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[greenkoolayd]

when can we expect this li'l lady's first post?

[Turbo Ninja]

when can we expect this li'l lady's first post?

ELIZA CAN'T HANDLE ALL THE EXPECTATIONS TO POST ON A REGULAR SCHEDULE.  She's taking an indefinite hiatus to get away from all the scrutiny, except for a steady stream of interviews in which she will complain about not being left alone.

Poop story the first: You know how in The Princess Bride, Wesley and Buttercup learned how to avoid the flame spurts in the Fire Swamp by listening for the popping sound?  We learned that diaper removal seems to be Eliza's cue to poop one more time.  She managed to soil her changing-table cover a few times until we learned to listen for the proverbial popping sound before the spurt, if you know what I mean.  Now the old diaper stays on until the very last split second before the new one is ready to go.

Also, the only thing magical about a Diaper Genie is how fast it fills up.

[jay-ell]

We used open the diaper, then close it immediately, wait for the poop/sprinkle, and then change it. Especially with boys, there seems to be something about the rush of cool air to the nether regions that triggers the "last blast" phenomenon.

[greenkoolayd]

File this under "things you might say you miss but really don't" for me.

Now all I got to do is say "go back and wash your hands."

the child-wipes-own-behind-stage is pretty long, thankfully.

[jay-ell]

File this under "things you might say you miss but really don't" for me.

Now all I got to do is say "go back and wash your hands."

I wouldn't even say I miss it. I didn't mind changing diapers at the time, but holy hell am I glad I don't have to do it any more. I got crapped on every single time I changed my son for the first six weeks of his life.

We are donating Chaos Girl's birth-to-booster carseat to a family in need, and I was talking to her about how she's going to get a big-girl seat and her old seat is going to a new baby. (Her response: "A little baby? That's so cute!") I put one of her dolls in it to make sure the five-point harness was threaded correctly, and looked at it and realized that babies are really small. Really, really small.

Then I looked at Chaos and said, "What happened to my little baby girl?" She climbed into my lap and said, "Goo goo." And I said, "Oh, sweetie. I love you. I'm glad you're growing up. Because babies are stinky." She thought that was pretty hilarious. "Stinky babies! You silly, mama." Yeah. I'm the silly one.

What I'm saying here is, babies are awesome when they're babies, and it just gets better when they become kids. Congrats again, Turbo Ninja, and may your child be one of those wunderkinds who toilet trains herself by the age of two.

[Nabubrush]

I will, as always, enjoy each stage as it does not come.

[jaydub]

It occurred to me, on Monday, that I have been changing diapers - several times a day - for 10 years.  There was about a 3 month break between my daughter's last and my son's first - but 10 solid years.

This is not something one thinks about when they're a teenager.

[side_show]

I am definitely not pregnant right now, however to our total terror hubby and I picked up a four pack of pregnancy tests at Costco today because we're about to start the unprotected sex.  There was an interesting moment when both of us clearly did not want to turn and look at the immediate other side of the isle where the diapers are.  Oh Costco, why you gotta put the condoms, pregnancy tests and diapers in the same isle, all within immediate periphery vision of each other?  The tampons and adult diapers are also in the same isle, so I guess it's sort of the "significant life stages" isle.

Confession time:  I have never changed a poopy diaper in my life.  I easily puke and poop is one my triggers.  I know the gross factor will hopefully wear off.  What with having a sibling 16 yrs younger than him, hubby has lots of practice, but I know this will help nothing when I'm alone with the baby.  I have far more "changing boy babies" experience than me though, so our godson has peed on my hubby's ear, where as having babysat about 8 boys and changed many a pee diaper, I have always been aware of the need to quickly cover a baby boy's junk to avoid such a fate (so far) and warned him of such (which he ignored).  At least he turned his head in time to get hit in the ear rather than the mouth.

[AugustWest]

It occurred to me, on Monday, that I have been changing diapers - several times a day - for 10 years.  There was about a 3 month break between my daughter's last and my son's first - but 10 solid years.

This is not something one thinks about when they're a teenager.

I did it for a good five, so I bow in respect before your craptacular abilities.

[jay-ell]

It occurred to me, on Monday, that I have been changing diapers - several times a day - for 10 years.  There was about a 3 month break between my daughter's last and my son's first - but 10 solid years.

This is not something one thinks about when they're a teenager.

*props*

I had a brief window of about six months where I was changing two butts' worth of diapers, but the older kid was in pull-ups and it was mostly pee by that point. And my daughter trained easily and early, so the period from Danger Boy's first poo to her last wet diaper only spanned about five and a half years.

Confession time:  I have never changed a poopy diaper in my life.  I easily puke and poop is one my triggers.  I know the gross factor will hopefully wear off.

The nice thing about babies is that everything about them levels up as you gain experience. The first few poops are basically what they have sitting around their guts from being in the womb for nine months; it doesn't stink at all, though you might have trouble looking at chocolate pudding for a while. The next six months of poops are only slightly worse; when all you eat is breast milk and/or infant formula, there's not much to make your butt deposits exciting or gross. By the time they start eating solids -- and that's when it can get really colorful and aromatic in there -- you're a seasoned Mom and you've pretty much dealt with it.

Besides which, parenthood has a way of warping one's brain so that at some point you even think the way your kid poops is cute. Which is why parents talk about poop all the time -- it becomes such a normal part of life that it loses its taboo/ick factor. To the point where you don't even think twice before sticking your hand in the toilet of a public restroom to retrieve your toddler's pacifier. (Though you'd have to be pretty addled to give it back to your kid without a thorough sanitation first, of course.)

[jaydub]

My wife's gag button is hit hard by poop (and garbage) so I have borne the majority of the load (so to speak).  Her pregnancies were both pretty miserable, and ended in C-sections which take much longer to recover from than the traditional way - so I'm happy to do my part in kid raising.

My daughter was continent from about 24 months - she just wouldn't use the toilet to poop. She'd hold it all day until she got her night time diaper on, then she'd disappear into her room for some quiet time.  Once I figured out what she was doing (at about 2 1/2) I decided just to roll with it.  I figured she'd get with the program when she was ready, and ultimately she did.  One thing that is great about being an older parent is that you tend to be a lot more relaxed about stuff like that (or so our pediatrician observes - she sees us about 90% less often than her younger parents who lose their shit over every fever, loose stool, and runny nose their kids get).

[wombat]

Oh Costco, why you gotta put the condoms, pregnancy tests and diapers in the same isle, all within immediate periphery vision of each other?  The tampons and adult diapers are also in the same isle, so I guess it's sort of the "significant life stages" isle.

Sounds like the "bodily fluids" department to me. Much like this thread.

[pmcd9]

Man, this thread really went to shit, literally.

[side_show]

Heh, yup, hope your TCODP doesn't have too much fecal matter on it.

Also, I love the idea of it being the bodily fluid isle.  I'm gonna call it that from now on.

[greenkoolayd]

ok, now that everyone is posted in here, wash your hands before you touch your face.  we dont need pink eye going around.