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[jay-ell]

I had a dream recently that I turned down a threesome with the two hottest girls from my high school, because I remembered that I had a girlfriend. My girlfriend did not find this dream as flattering as I wanted her to.

I never have sex dreams, so it is kind of disappointing that I missed out on some awesome dream-sex.
I think I have literally had one dream where I had sex, ever, and that was when I was much much younger and it was weird and not like what sex is like.
I am pretty sure it was still when my understanding of sex was "you lie on top of her, and eventually some stuff comes out if you stay there long enough."

I used to have sex dreams all the time, but now the best I seem to be able to muster is dreams where I could be having sex with random hotties if only I weren't married, or -- even worse -- dreams where I could be having sex with my hot, hot spouse, if only I didn't have kids.

Such is life.

[jaydub]

Thats a lot better than what my first understanding of sex was.

In summer school between my Freshman and Sophomore years of HS a classmate was under the impression that sex involved urinating inside the woman.  Either he hadn't hit puberty or he was watching some weird German porn was all I could figure.  I had the basic facts down by age 8, since my pet mice engineered a population explosion, and stuff started getting messy for me sometime in 7th grade.

[Drygioni]

Might as well spill. I had a sex dream involving a member of this board.



A MALE member of this board.

I am not a massive sex-dream person so I hope you feel flattered somewhere in the recesses of your mind.

As for 'what sex is like' when you're a kid, I asked, nay BEGGED my parents to explain to me how it all worked at the age of 6. After much persistence, Papa Judy said 'there's a special cuddle and then the dad does a special wee and a baby is born', cue both parents bursting out laughing whilst I sat there nonplussed.

I genuinely hold an unholy terror for the day one of my mates remembers the time two years later I announced this story to the class.

[littlefallsmets]

It is okay that you dreamed of my special wee, Jude.

I am flattered whenever anyone dreams of my special wee.

[Doc]

A MALE member of this board.

The sound you can hear is JL's heart breaking.
Although if it was Nabrush that doesn't count, we've all been there man.

[littlefallsmets]

...though, remember, JL's fella is a member of the board.

That might be like SUPER hot to her.

[jay-ell]

The sound you can hear is JL's heart breaking.

So true.

...though, remember, JL's fella is a member of the board.

That might be like SUPER hot to her.

Hope springs eternal!

[AugustWest]

Might as well spill. I had a sex dream involving a member of this board.



A MALE member of this board.

Did it involve one of you squealing like a pig?

[side_show]

I had a dream that I got a new, large, open-concept condo, only I filled it with so many bookshelves full of trashy best sellers that it was like a rat maze. 

I was watching a TV show where a couple was shopping for a condo before I went to bed.  Huh.

[pmcd9]

This one was a weirdie...

I was on a road walking.  There were others on the road with me.  It was olden days, like biblical times or something.  I was trying to catch up to the Pope who was also walking along the road.  I had a question for him about something which I've forgotten.  It had something to do with sex, I think.  Just as I got to the Pope he tripped and fell to the ground.  I helped him up and asked him my question (which I've forgotten).  it seems like his answer wasn't very direct, but it was helpful.  So now we're in the village and I'm surrounded by Jews.  They start giving me advice concerning my problem in that way that you only see in a Hollywood musical .  And of course they broke into song.  So imagine these Jewish peasants straight out of Fiddler on the Roof singing a song about inappropriate touching.  There was one man leading a donkey who placed his hand on the arm of a woman carrying a load of straw.  He sang something to her at which she replied in song "please don't touch me."  Variations on this his scenario were repeated several times before the chorus joined in to hammer the lesson home as we walked toward a beautiful sunrise.  Then the credits began to roll like at the beginning of a movie "Shlemiel Lends a Helping Hand" or something to that effect "copyright XXVect..." superimposed upon the sky and I was seeing it as if it were actually in the sky, because of course I was in the movie not watching it.

Then I woke up.

[jay-ell]

I had a dream that I was on the verge of Maximum Cuddles with a cross between James Marsters and A Guy I Knew In College, which is not actually much of a stretch. (You can't tell from the headshots, but they have similar body types, favor shirts that are tight and/or sleeveless, and both used to be platinum-blonde but have since let their hair go back to natural brown. I was with the platinum-blonde version.) Anyway, there I was, moments away from ecstasy, and we realized neither of us had a condom. So he ran out to get one, and by the time he got back I had remembered that I was married, and I couldn't go through with it.

Even after remembering Pedro, I was tempted, but ultimately, I did the right thing.

So. Disappointing. Where's a lucid dream when you need one?

So, my subconscious made it up to me last night. I still didn't get to screw him, but at least we made out a lot. Second base FTW.

This time, though, it was just Guy From College -- not the famous-actor blend I got last time. I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse.

[side_show]

I had a dream I was wandering aimlessly somewhere in they city.  It was dark and I was riding my bike down suburban streets wet from rain, although it was not raining at that moment.  The streetlights reflected off the road as I drove my bike along, and it was very quiet out.  Then I noticed there was a riot going on a couple blocks from me - a crowd of angry people, some with smoldering torches - so I decided to go into a nearby small hair salon to avoid the hassle.  Inside, Asian women worked on customers.  I asked for a facial, and sat down to get it done.  The esthetician tsk-tsked at me and told me that with the amount of black heads on my face it would be $300-$400 for her to get them all off.  I said that was too bad, because I really wanted to be rid of them, then asked her how much it would be for just a basic mini-facial, and she said with my skin it would still be around $300.  I said that unfortunately I couldn't afford that, then as I prepaired to go, I mentioned that there was a riot going on just down the street, and one of the other staff mentioned she new about this too.  There was some speculation as to why the riot was going on, but no one was really sure.  I felt pretty indifferent about both the fact I wasn't getting a facial and that I was about to head out into a riot, but I prepaired to leave anyway.

The overall emotional climate of the dream was that of ambivalence- I didn't care where I was going on my bike when I came upon the riot, I didn't feel any concern beyond mild frustration at the riot or the facial I could not afford.  I was mildly frustrated upon leaving the salon that I would need to ride my bike through the riot, but only because all the people would slow me down a bit.  It's not that I had anywhere to go.

This was a pretty unique dream for me, due both to the tone and content.  Especially of note is that I had had a conversation with my husband earlier that evening about how healthy and soft my skin is these days, making it particularly odd that I would dream of having bad skin.

[linnea]

I have been so sick that I missed the past 2 days of work. Last night, it was so bad that I took NyQuil. I vaguely remember waking up in the middle of the night thrashing and straining to breathe. I had a dream that somebody poured my lungs full of burning sand. I had lots of other weird dreams thanks to the Big N, little y, and Big fuck*ng Q, but that was the only one I could remember.

[iron_felix]

Back in the summer of 2006 I was trying to train myself to have lucid dreams, and typed up whatever I could remember from my dreams right after waking up.  I still have about a half-dozen of them saved on my laptop, long forgotten until this thread jogged my memory.  They're kind of stream-of-consciousness, and probably too long to post here unedited, but I'll put up summaries of some of them.  Here's one for one of the shorter ones:

Night of Thursday, June 15th, 2006

I was going to my high school prom with some friends (one of whom I didn't actually meet until college), but I didn't have a date.  It was the day of the prom, and I drove to the house where my best friend in 2nd grade used to live, where there were supposed to be people I could ask out.  For some reason I just kind of dithered around out front and never met anybody.

At this point in the dream I completely forgot about getting a date.  I decided my car (a Chevy Prizm) was too lame to drive to prom in, but I had some sort of keychain-mounted device that used an invisible ray to alter the length and width of different surfaces.  I used it on the Prizm to stretch out the chassis, and it started to turn into this huge '50s hotrod with sharkfin tail lights and everything.  Then I started to work on the front side of the car and realized I'd done it in reverse and the sharkfins were on the front hood.  Oops.

I couldn't be bothered to fix it so I started over on an old VW bus belonging to some random, unnamed friend.  This one started turning into a Rolls-Royce sort of car, but I never got to finish because my friends drove up and told me the prom was over now, even though it was still afternoon.  I was in trouble because the friend who owned the VW bus was really proud of it, and I'd never be able to get it back to exactly the way it was before, but then I pushed another button on the device and the car deflated like a balloon and folded up back into its original shape.

[AugustWest]

some sort of keychain-mounted device that used an invisible ray to alter the length and width of different surfaces.  I used it on the Prizm to stretch out the chassis, and it started to turn into this huge '50s hotrod with sharkfin tail lights and everything.  Then I started to work on the front side of the car and realized I'd done it in reverse and the sharkfins were on the front hood.  Oops.

I need one of those keychains!

On second thought, sounds like the perfect Christmas present for Paul...