went to Rick Bayless' Xoco and got expensive fancy-ass Mexican sandwiches. They were good.

Oh that does look pretty awesome.

Turns out Morrissey canceled his Chicago date (among a few others) to be with his mum who is ill. Poor guy. So now I have more time. My friend wants to go to Second City. Is that any good these days?

[AugustWest]

Sure, there are people like Pedro or August who go to school for a thing, and then do that thing. But the vast majority of people I know have done a whole bunch of different things, sometimes related and sometimes not,

Even within my broad field, I've done a whole bunch of different things, most of which are nothing like what I thought I'd be doing.

[theinevitable]

OK, clearly I tried so hard not to whine that I did not explain myself. I do not understand how to get different jobs to hire me, when I only have real experience serving coffee or ringing up groceries.  I have had opportunities to take different jobs that are similar to one of those two things, but they pay significantly less and do not offer health insurance.

For instance, I recently applied to a job which I consider myself perfectly suited for. It is a combo job-- my duties would be sitting at the front desk at the local NPR affiliate and assisting guests, but also working as an assistant to one of the fundraising people. I would mostly be compiling reports on station activities for big donors. They said they wanted someone with 2-3 years of full time fundraising experience. I applied and never heard back. The application said not to attempt to contact them other than through the online form. One of the questions on the stupid University of Missouri-STL app I had to go through was "How many years of fundraising experience do you have (full time only.)" I put one year, which is a lie, and I'm sure the computer filtered my application out. In my cover letter I explained that I have several years of part-time radio experience, as well as my internship that involved a lot of calling people and filing reports. This has been my experience with every job I have applied for over the past two years. When I do manage to contact them and ask about my application, they say that there were a lot of applications and they chose someone else. It doesn't seem like my current strategy (keep slinging coffee and applying to jobs) is working, so it is tempting to make a big change.

[AugustWest]

I'm sorry, but we're on "Figuring out what job it is you want." 

"Actually finding and getting the job you want." is another thread.

[wombat]

Yeah, I can't help with that one. I've been applying for things I seem perfectly suited for and not hearing back since before you were born. And they are usually not things where they want 2-3 years of experience doing something I haven't done.

[wombat]

Actually I can offer one generalization but it's the kind of thing that I hate to hear so don't say I didn't warn you: Most of the jobs I have gotten, I have gotten because I knew someone, and/or worked for the place for free first.

[littlefallsmets]

Today I'm gonna realize, eight days into being dumped and left, that... like... some day at some point, I'm going to have to go on dates again and stuff. Which is fuck*ng awful.

I mean, I'm way too fucked up to do it any time soon, of course, it would only turn into a fuck*ng weird rebound thing good for no one. But.

Can't I just point at an attractive woman who is single and in one of my circle of friends and then we're living together?

This should be how it works.

For fuck's sake.

[jay-ell]

Actually I can offer one generalization but it's the kind of thing that I hate to hear so don't say I didn't warn you: Most of the jobs I have gotten, I have gotten because I knew someone, and/or worked for the place for free first.

That's pretty much what I was going to say. A lot of the strangest/most fun jobs I've had have sort of fallen in my lap because I knew somebody who was hiring. But I don't know if that's a good model for a guy your age to try to follow in this market. Do you look at the classifieds/Craigslist postings? I used to trawl the job listings and just apply for everything that sounded interesting, regardless of pay, benefits, etc. Most of the really cool & strange jobs are part-time (usually moonlighting) anyway -- you don't have to quit your current job to try new things. Like wombles said, you could always volunteer.

Especially if you're wanting to work for a nonprofit -- volunteering for an organization you'd like to ultimately work for gets you in contact with the people who make hiring decisions, and when something opens up, they'll think of you first.