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[littlefallsmets]

Lately in my dreams, I am shifting back and forth between things actually happening to them and being an actor pretending they're happening to me on a set.

And invariably mixing up the two causing much trouble in the reality of the dream.

[theinevitable]

cockroaches climbing out of open wounds, leaking pus.

great.

[wombat]

So after literally decades of having that dream where I'm trying to take a shower in a strange place and I can't manage to do it - I finally did. And then I realized that I shouldn't have washed my hair because it was late in the afternoon and I was just going to have to wash it again in the morning.

[Arachno-capitalist]

I was hosting a poker game in a dark basement with a bunch of people I've encountered in my professional life who were dangerously incompetent or diabolically and maliciously self-centered. I tried leaving to go upstairs, out of the basement, and they were all there at another table at the top of the stairs. Their dumb faces were telling awful jokes and playing incomprehensible poker strategy to the point of being annoying.

[CortJstr]

I had my first elevator dream in a while. The elevator shot out the top of the building and I instantly looked at the capacity sign, turned away, and looked again. It didn't seem different and I just calmly said to myself "well if this isn't a dream then this couldn't be happening, elevators don't work like this in real life." And suddenly the elevator was back in the building opening its doors at the top floor normally.

So while I wasn't able to dream lucidly I was able to short-circuit the nightmare part.

[theinevitable]

Multiple times in the last week I have had dreams about hanging out with people I only know online. Not any about you guys, though. Only ladies from twitter. It feels weird.

[pmcd9]

What, we're not good enough to hang out with you in your dreams? Yeah, you're right, I'd rather hang out with bitches from Twitter too.

[theinevitable]

in one of the dreams I just showed up at this girl's house and waited around for her. Then she explained that this was really creepy, and I felt terrible.

[Arachno-capitalist]

I fell asleep at my home desk and woke up to a colleague, in my home, asking me where the flank steak was. I told I didn't know where the flank steak was, or why there would even be some flank steak just laying around and he got really agitated. Started asking me about chutney and hanger steaks. Then he picked up a cat (not mine, just a cat that happened to be in the room) and complained it was going to be a pain to skin and dress the cat just for a decent lunch and walked out. Then I looked down at the manual on my desk and it was in a totally nonsense language that moved around on the page when I tried to read it.

[miles]

DO YOU WANT SOME CHUTNEY?

[theinevitable]

...that my cool artist friend decided her next project was a kid, and she wanted me to be the dad. She had a whole complicated plan about how the kid was going to be raised, schools, food, activities, particular jobs for friends of ours (such and such guy teaches painting, such and such girl teaches guitar). The only thing not mentioned was whether we were going to make the kid the old fashioned way. So of course the dream was mostly me wondering whether that was gonna happen.

[Carlos del Vaca]

I have a disproportionate number of dreams about public transit. About being in a subway system and not being able to figure out which train to get on, which side of the tracks to get on, which way to go.

I wonder if that's a metaphor for anything.

[pmcd9]

It was shortly after the end of the war and I was a Confederate soldier trying to find my way back home. I came upon a camp at a landing by a river. There was an old lady with a bunch of children gathered around a table outside. She had a pot of something she was cooking. She fed us starving men. She even served us the last of her hams even though she didn't know where her next meal was coming from either.

Fast forward, it's after dinner and I'm sitting on the bench looking out into a clearing. I'm watching two young girls riding hobby hosss. I hear the sound of guitars being tuned so I turn and walk toward the sound. I walked around a couple of old cars and a large truck hooked to a long trailer. On the other side I found the old lady leading a band of misfit soldiers. The drummer, whose legs were blown off at the knees, sat on a low stool so he could reach the pedals with his leg stumps. They were all wearing matching Nudie Suits that vaguely resembled rebel uniforms. They broke into a rendition of The Weight that was so beautiful I woke up feeling euphoric.

[theinevitable]

I was at work alone and this awful customer who stresses me out ordered two drinks. He listed a ton of attributes and got very mad when I asked which drink was skim, which was decaf, etc. He just kept rattling it off so fast and wouldn't slow down or let me write it down, and then he left and said "I'll be back in a minute." I kept getting them mixed up, and at one point I got so frustrated that I threw them at the wall and had to start over. Meanwhile all these people were calling out new orders to me, and they were all the friendly customers who I like, and were confused about why I was acting so rude and ignoring them.

THEN I remembered he was also my professor for a class, and I had to write a paper about coffee drinks for him, so I was trying to write about his order while I made it but everything was getting cold and I forgot what flavor the second drink was and oh god here he comes and

then I woke up because my alarm was going off. Time to go to work!

this was a nearly accurate representation of this guy. he gets the same thing every time, but only comes in once a month or so, and gets really pissy if I don't remember what he wants. Obviously by now I remember, but it took a while because, I mean, come on, every customer gets some combination of the same ingredients. He also yelled at my coworker and demanded that he "admit" that he had coughed on his drink. He didn't want a new drink, which we offered him, he wanted the guy to "admit that he lied" about coughing. When he did that I purposely burnt his drink, which I have never done, and he said it was the best drink he'd ever had and started asking for me to make it that way every time. ass.

(side note: when you burn a mocha it tastes like when I make hot chocolate on my stove. I guess my hot chocolate technique needs some work.)

[wombat]

The whole deal with writing a paper about coffee for a class is hilarious.

You know burnt chocolate is not always a bad thing. There's this recipe I make for bread rolls with dark chocolate inside and usually a couple break open and a little chocolate leaks out and there'll be these little lumps of chocolate burnt on the bottom, and they are the best part of the whole thing.