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Author Topic: Movies you HATE  (Read 22753 times)

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AugustWest

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« Reply #60 on: December 01, 2005, 02:50:55 pm »

Fuck you, Jough. Unbreakable is Shamalayma's best movie.

Fuck you, Huang.  The first 3 Star Wars movies are a foundation of our culture!  Imagine how many 40 year old virgins there are out there as a result of those movies!

Fuck you, Ark!  Don't call Jough a prick.

Fuck you, Dawg! Because..., uh,  well just because.

Ahem.


What?  Oh, sorry, I thought it was Friday.
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V-Adore

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« Reply #61 on: December 01, 2005, 02:54:26 pm »

I think you'd better be watching out for Judas Priest, Aug.

Anyway, I have a shameful confession to make: I have not actually seen any of the M. Night Shyamawhatever films. (As someone in Western culture not living under a rock, I have been spoiled on Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, and Signs -- not the Village, but Village sounds like it's sort of pre-spoiler'd.) Are they worth pursuing, even if you know the ending?
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misterqueue

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« Reply #62 on: December 01, 2005, 02:57:52 pm »

Quote from: "V-Adore"
I think you'd better be watching out for Judas Priest, Aug.

Anyway, I have a shameful confession to make: I have not actually seen any of the M. Night Shyamawhatever films. (As someone in Western culture not living under a rock, I have been spoiled on Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, and Signs -- not the Village, but Village sounds like it's sort of pre-spoiler'd.) Are they worth pursuing, even if you know the ending?


No, and if you don't know the ending the answer is still the same.

HTH

[edited because I'm very tired and my spelling is 10 kinds of raunchy today]
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yu-huang

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« Reply #63 on: December 01, 2005, 03:45:49 pm »

"Unbreakable" is the best Batman movie ever made, and it isn't even about Batman (I now this doesn't make much sense, but it does, in my heart). When





[S P O I L E R S]



the film ends and that note comes up, you know, the one about the "asylum for the criminally insane"

[/S P O I L E R S]






I involuntarily let out a short chiuaua-like yip which fortunately went largely unnoticed; I was so happy, thinking "See? this guy cares!"
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Bozack

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« Reply #64 on: December 01, 2005, 03:51:36 pm »

I'm not sure if I already posted in here. I don't think so.

"Thirteen" was the most....ergh. It sucked SO MUCH COCK. Everything about that movie was awful. EVERYTHING.
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misterqueue

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« Reply #65 on: December 01, 2005, 04:01:08 pm »

Quote from: "Bozack"
I'm not sure if I already posted in here. I don't think so.

"Thirteen" was the most....ergh. It sucked SO MUCH COCK. Everything about that movie was awful. EVERYTHING.


Yes! Thank you for that!  I thought I was the only one at the time who thought that viewing that movie was akin to being RAPED IN MY EYEHOLE!
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Bozack

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« Reply #66 on: December 01, 2005, 04:05:16 pm »

Quote from: "misterqueue"
Yes! Thank you for that!  I thought I was the only one at the time who thought that viewing that movie was akin to being RAPED IN MY EYEHOLE!


Yes! EVERYONE ELSE LOVED IT! My friends were confused when I left the movie theater, after the main character's descent into decadence led her to become friends with gasp BLACK PEOPLE! Oh, the HUMANITY!
That movie was a fuck*ng LiveJournal with a budget.
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yu-huang

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« Reply #67 on: December 01, 2005, 04:09:25 pm »

Well, "Saw", of course.
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misterqueue

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« Reply #68 on: December 01, 2005, 04:17:59 pm »

Quote from: "Bozack"


Yes! EVERYONE ELSE LOVED IT! My friends were confused when I left the movie theater, after the main character's descent into decadence led her to become friends with gasp BLACK PEOPLE! Oh, the HUMANITY!
That movie was a fuck*ng LiveJournal with a budget.


Exactly!  I remember commenting to my friends "Well that happened to me but I wasn't as much of a pussy about it." at times, or "Yeah I did that.. didn't tons of kids do that like 10 years ago even?  Are we supposed to be shocked?"

And then the Fear of a Black Planet moment was just... fuck*ng mentally inept.. and backwards.  (Oooh.. she's listening to rap now... )  What is this people, the 80's or something?  Are we going to start suing Judas Priest for "killing children" again?

On that note my guilty pleasure movie is "Fear of a Black Hat", for one line basically:

"Shit, the hats're what it's all about! See, back when we was still slaves, the white man made the black man work in the fields. Heads totally exposed to the sun. So when the slaves got back from the fields, they was too tired to fight the white man. So what we're sayin' now is: Yo, we got some hats now muh-fuckas!"

Word.
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Beatrice

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« Reply #69 on: December 01, 2005, 04:33:10 pm »

Thirteen:

So one night in high school I went to the park with some friends, smoked them all up, and then walked with the boyfriend to the local theatre (the last one!) and went to see Thirteen.  Yes, on my tiny little budget I managed to waste both drug money and movie money by seeing the ONLY movie one should never see while high.  An hour or so in I just started sobbing basically because these girls were so dumb, and i hated them so much, but i had done enough stuff that they reminded me of me, and i cried because i was such a worthless piece of trash.  Then I came down and realized none of the previous made any damn sense and that I'd just had some sort of pointless breakdown, most likely because it was such a BAD MOVIE.  Also: the weed.


edit: one movie that you SHOULD see high is Constantine.  One night I watch SAW and Constantine bootlegs in my friend's living room, and I have a lot of trouble believing I would like either of these had this not been my mindset on first experience.  I know for damn sure I would hate SAW.  But since then I've seen Constantine maybe 5 times and liked it more every time.  And I never see movies that many times.  (ALso, has any one seen Thirteen Moons?  This shared a few of the smame actors and was set in the same creepy parts of L.A. so I thought they might be the same director or something, but they ain't.)

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« Reply #70 on: December 01, 2005, 05:45:37 pm »

I think I mentioned that I liked Unbreakable earlier in this thread, but I'm saying it again just to annoy Jough.  And did I ever thank whoever recommended Shaolin Soccer a long time ago?
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« Reply #71 on: December 01, 2005, 06:56:32 pm »

Quote from: "yu-huang"
"Unbreakable" is the best Batman movie ever made, and it isn't even about Batman


Oh, please.  Everyone knows the best Batman movie is Blade.

Unbreakable...good christ what a piece of shit.  Imagine watching Star Wars, and when Luke returns to Obi-Wan after seeing his family slaughtered, hearing Luke say "You know...I'm still not sure I'm ready to learn the ways of the Force."  And then they wander around Tatooine some more, and then half an hour later Obi-Wan asks Luke if he's ready, and Luke says "I don't know...."  And this just keeps going on and on and on until the last ten minutes of the movie, where we get the shitty twist ending.  

Terrible, terrible movie.  Shame on all involved.

Thirteen was an ABC Afterschool Special on crack, but the girl with the weird name ( Michael Tina Wood? )  was one hot little piece of underage ass.  Did I just say that?  I never said that.  I also never said that in three years, she should do a remake of Emmanuelle In Space with the girl from the Harry Potter movies.  That was not me who said that.  No.
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« Reply #72 on: December 01, 2005, 08:09:49 pm »

I have recommended Shaolin Soccer many times in the past (also, Kung Pow: Enter the Fist) but I don't know if I have have here or to you.

Unbreakable was also a case of blatant telegraphing to the target audience. You don't make a movie that will appeal to comic readers and expect them not to notice the guy who wears purple and black all the time. That villainous wardrobe is right up there with Ensign Expedable in terms of cliches.
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« Reply #73 on: December 02, 2005, 01:42:26 am »

I saw Air Bud IV:  Seventh Inning Fetch, but wait, this is a thread for movies you hated.  Nevermind.

~Paul
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jough

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« Reply #74 on: December 03, 2005, 12:07:31 am »

I liked Unbreakable better when it was called "The Dead Zone."

Seriously - is the guy's "super power" that he's unbreakable, or that he can Know What Evil Lurks in the Hearts of Men* just by touching them?

WTF?

And who didn't see the "twist" from a mile away?  It was so heavy-handed and obvious.



* Yeah, Unbreakable ripped off "The Shadow" too.

Thirteen was not a good movie, but that Rachel Wood girl is fuck*ng hot.  And still a minor?  Not in Pennsylvania she isn't!  Sixteen is the age of consent here.

It's only 14 in West Virginia.  It's 12 if you have her daddy's permission.
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