The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Sports & Leisure => Topic started by: Asherdan on March 09, 2011, 09:28:00 pm
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(http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--k5m636Zb--/m5dvkzj95cd6xl0k4nnx.gif)
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i don't mind being a rookie two seasons in a row. if the roster is full without me, i'm sure i don't need the distraction, so put me on the reserve list
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Indeed.
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Huh. I always thought it was hosshide.
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I gesso.
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I gotta bail on this one. As last year's number of transactions indicated, I am far too neurotic with this stuff.
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I'm willing to stumble my way through.
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I thought it was pork. I guess that's just footballs.
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I can almost guarantee our baseballs all come from the Dominican Republic. Not that they have a hoss population problem in need of control either.
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I'm in.
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I will take a spot again this year. Expect roster updates with every new Achewood strip over the course of the season.
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When's opening day anyhow?
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ok
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I'm in and I think I can follow through this time.
Can't commish, tho.
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I did it last year, didn't I?
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When's opening day anyhow?
Thursday, March 31. Six games that day, instead of the recent trend of having Yankees-Red Sox or some other big-market matchup as the only game on a Sunday night.
Braves-Nats is truly the first game (along with Tigers-Yankees) at 1:05 in the afternoon. If work isn't too horrible, I'll be there.
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Braves-Nats is truly the first game (along with Tigers-Yankees) at 1:05 in the afternoon. If work isn't too horrible, I'll be there.
I thought the Reds always played the first game.
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I thought the Reds always played the first game.
That tradition died a while ago. Blame ESPN.
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I'd be willing to commish if it isn't too arduous, but I'm much more comfortable doing it for football, as I don't know anything about baseball other than the fact that Sandy Koufax wasn't a Cub.
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I'd be willing to commish if it isn't too arduous, but I'm much more comfortable doing it for football, as I don't know anything about baseball other than the fact that Sandy Koufax wasn't a Cub.
After the initial set up there's literally nothing to it.
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After the initial set up there's literally nothing to it.
Well, I guess I'm up for it, then. I head back to work today/tomorrow, so if this weekend isn't too late for everybody, I will set it up.
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http://baseball.fantasysports.yahoo.com/b1/register/tos?league_id=177702&password=nicepete
League name: Achewood Memorial Baseball
League number: 177702
Password: nicepete
Holy crap are there a lot of scoring categories. I entertained the idea of adding/changing some, but I don't know enough and don't want to screw up the balance. If anyone is interested in having any changes made, post 'em here and we'll talk about them.
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I'm the Debauched Sloths.
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Thanks Nabu.
You got the Oakey Blues playing as well. The only immediate change I'd make is to go to one instead of two divisions.
There's something I like about having divisions, but if we don't get like 16 teams then it's not as cool. However, I don't know shit from shinola, so I am cool with not having divisions.
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Let me help you with one problem (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VsyS0oHLNFA) and also suggest that we can change the division things later depending on the number of teams.
Well, I found my special purpose, so I'm good with that, anyway.
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I have decided my name is Mr. Mixed Pickles this year.
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(The name is based on my inability to pronounce the name of the 5-dimension imp Superman occasionally battles.)
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Mixtle - plix or whatever?
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Yessir.
Mister Mixedpickles.
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DERP
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Yessir.
Mister Mixedpickles.
Don't you mean Mister Selkcipdexim?
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I should probably de-lurk before this thing takes off without me. I'm kind of tired of the old Phlogistons moniker, though. This year my team will be Fun on Mars.
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So, as of this minute we are one day and twenty-three hours from the first pitch, as far as I can tell. We have eight teams (in one division). I think I will give it until the end of business today (approximately ten more hours) and I will finalize the league and turn on draft-ready status. I'll be keeping an eye on this thread over the course of the next day, but I have to go wireless to turn on the draft as the site is blocked here at work. Hopefully the wireless won't go down.
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Are we having a live draft?
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Are we having a live draft?
I like live drafts, but I haven't really seen where other people are that into it. I don't mind doing it, I just won't be able to take part unless it's like 1 am eastern.
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I'd just as soon auto-draft. I just didn't want to miss it if there was a live one.
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What AW said. I have no time to sweat a live draft right now.
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It is done, and let Cthulu have mercy on our souls. Sometime between now and Sunday we should have our draft.
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Auto draft also lets me blame the computer for my lousy team instead of my crappy baseball knowledge!
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I went to register and it said the commish had already finalized the teams. Bummer.
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I apologize for that - I thought a week was long enough, and we had an even number of teams so I thought it was a good time to pull the trigger as the season starts tomorrow or some such. If someone else wants to join and everybody is up for it, I think I can reopen the registration.
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Yeah no, your thinking is fair. Its my fault.
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So I had this whole great plan for opening day at Nats Park. Take the day off work, go to Ted's Bulletin for breakfast, then go to the Ugly Mug and drink mid-day beers before heading to the ballpark.
But now it's fuck*ng raining and the fuck*ng thing may be rained out. They have an off-day built in to the schedule for just these kind of circumstances, so I can take off Friday and do it then instead. But right now the plan is to go to the downtown office instead of Ted's Bulletin, and either wait for them to say it's rained out, in which case I work tomorrow, or go hang around the ballpark on a shitty rainy day if they decide to try to play it.
Really, the idea of taking a full day off work and not giving a shit was just as important, if not more so, than the baseball.
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Is there a way where you can go in to work and still not give a shit? Because that's what I do and, although it isn't optimal, it gets me through the day.
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Arent you involved with making sure wells dont 'splode? Would you please give a shit?
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Is there a way where you can go in to work and still not give a shit? Because that's what I do
You'll love it, It's a way of life!
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Arent you involved with making sure wells dont 'splode? Would you please give a shit?
Shit. I knew there was something going on up here that I was supposed to pay attention to.
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If you aren't aware, the auto-draft has occurred.
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Yeah, I got a little email this morning about that. I guess I ought to go set the lineup and see who I got.
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I got Granderson again! He killed it for me the first year I played.
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im sure is for fun, but how accurate would you baseball enjoyers say this is?
(http://slyoyster.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/baseballcounties.jpg)
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I'd say the Cardinal/Reds border is a little farther east into Ky.
The Braves are misleading too. I think they have a fairly strong national fanbase thanks to TBS. It would interesting to compare how the Cowboys' fandom matches up with the Braves' to see if the same sort of "America's Team" loving douche likes both.
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Phillies territory comes way lower into DC. As do the Yankees. Those are the only two teams I really hear about here. Maybe this will change if the Nationals ever get good.
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I can't tell if I'm supposed to root for the Ms or the Giants. I had thought that I was supposed to be a Senators fan (that is the DC team, right?) since we were fighting to get the team.
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Phillies territory comes way lower into DC. As do the Yankees. Those are the only two teams I really hear about here. Maybe this will change if the Nationals ever get good.
I beg to differ. Nats Park has become Philadelphia South because the Phils sell out all their home games, so people come down here where they can actually buy tickets. And you have that "hometown loyalty/nobody is actually from here" thing, which leads people to come cheer for Philly teams, New York teams, Boston, Detroit, etc. But I don't think any of those are prevalent enough that I would call DC, Virginia or most of Maryland "Phillies territory," not by a long shot.
Opening Day at Nats Park today was fuck*ng cold, and the Nats went down meekly 2-0. But at least they got the game is. And yes, I worked about three hours on a day when I was supposed to be off all day.
Fantasy team: I got Joey Votto! And Ryan Zimmerman! Whoo! Not sure about the pitching, though. One of my starters is on the DL. Love it when I draft the injured guys.
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I think the Devil Rays' territory is optimistic. And does that much of Wisconsin actually care about baseball? I thought they punched cows and fly-giraffeed between football seasons up there.
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A-Rod. I'd feel less conflicted about it if it were a few years ago when he was really, really good, but I hate him more than any other athlete ever, aside from John Elway and maybe Max Hall. Also Jeter. I like him well enough even though he plays for Satan, but same thing, too bad these guys are way past their prime.
I was reading up on some stats this morning before I realized I was too late. Oh well.
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My bats were kind of fire today.
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I'm going to have to remember how to play this game, huh?
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I'm going to have to remember how to play this game, huh?
Don't do it on my account - I can use any advantage I can get.
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more random BS from me:
baseball no-stars (http://www.bigfatwhale.com/archives/bfw_506.htm)
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I don't think the Rangers are a popular team. Fill up that non DFW area of Texas with Cubs fans instead. They seem to be very popular down here.
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This game is... starting to come back to me.
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I remember this now. This is when my pitching sucks.
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If I could find a deal fair to both of us, I could do to trade some of my outfield depth for a mediocre closer, to bump me up in the saves category.
Just throwing that out there.
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I have entirely too many third basemen. I am keeping Zimmerman, but Beltre or McGehee could be had in a deal.
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Hmmmmm. Yeah, actually when Youklis positionally qualifies for it, I'm gonna be flush at the hot corner too.
My big concerns right now are mainly relief pitching and the fact that my best hitter who qualifies at catcher is a part-time player so I'm gonna have to either get another dude down the road or do a lot of fuck*ng juggling.
Starting pitching, I'm okay but you could always have more, you know?
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Hmmmmm. Yeah, actually when Youklis positionally qualifies for it, I'm gonna be flush at the hot corner too.
My big concerns right now are mainly relief pitching and the fact that my best hitter who qualifies at catcher is a part-time player so I'm gonna have to either get another dude down the road or do a lot of fuck*ng juggling.
Starting pitching, I'm okay but you could always have more, you know?
No, I don't know. Now is when I remember that baseball is pretty much incomprehensible to me, and dealing with a fantasy baseball team involves entirely too much work for me.
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In the first two games, the Chicago White Sox got thirty hits.
Their only starter without a hit is Alex Rios.
In the first two games, Mister Mixedpickles has started Alex Rios.
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He blistered two balls today. One was to the warning track and the other was a line-out stopped by a diving Jack Hannahan.
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Taking a road series against a bad team isn't such a huge thing but for the Mets, I will celebrate this notion way too much.
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I'm not saying I don't understand this, but I apparently picked up the worst pitcher in baseball just before he had the worst performance of his life?
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I think it'll be OK, Nabu. You people are hitting the piss out of the ball. I'm lucky it's even close at this point.
Well, see, that's the thing - for some reason the hitting makes sense to me, so I can do pretty well on that, but the pitching doesn't. So I'll get killed in the pitching, and then actually have to compete in the hitting, which means I'll sit at about 30% success.
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how's come benched players register points? what's the ding dang point of the bench? my bench hasn't registered any points, but the mayor is kicking me up and down the base line because of his benched players' points.
looks like i need new players at C and 3B, that's for sure.
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how's come benched players register points?
Those are points they scored while in the line-up. You can move your players from the active lineup to the bench on a daily basis. So if it's a day when some teams have off-days, you shift the guys on the bench who are active to the line-up for guys who are off. When there's a full slate of 15 games, that's when you have to decide who plays and who sits.
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Those are points they scored while in the line-up. You can move your players from the active lineup to the bench on a daily basis. So if it's a day when some teams have off-days, you shift the guys on the bench who are active to the line-up for guys who are off. When there's a full slate of 15 games, that's when you have to decide who plays and who sits.
And there goes another of my only advantages.
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oh snap this i did not know
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oh snap this i did not know
Dammit.
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And there goes another of my only advantages.
I thought twice about posting this, but I didn't think it fair to keep it under wraps. And I am not the least bit worried about finishing ahead of Choop, anyway.
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I thought twice about posting this, but I didn't think it fair to keep it under wraps. And I am not the least bit worried about finishing ahead of Choop, anyway.
I'm not the least bit worried about finishing ahead of anyone. Much in the same way that I am not the least bit worried about dying in an unfortunate train derailment on the Kashmir Railway.
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I thought twice about posting this, but I didn't think it fair to keep it under wraps. And I am not the least bit worried about finishing ahead of Choop, anyway.
damn dude, insult to injury
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Christ, you guys are monitoring this daily? I'm boned.
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okay can anybody explain the system designating who's on the can't cut list. i fucked myself over on the gridiron with a guy on that list, and it looks like the autodraft might have fucked me on a slot here too.
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Don't worry.
If I've learned anything about fantasy sports, it is that sometimes overthinking is more deadly than diligent guessing.
That's me. I'm the guy that overthinks.
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okay can anybody explain the system designating who's on the can't cut list. i fucked myself over on the gridiron with a guy on that list, and it looks like the autodraft might have fucked me on a slot here too.
I can't, but I ran into a problem with it a couple years ago. Normally the can't cut list is guys you wouldn't want to cut anyway, but I had one get injured. Once it became clear he was going to be on the DL most or all of the rest of the season, they took him off the can't cut list.
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I was wondering why it was so hard to find a good backup shortstop and then I realized:
The Modern Dance alone has the starting shortstops for the Mets, the Yankees, the Cubs and the Marlins. All on one team.
Interesting.
Anyway. I am starting to feel a little better about my team. I have no chance of winning the stolen base category basically ever and I am mediocre at getting saves...
However I got a decent chance in most of the other categories.
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3B Evan Longoria shaved off his bushy mullet after a rough spring that saw him placed on the DL with an oblique strain, one of his cars stolen, his spring home burglarized and his team start 0-3.
And that's just one of my guys. This is going to be a long season.
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I was wondering why it was so hard to find a good backup shortstop and then I realized:
The Modern Dance alone has the starting shortstops for the Mets, the Yankees, the Cubs and the Marlins. All on one team.
Interesting.
Anyway. I am starting to feel a little better about my team. I have no chance of winning the stolen base category basically ever and I am mediocre at getting saves...
However I got a decent chance in most of the other categories.
Saves and stolen bases can almost always be had on the waiver wire. Because players accumulating saves or steals are often otherwise crappy.
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It looks like it's gonna be a hell of a long season for the Astros, but on the next to last play of today's game the announcer caught a foul ball with his bare hands.
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The Modern Dance snuck in and tied me for "saves" at the last minute and it... really kinda messed with me.
Well-played.
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Maybe the league should contract. At least I'm not dead last.
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So, "Area man" plays fantasy baseball. Who knew? (http://www.onionsportsnetwork.com/articles/area-man-already-tired-of-adjusting-his-fantasy-ba,19960/)
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Well played, DERP, the only reason I beatcha was I lucked out with a monster Sunday despite myself.
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Well played, DERP, the only reason I beatcha was I lucked out with a monster Sunday despite myself.
well, as they say on my team, HNGGGGGGGGH. though to be honest i worked something like 75 hours this week and kind of forgot baseball was being played. i just switched a shit ton of my roster around (3 on DL? awesome. what's that? 2 of them on can't cut? awesomer.) so that maybe next week i won't lose 7 to 2
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McCourts lose control of Dodgers because they are so fuck*ng mad at each other (http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news?slug=ap-mlb-dodgers).
A) Don't work for kinfolk.
B) If you are going to fuck people other than your spouse, make sure they are ok with it.
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Well, I think it also has to do with them hell of mortgaging the team so that they can buy homes and such.
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christ a'mitey themoderndance. i knew my sticks weren't great but i thought my arms might save me. how are you doing what you are doing.
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Oh yeah, I am getting fuck*ng murdered this week too.
I'm writing this week off on my fuck*ng taxes next year.
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Fun on Mars had fun on kicking my goddamned ass.
Well done, sir.
Gotta figure out my starting pitching a bit more, you know.
Figure out who is actually going to turn it around and who is just terrible, sample size be damned.
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Yeah, seriously, all the other games had the decency to end in a tie. What's your problem?
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I feel like I really can't cut these two DL guys I have - but the pitcher, it says a rehab assignment is upcoming? I guess that's in the minors. Is he not going to pitch at all this year? It says that he's still owned in like 85% of leagues. There can't be that many people as clueless as I am, can there?
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Who you talkin bout Willis?
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I was talking about Phil Hughes, about whom Yahoo! says:
RHP Phil Hughes will throw another bullpen session Monday. Hughes will test his fatigued right arm that one more time before heading for a minor-league rehab assignment on Thursday or Friday.
but I decided to dump him because he seems like a stiff. The other two guys are Evan Longoria, who even I know is supposed to be good, and Andrew Bailey, who is the guy who is still owned in all the leagues. I had conflated facts about my two gimpy pitchers.
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I guess the assumption about Bailey is that when he comes back he will be THE closer for the A's. "Bullpen by committee" is maddening for fantasy owners, so when you have a guy who gets EVERY save situation for his team, that's valuable. Even if it's a shitty team that doesn't get that many save opportunities.
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People love to go to Nationals games with me in theory. "Oh, yeah, let me know when you have an extra ticket, I'd love to go."
In practice: "Tomorrow night? Nah, no can do."
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People love to go to Nationals games with me in theory. "Oh, yeah, let me know when you have an extra ticket, I'd love to go."
In practice: "Tomorrow night? Nah, no can do."
I think I remember this happening last year as well. Hm.
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I would definitely be down for going to a baseball game at almost any time. I don't go very often because I can't afford it.
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The Rockies have $4 tickets, is this not a thing?
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The Nats have $5 tickets. But it's not just the tickets, it's the $8 beers and $7 hot dogs. Theoretically one can go to the game and avoid those things, but that's just not as much fund.
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the braves used to have what we called nickel nosebleeds - $5 for the upper deck. they've hiked the rate up to $8 now, though.
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The Nats have $5 tickets. But it's not just the tickets, it's the $8 beers and $7 hot dogs. Theoretically one can go to the game and avoid those things, but that's just not as much fund.
Don't forget the $20 parking!
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The Nats have $5 tickets. But it's not just the tickets, it's the $8 beers and $7 hot dogs. Theoretically one can go to the game and avoid those things, but that's just not as much fund.
Clearly they need a Screaming-Eagles-style tailgate. I did the math and realized if I go to just one SE tailgate all season I've already broken even on my membership fee.
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We would bring in hidden liquor, we never ate and we lived close enough to walk. Now I don't, but I would just drive somewhere close enough, park and walk.
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And well-played, Monkeys.
Despite hard-luck on the WHIP and the ERA early, you roared back to salvage a near-tie.
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And well-played, Monkeys.
Despite hard-luck on the WHIP and the ERA early, you roared back to salvage a near-tie.
Mainly because I've been very busy at work and I can't figure out wireless on my new computer, so I couldn't futz around with my lineup hardly at all.
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Francisco Liriano threw a no-hitter tonight!
Guess who I dumped from my team last week because his ERA was over 9!
Fuck this game!
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Yeah, the horrifying state of the White Sox bats will do that.
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Oakey Blues, I tip my hat to you and a well-fought week.
I got lucky in a coupla close categories.
And the pitchers Wins category continues to be bafflingly random to a dude.
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ALSO: the Debauched Sloths are insane. They are destroying my ass.
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ALSO: the Debauched Sloths are insane. They are destroying my ass.
It ain't nothing but dumb luck, dude.
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One of my pitchers threw a no-hitter last week, and I STILL lost to the Debauched Sloths, big-time. Somehow that doesn't seem fair.
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Holy crap!
Jose Bautista decided to go nuts and get me a win by the barest minimum!
Holy wow, that was a good week of fake baseball. Good game, Sloths.
I have not given Bautista steroids, I swear.
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It ain't nothing but dumb luck, dude.
See? SEE?!
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A 9-1 whoopin' puts me back on the good side of .500 and back in playoff position. (Not that the latter means much this early in the season, but still.)
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great, i get my first win and DROP a spot in the rankings. good thing i just got the android app, i won't be able to check my computer for a few days coming up
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41-year-old Mariano Rivera became the first player in major league history to make 1,000 appearances with the same team on Wednesday.
I could give a shit about the Yanks, but that's pretty cool. That line should probably say first pitcher, though - but maybe the "make appearances" thing implies it? I'm not good with baseball.
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I find it pretty hard to hate Mo, even though he was a crucial part of the team that beat the Mariners in the 2000 and 2001 ALCS. 2001 still hurts, but that was a great World Series. Probably my favorite still, or maybe tied with '86.
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Out of a combined 15 at bats, my two guys in the 19 inning game in Philadelphia tonight got two hits. No runs, no RBIs and one stolen base. And these are two of my best players. Man.
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I failed to update my line-up in time to get Max Scherzer in. On the other hand, he is having his ass handed to him by the Red Sox. So, s'ok.
Wilson Valdez, Chase Utley's backup at 2B, pitched the 19th inning of that game last night and ended up with the win. First position player to start a game in the field and end up the winning pitcher since Babe freakin' Ruth in 1920-something. Probably the first time Wilson Valdez and Babe Ruth have ever been mentioned in the same sentence.
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I could give a shit about the Yanks, but that's pretty cool. That line should probably say first pitcher, though - but maybe the "make appearances" thing implies it? I'm not good with baseball.
Appearances is a specific term in baseball that refers to pitching appearances. For position players, it'd be games played or plate appearances. If someone "leads the league in appearances", then they're a pitcher.
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DERP, I have no idea how you managed to make this week a nailbiter with half your positional players injured but, like, you did it.
Well done.
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i haven't even logged in to yahoo in a couple weeks, dude. sorry bout that.
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i haven't even logged in to yahoo in a couple weeks, dude. sorry bout that.
Nothing, NOTHING, makes a guy feel better than doing worse than a zombie owner.
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Nothing, NOTHING, makes a guy feel better than doing worse than a zombie owner.
If it makes you feel any better, Nabu, I sweated over each and every move I made last week.
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As always, Fun on Mars, your judicious use of cycling your pitchers made this whole week exciting.
Kudos.
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You know that The Madness is setting in when you start reflecting upon how your fantasy team lacks the killer instinct to step on the throat and really close out a week strong.
Because...
You know...
It is an imaginary team made up of people who do not actually play together and do not know me at all.
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I saw the Astros play this week. Man, did they stink up the joint.
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Good game, Monkeys...
You sniped some points last moment and made it interesting!
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We might as well be playing fantasy pelota at this point. I have no idea what is going on.
Thanks to Josh Johnson, though, for hanging out on the DL for the duration. Fuck you, Josh!
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DAMMIT!!! (http://www.courier-journal.com/article/20110620/SPORTS07/306200061/1002/St-Louis-slugger-Albert-Pujols-out-4-6-weeks-broken-arm?odyssey=mod|newswell|text|Home|p)
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Yeah, that sucks pretty hard. They were talking about it on Baseball Tonight last night, how injuries to the hand/wrist that's on the bottom when you swing can deprive hitters of power. They gave Derek Lee as an example, someone else, I forget who, but they said it's bad news. AND, if he can't make it back before the season's out, and prove he's still The Machine, it freaks the hell out of his contract negotiations. If you're not sure he's going to come back the same guy, who's going to want to pay the 47 bazillion dollars he's going to demand?
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Crazy times here in Nats Town. They win 11 out of 12 to get a game over .500 and have people seriously talking about the wild card (which is kind of ridiculous, IMO, but fun anyway). Then, immediately after beating the M's 1-0 in the bottom of the 9th for the sweep, the manager resigns because he's pissed that the front office hasn't picked up his option for next season yet. Who does that?!
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If you can make a winning team out of Ryan Zimmerman and 24 pieces of shit, the league itself should mandate your contract getting picked up.
Absolutely.
If nothing else, he's earned a bench coach position on another team that will most likely pay better than being the manager in Washington.
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"24 pieces of shit" is a little strong, there. The team has definitely improved, but there's still a ways to go. They are ahead of the New York Mets at this moment, so there's that.
Yeah, I'm not happy with either party in this situation. If you're going to send Riggs away at the end of the year and bring in Davey Johnson, then you should at least tell him that. Have a conversation about it instead of stonewalling him. Even so, I think walking out at this point is shitty. Anxious to see how the team responds this weekend.
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So, in short...sometimes the front office is the problem, not the field personnel.
That whole being competitive for about one month (well two if you count this month) of the teams existence backs that up.
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Much truth to that, Ash. But at the same time, if you don't like working under a one-year contract... don't sign a one-year contract.
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Johnny Paycheck FTW.
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The sports pundits are leaning mostly against Riggs, but not entirely. Tim Kurkjian is sympathetic.
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/columns/story?columnist=kurkjian_tim&id=6699591
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One of the local writers made a good point: team president Stan Kasten resigned at the end of last year, and his position wasn't filled. If he had been still around (or presumably if someone equally competent had been appointed), this wouldn't have gone down like this. Kasten was an excellent communicator who knew what was going on with pretty much everyone in the organization, so he would have made Rizzo and Riggs get together and work out their issues.
I think they should appoint ME as team president, personally.
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Hey Ash! The racing presidents will be out your way next week! Be sure to tackle Teddy so he can't win.
http://blog.letteddywin.com/2011/06/24/nationals-presidents-race-in-anaheim/
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The Rally Monkey is basically the mascot, eh?
The other three would be the Yankees, Dodgers, and the Cubs, he says from memory.
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I didn't even think of the rally monkey, but the thunderstick is a bigger plague on baseball than steroids. Now that I am thinking of the rally monkey, I don't know if it or the thundersticks are worse. So yeah, keep your Los Angeles of Anaheim pride down, I would say.
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Between thundersticks and the vuvuzula . . . fuck*ng just shout and clap, assholes.
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Beat me into a draw, well done, Oakey Blues.
I need to figure out a new direction in this... it LOOKS like I should be dominating and I'm not at all...
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That's because you're a bad person and I'm a genius.
Thanks, Wile E.
Don't worry LFM. I'm sure you'll make a strong comeback this week.
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Ugh. Don't worry, y'all, it looks like the Sloths are gonna blast me back down the ladder this week...
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I'm sorry I've been such a shitty owner; it's kind of a pain in the ass to manage this with the new job, due to firewalls and shit.
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Well, not so much firewalls as a large corporation wanting its employees and contractors to do a little work once in a while.
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See? The Sloths crushed my nuts on Day One AND my best closer went on the DL, just to rub it in.
The come-uppance is kicking in.
DEEP. HURTING.
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Christ.
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See? The Sloths crushed my nuts on Day One AND my best closer went on the DL, just to rub it in.
The come-uppance is kicking in.
DEEP. HURTING.
For a guy who's hurting so bad you sure are leading in a bunch of categories.
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They're basically ties, though, slim leads mean nothing mid-week.
It's all just more set-up for the heartbreak.
I'm a Mets fan.
I know such things.
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Holy crap, Sloths, that was a fuck*ng rollercoaster of a week.
I was lucky to eke out a thin victory. Well done.
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Holy crap, Sloths, that was a fuck*ng rollercoaster of a week.
Yeah. All downhill.
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With Reyes injured, any victory for me is phyrric.
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I looked through the thread: who is "The Modern Dance"?
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I looked through the thread: who is "The Modern Dance"?
Me. (I am)
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I listened to that album today, it is awesome.
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Me. (I am)
I thought so, but you know . . . Miles.
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A third of my hitters are injured!
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(...without Jose Reyes, the Mets are basically terrible and so are the Mixed Pickles...)
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Oh, hell and damnation. I left a kick-ass Whole Camels start on the bench today. Would have totally flipped this game the other way.
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Whole Camels
Is this a filter I am unaware of?
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They give these ball players nowadays funny names.
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I don't give a damn.
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Is this a filter I am unaware of?
No, it's this guy (http://phillies.mlb.com/team/player.jsp?player_id=430935).
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Goddamn all-star break. I have a really good feeling about my line-up early this week. And according to my calculations, on Thursday it all goes to shit. fuck*ng all-star break.
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OK kids. It's not so much the second half as it is the final third. Eight weeks to go in the regular season. The Pickles and Sloths are well out in front, while DERP, the Monkeys and the Dance bring up the rear (though there is ample time to stage a comeback). Looks like Oakey Blues, Banana Town and Fun on Mars will fight it out for the other two playoff spots, with one team left sitting outside all sad and lonely. Good luck, everyone.
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DERP, your pitching ninja is strong. Very strong.
I lucked out a bit offensively and I salute you.
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I had a pretty dang good batting rally today. It didn't help much though. The worst part is that my best performer on my imaginary team, Carl Crawford, hit .750, had two runs and drove in two more against my real life team and helped seal their 15th straight loss, a team record. Christ. What's worse than that, the Mariners are actually finally getting something done on offense. Where the fuck did the pitching go? When I went up to Seattle last and saw them beat the Yankees we were in contention to lead the division. Now, a winning record will be a fuck*ng miracle.
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Fun on Mars, you stepped on the jugular and took this one from me and I salute you for it.
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Once again I leave a quality start on the bench. That was worth at least one point. I really have to get in the habit of checking my team on the weekends.
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I am... so fucked and melting away from the injuries to my bats up the middle that I don't even WANNA check my roster sometimes.
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Three weeks to go in the regular season. The Pickles and the Sloths have clinched playoff spots. The Monkeys and the Dance aren't mathematically eliminated yet, but it's close.
Blues, Quitters, Mars and DERP fighting for two playoff spots. I pretty well wrote off DERP in my all-star break summary, but they've come back and are currently 3.5 points out of the last playoff spot. They get a shot at Oakey Blues this week, and Banana Town in the final week.
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This week shall be the last stand, I think, for the Mixed Pickles being in first place.
The Pickles are injury-ravaged and it's time for a head-to-head with the second place Sloths.
This has certainly been a fun season of fake baseball but it is fascinating how fast my team's wheels are coming off due to injury at the end of the fake regular season.
It's almost like they mirror my Mets. Good bats and meh pitching and then... the injuries hit the good bats.
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You are obviously the class of fake baseball and maybe the only one who understands it. You are being disingenuous. Congratulations, though.
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Uh, did something happen to yesterday's stats?
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Yeah, shit is fucked up there right now.
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OK, did someone change the playoff structure when I wasn't looking? It says the top 6 teams make the playoffs (with the top two getting a first-round bye). I could have sworn only the top 4 made it. This makes my previous posts on the playoff race pretty much null and void, and the rest of the regular season rather anti-climactic.
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OK, did someone change the playoff structure when I wasn't looking? It says the top 6 teams make the playoffs (with the top two getting a first-round bye). I could have sworn only the top 4 made it. This makes my previous posts on the playoff race pretty much null and void, and the rest of the regular season rather anti-climactic.
Wait. Did I win?
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It is... difficult to be happy with the fact that I regained a little breathing room this week because so many integral parts of my roster are injured to shit.
To shit and a half, I say.
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Well played, Bananas... a hard fought tie.
One more week before the playoffs!
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I was leading like 9-1 mid-week, but then your hitters decided to hit, apparently.
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And somehow I end the week 9-1. Not my first victory this season, but my first by a margin greater than 1. Weird.
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Yeah, my... strength is not in my pitching. At all.
When everyone's healthy, I got some good hitters for sure but pitching is... different.
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Well this sucks. Nelson Cruz is going to be on the DL for the rest of our season. But can I drop him and add a productive player? Nooooooooo. Cruz is on the stupid Can't Cut list. Fuck that stupid list. Fuck it in the ear.
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Oh man, I have been in a long fuck*ng war with the fuck*ng can't cut list.
FUCK YOU CAN'T CUT LIST! FUCK YOU IN THE EAR WITH AN EAR-SHAPED fuck*ng DEVICE!
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Well this sucks. Nelson Cruz is going to be on the DL for the rest of our season. But can I drop him and add a productive player? Nooooooooo. Cruz is on the stupid Can't Cut list. Fuck that stupid list. Fuck it in the ear.
This here says he was just removed tonight.
http://help.yahoo.com/l/us/yahoo/sports/fantasysports/baseball/season/baseball-136.html
[/rushes to pick up any good players AW might actually want]
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Well that's good news. Thanks for letting me know.
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H/AB R HR RBI SB AVG
19/40 13 8 14 1 .475
Not a bad day at all.
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PLAYOFFS?!
You're talking PLAYOFFS?
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I said I wasn't going to complain about this, but I will anyway. Tonight was supposed to be the Return of Strasburg, and I have tickets for it, so it should be hell of exciting. But it's been raining all freakin' day here, and Intellicast is projecting 100% chance of rain on an hourly basis all night. The Nats, however, have said they won't make a decision right up until game time. I understand that on some level--it's late in the season and rainouts are increasingly difficult to make up, and it would screw up some other things.
But still. Do I want to haul ass into town to hang out in the rain for a while, then find out the game's being postponed?
Complicating matters: today was the first day of school here, so it would be nice to be home with the kiddos to find out how their days went. That's probably the clincher, there.
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Woo woo, your kids will start school, what, 11, 12 times. Strasburg is probably only going to get one more severe injury comeback before his career is done.
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Keith makes a compelling case. And I'm not a good example because I was a miserable little fuck, but I hated getting drilled about my first day back at school (or any day for that matter). And getting drilled to me was answering questions like "Hey son! How was your first day back? Do you like your teacher? Make any new friends?" It's not like I would be a dick right back, but I was not happy answering those completely reasonable questions. Jesus. My poor, poor parents. I owe them like so much money for pain and suffering. Again, that was me. A maladjusted self-loathing asshole. I'm sure your kids love it. (For the record, I love my parents, and look forward to discussing work and such with them when I visit home. I've overcome a few things. This was a long time ago).
My friend had tickets to Randy Johnson's perfect game but didn't go. Still kicking himself. And sure, the unused ticket may have greater monetary value if that happens, but nothing compared to the experience of watching a no-hitter or perfect game.
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Yeah man, Keith is right, you can catch up with the kids tomorrow.
Only 5 innings? They hardly ever go all the way anymore.
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Yeah, they got the game in somehow. The Strasburg portion of the game was awesome; the rest pretty well sucked. Meh, I'm not too upset about it.
I am going tonight, so this will be the night of long rain delays instead.
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Do people hold up "The Titanic Hit A Strausburg" signs at games?
I don't think anyone could argue Too Soon.
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OK, so TONIGHT's game may be postponed. The Twitter is saying it's been called already, but the Nats' web site doesn't say shit.
And of course this announcement comes just as the rain has stopped.
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Oooh, it gets better. Apparently the Nats and Dodgers agreed to call the game earlier this afternoon, and the Dodgers actually left the ballpark. But then someone from MLB got on the phone and said they really need to try to get the game in (for reasons unknown at this point). Apparently the Dodgers called some people and persuaded the players to come back to the stadium.
The Nats' web site still says the game is on, but nothing with a tone of "Despite what you may have heard, tonight's game is actually being played," it's just that the earlier previews and stuff never went away. Once again, round about 5 PM I'm going to have to decide if I'm going into the city or not.
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Playoffs round 1:
Banana Town 7, DERP 2
Fun on Mars 5, Oakey Blues 4
Semifinals this week:
Banana Town vs. Debauched Sloths
Fun on Mars vs. Mr. Mixed Pickles
Good luck all.
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I'm just gonna get smeared to hell this week, huh?
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I'm just gonna get smeared to hell this week, huh?
Oh shut up.
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Oh man, I think I sqqqqqqqqquuuueaked into the finals!
Well-fought, Martians!
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Banana Town 7, Debauched Sloths 3.
Mixed Pickles 6, Fun on Mars 4.
Fifth place: Oakey Blues 7, Derp 2.
Banana Town vs. Mr. Mixed Pickles for the champeenship. Sloths and Mars for third place. This one goes through the end of the regular season, next Wednesday the 28th rather than Sunday. Good luck all.
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Banana Town 7, Debauched Sloths 3.
Mixed Pickles 6, Fun on Mars 4.
Fifth place: Oakey Blues 7, Derp 2.
Banana Town vs. Mr. Mixed Pickles for the champeenship. Sloths and Mars for third place. This one goes through the end of the regular season, next Wednesday the 28th rather than Sunday. Good luck all.
Good job Mr. Mayor.
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3 home runs for Prince Fielder yesterday? Well, shit. I'm about ready to concede this thing.
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It seems that the me who SELECTS players for the roster is pretty good at this but the me who picks which of the guys to start each day keeps fuck*ng him over and keeps this close.
My GM skills are being undermined by my managerial skills and I'm hoping I can still squeak this out, leading in most of the categories but leading them by a wisp going into the last day.
We'll see.
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Yeah, at least the pain of falling from 2nd to 4th is assuaged by the Cardinals' amazing run to pick up the wild card.
Congrats Smets!
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Nice job, LFM. Well-deserved.
That's my second silver medal in four years, with a third-place finish in there too. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.
So the Braves and Red Sox missed the playoffs in heartbreaking fashion? What a shame.
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Nice job, LFM. Well-deserved.
That's my second silver medal in four years, with a third-place finish in there too. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.
So the Braves and Red Sox missed the playoffs in heartbreaking fashion? What a shame.
A damn shame. Tragic, really.
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So is it playoff time then? Alright. Does anybody have any favorite teams in the show?
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My favorite team didn't even get close, but my second favorite team is in. Tomorrow night it happens to be the Tigers, but depending how they do it could be a different team in the ALCS.
What Ash said.
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Once the Nats are over and done, I revert to my old Philly-fan ways.
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Go Cardinals! You've got the momentum!
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that was a great season of fake baseball! thank you all!
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Whoever plays the Yankees.
I too like to pull for an underdog.
Once the Nats are over and done, I revert to my old Philly-fan ways.
When that happens do you suddenly become an asshole?
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You bet. I throw batteries and puke on people.
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I too like to pull for an underdog.
Well, yeah, there is something about an underdog that really inspires the unexceptional.
(sorry, I took that from the office, which is now a show for unexceptional people to watch)
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I may be unexceptional, probably am, don't know, don't care. I know you didn't mean it though. You think I'm awesome!
The point I was making is I was trying to humorously point out that basically anyone that plays the Yankees is the underdog, that's why they are so hated because they are almost always at the top of the game. That changed for about a minute and a half when Bllly Beane learned how to play Moneyball (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moneyball). Of course now every team plays Moneyball and the Yankees have risen back to the top of the heap.
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The Yankees are hated for that reason and the fact that they outspend everyone else. I don't think they have the starting pitching to win it this year, though.
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Earlier in the week, a member of the Nats' fan community on Twitter asked "Who are you rooting for in the playoffs, since the Nats aren't in it?" And I couldn't answer, because if I said the Phillies, they'd all unfollow me.
But I guess I don't have that to worry about anymore. The Brewers have a hell of a squad, and unlike most Nats fans I actually like Nyjer Morgan. And the Tigers' first base coach is from my hometown. So, either of those.
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As others have said elsewhere, great game last night and great series so far. I am having trouble making up my mind who I'd rather see win.
In St. Louis' favor: I have more friends who are Cardinals fans than Rangers fans, including a very good friend of mine who I've been to like 8 or 10 ballparks with (he was at the game last night), so I'd like to see them happy. Also the Rangers are from Texas, specifically Dallas, which means I shouldn't like them (sorry Paul). Furthermore, the Rangers are a reincarnation of the Washington Senators, which further means I should hate them for stealing our team.
For the Rangers: And yet on some gut level, I find myself pulling for the Rangers. Their fan base has suffered for a long time, and I always have affinity for that. The Cardinals have much more recent success. Also, LaRussa is kind of a dick, and overrated.
Well, whatevs, I just hope for another good game tonight. Preferably one that's over by 11:30 or so.
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Also the Rangers are from Texas, specifically Dallas, which means I shouldn't like them (sorry Paul).
No apology necessary. You're preaching to the choir on that one.
LaRussa is kind of a dick, and overrated.
Yeah, every time the dude wins a championship they start talking about how great he is. Ha ha...
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Pitching staff is really lighting the world on fire tonight.
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Once the Cardinals stole last night, the Rangers have been pretty much fucked...
Carpenter's the only real Big Boy Ace between these two staffs and that matters a lot.
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CARDS WIN! CARDS WIN! CARDS WIN!
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hoo boy that was fun. Watched the first half while cooking stew at my friend's house. They had to take over because I kept wandering off to watch the game.
Then listened to part in the car on the way to a bar.
Then saw the last 2 innings at a bar filled with weird hipsters who were very excited about the game. Lots of cheering and kissing and stuff when they won. Very fun.
In St Louis, even the weird hipster bar patrons can quote you the batting averages of various players. Funny.
Read a thing this morning that I enjoyed. Some reporter was asking Earl Weaver why it's called the World Series when mostly only American teams compete.
"I didn't name it, but we beat everyone who showed up"
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To be fair, though there's only teams in America and Canada... all the best players in the Western Hemisphere are playing in the American majors and, more and more, the best players in east Asia are playing at least part of their careers here.
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Overshadowed by all this Penn State business: the Nationals' starting catcher has been kidnapped while playing winter ball in his home country of Venezuela.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/washington-nationals-catcher-wilson-ramos-kidnapped-in-venezuela/2011/11/09/gIQAS8tz6M_story.html?hpid=z2
Shit be fucked up today.
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Yeah, I heard that on the radio. Leave it to NPR to provide news on something other than the main thing going on Right Now.
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The cops raided the house where he was being held and got him out of there, so there's that.
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I'll give the Angels this:
When they see the Dodgers wounded, they pounce like motherfuckers.
Artie wants the Angels to be the top team in that market and he will spend every dime to his name if he thinks he'll get there.
$300 million dollars for an Albert Poo who says he's gonna be 32 and is probably gonna be 35 and... CJ Wilson is not the best use of funds on a strict baseball level?
But on a kicking the Dodgers in the kidneys while they lie dying kinda way, I see where this is coming from,
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Why are the Astros moving to the American League? That is some bullshit right there.
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Why are the Astros moving to the American League? That is some bullshit right there.
Because the MLB paid the new owner to agree to move them. Or paid the old owner or whatever.
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Need a little fantasy football help here. In my other league, I have actually made the playoffs. I have started Philip Rivers and the Baltimore defense all season, and they've both done well (from a fantasy scoring perspective). However, this coming week: Baltimore at San Diego. They are unlikely to BOTH have a good game. Either they'll both be mediocre, or one will score a ton of points at the expense of the other.
Backup QB is the 49ers' Alex Smith, who is at home with Pittsburgh. I have no other QBs or defenses on the roster, and the waiver wire is looking pretty crappy for QBs (Grossman, Gabbert, Hanie, guys like that). Defensively I have put a claim in on Denver.
Thoughts? Suggestions? I'm pretty well screwed, huh?
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Because the MLB paid the new owner to agree to move them. Or paid the old owner or whatever.
That figgers.
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As you may already know, I make a point to go to at least one new major league ballpark every season. I have been to at least one every year since 1995 (the exception being 2003 when we had our first kid), have now been to 32 big-league parks, and right now I only have 10 to go. (I've met Asherdan and Jough as the result of these trips in recent years.)
So I am trying to plan this season's trip, and I had been kicking around Minnesota. I have some friends there, my buddy in St. Louis who often accompanies me has friends there, they have a shiny new ballpark, and it's doable in a two-day/one-night trip.
HOWEVER. Friends-of-friends who I met in the last year live in the Phoenix area. The Arizona Snakes' ballpark has a motherfuck*ng swimming pool out beyond the right-field fence. You can go for a swim and watch the game all at once. Said friends just posted on Facebook that they got the pool suite for a game against the Dodgers in July, and tickets are $100 a stub for anyone who wants to come.
This is possibly a thing. I am not sure. It might be completely awesome. Or it might annoy the shit out of me. I am something of a baseball purist; I go to the game to watch the game. I once called Houston's ballpark a "Baseball-Centric Maximized Entertainment Experience™" (http://www.bigfool.com/foolblog/archive/2006_09.htm#000764) because it seemed like the game was secondary to all the other crazy crap going on (sorry Paul). So I might end up being all "th' hell, you swimming fools, I'm trying to watch the game here."
On the other hand, swimming pool at the ballpark. WTFN?
My first-degree friend of the people in Phoenix has already said he can't make it that weekend, so that's a strike against. Hmmmmm.
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I have a buddy at work who does that - and Houston is his home park.
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I hate Phoenix. Easy decision.
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I once called Houston's ballpark a "Baseball-Centric Maximized Entertainment Experience™" (http://www.bigfool.com/foolblog/archive/2006_09.htm#000764) because it seemed like the game was secondary to all the other crazy crap going on (sorry Paul).
My hatred of "The Juice Box" is well documented. I'm sure I've ranted about the place on numerous occasions up in here. Here's one (http://touamb.com/index.php/topic,3806.msg156413.html#msg156413)
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Hey Mayor! DO NOT GO TO THE PHOENIX AREA IN JULY.
The ballpark may be climate controlled but nowhere else is and it will be balls-hot.
No doubt. But I will have to go there sooner or later, if I want to hit all the ballparks eventually.
I think I'm sticking with the Twins this year, and if the Phoenix peeps get the pool again in the next year or two I'll make that happen then.
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I would hell of go to Phoenix, because, yeah, you got to go within the next ten years (I think others didn't quite get this) and right now it would be the shit (or at least a new experience).