The OFFICIAL Unofficial Achewood Message Board
Trivial Pursuits => Wild Card => Topic started by: Muse_Of_Fire on February 22, 2007, 04:27:38 am
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I'm sure you've all done this before, and maybe it will be a bust here since you all seem to know eachother so well, but here's how it works.
You post three things about yourself. Two are true, one is not. The next person to post tries to guess which statement was untrue, and posts two truths and a lie of his/her own.
1. I've partied with Chuck Berry.
2. I have a tattoo.
3. I speak 5 languages.
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I'm going to guess #3, but only because I fully expect you to come back saying you speak 6 languages or something.
1) I like celebrity magazines, but hide them when people come over.
2) I got caught stealing live giraffe from the pet department at Wal-Mart.
3) I smile at strangers, especially grouch old people, just to fuck with them.
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Ms. Show, I'm going with... Door Number 2, just because...
If you're gonna shoplift giraffe, there's gotta be better places to get them from than Wal-Mart.
I've checked out the Wal-Mart giraffe. Those are some sickly-ass giraffe.
Ms. Fire, I'm going with... Door Number 2, just because...
I find tattoos weird and would like to hear a story about chillin' with Chuck Berry.
1.) The only time I was an extra, I ended up in the trailer, lookin' fat all over the teevee ads.
2.) I operated a crude whiskey still in my junior year dormatory.
3.) David Arquette totally owes me for the cleaning of my favourite jacket.
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1.) The only time I was an extra, I ended up in the trailer, lookin' fat all over the teevee ads.
Truth
2.) I operated a crude whiskey still in my junior year dormatory.
The lie
3.) David Arquette totally owes me for the cleaning of my favourite jacket.
Truth - I think I remember this from earlier discussions
My three:
1. I have a second degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do
2. I have an IQ of 155
3. I played flute in the Sydney Opera House
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Hee! I forgot to mention: after someone guesses, you post the answer. Then it's up to you whether or not to guess on theirs and post three more statements about yourself, or to just post your answer and leave it for someone else to guess. Since it's just Side_show and I right now, I'm going to post what my lie was, and leave Side_show's three statements for someone else to guess. Otherwise it will be just the two of us and then it's no fun for anyone else. :)
Oh hey... I guess Mets posted in between. But I'll leave those items for someone else to guess.
Mets, nicely done. My lie was #2. I do not have a tattoo because I fear commitment too much to get one. The idea of inking my body, I can see the allure and I can kind of dig it. But the fact that it's permanent? That's my big beef. It's easier to get rid of a marriage than a tattoo, it seems, and that level of permanence terrifies me.
And your wish is my command:
I partied with Chuck Berry when I worked at the G8 Summit in Denver several years ago. He was one of the performers at the big gala. I also got to meet several heads-of-state from the G8 nations and many other performers (Kool & The Gang and Eartha Kitt among them... that was freaking awesome). Chuck was a party animal. He was a total horndog for Eartha Kitt backstage, and then at the after-party, he was sitting in this huge booth at the bar, totally surrounded by hot babes; like women in their 20s with, as they're known around here, "rude titties." It was awesome. :)
And I do, sadly, only speak 5 languages. I can read 7 total, but I can only speak 5.
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It is correct that I did not operate a whiskey still in college.
I was, however, involved in running a roaming craps game.
We built a whole little craps table and everything, all the lines and numbers and everything.
Just wandered around, scamming rubes for beer money.
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LFM - you are correct in your choice, but not your reasoning. All I can tell you is that if you hate a company enough, you can get away with anything.
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1) I once found a piece of graffiti depicting the Gauss-Bonnet Theorem. It was on a broken wall on the beach in San Francisco.
2) I once lived at a house for more than a year before finding out where the dumpster was. It turned out it was in the driveway, and I had walked right by it every day.
3) I am a girl.
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1) I once found a piece of graffiti depicting the Gauss-Bonnet Theorem. It was on a broken wall on the beach in San Francisco.
2) I once lived at a house for more than a year before finding out where the dumpster was. It turned out it was in the driveway, and I had walked right by it every day.
3) I am a girl.
Alternate: I call bullshit on door number three. Based upon this post (http://touamb.com/index.php?action=post;topic=3292.msg80640;quote=80640;sesc=d1d6da555021012cd4c10753b6278b0e), I think you're a dude.
1) I have been within arms-length of Prince, and my hands could probably span his waist.
2) I've given 98 IVs as a medic and been in two boat fires as a firefighter.
3) I have an insane fear of people touching my stomach.
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1. I have a second degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do
2. I have an IQ of 155
3. I played flute in the Sydney Opera House
I'm going to say three is a lie. It's the choice that fits the least with my mental image of you, although you could have carefully selected a truth that seems out of character. But no, I'd believe that you play flute, but if you'd done so in the Sydney Opera House I think it would have come up earlier. Unless you broke into the Sydney Opera House to play flute after hours.
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Yes, from glancing through Alternate's posts, Alternate appears to most likely be a guy... though I suppose the door has been left a crack open for being a lady who is into ladies. Which is fine by me. I've never really figured out what women could be attracted to about a dude.
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1. I am a vegetarian.
2. I am a History major.
3. I have more than 10 dollars.
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damn, Keith, those all seem like lies to me.
1. I am having a problem related to A Girl and Having a Girlfriend. (how can you resist a girl who is not only beautiful, but also confesses her love for Superman and Star Wars? My friend's response was "don't. Marry her.")
2. I probably spent more money buying posters and shit for my room than I have spent on (off-campus) food all school-year. I don't regret this.
3. I found a kind of beer that I like.
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1. I am having a problem related to A Girl and Having a Girlfriend. (how can you resist a girl who is not only beautiful, but also confesses her love for Superman and Star Wars? My friend's response was "don't. Marry her.")
2. I probably spent more money buying posters and shit for my room than I have spent on (off-campus) food all school-year. I don't regret this.
3. I found a kind of beer that I like.
Despite my love for all sorts of beers, I feel that 3 is your lie, if only because you posted so little about it.
1. I am a vegetarian.
2. I am a History major.
3. I have more than 10 dollars.
Uh... I guess 1 only because I know a vegetarian. I really have no starting point here.
For me:
1. I smoke cigarettes sometimes but don't like people to know that I do because I feel guilty about it.
2. I am a hypochondriac and think I have all sorts of mental diseases.
3. I have a tattoo of M.C. Escher's Drawing Hands on my back.
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Alternate: I call bullshit on door number three. Based upon this post (http://touamb.com/index.php?action=post;topic=3292.msg80640;quote=80640;sesc=d1d6da555021012cd4c10753b6278b0e), I think you're a dude.
1) I have been within arms-length of Prince, and my hands could probably span his waist.
2) I've given 98 IVs as a medic and been in two boat fires as a firefighter.
3) I have an insane fear of people touching my stomach.
I'll say #2 because 98 seems low. IIRC you were doing EMT stuff before moving to a place that only has 98 total people.
1. A former Secretary of State has thrown spit balls at me.
2. I am a recreational pilot
3. It is not yet 10am and I have looked at the unclothed breasts of over 100 different women for work.
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1. A former Secretary of State has thrown spit balls at me.
2. I am a recreational pilot
3. It is not yet 10am and I have looked at the unclothed breasts of over 100 different women for work.
Tough one. They're all a bit to weird to be made up. I'm going to say #2 is the lie.
1. I played CBGB's in NYC.
2. I was interviewed to be on an MTV Networks show about people with weird and obsessive hobbies, but didn't make the cut because I wasn't weird enough.
3. I have an entry in the IMDB.
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Tough one. They're all a bit to weird to be made up. I'm going to say #2 is the lie.
1. I played CBGB's in NYC.
2. I was interviewed to be on an MTV Networks show about people with weird and obsessive hobbies, but didn't make the cut because I wasn't weird enough.
3. I have an entry in the IMDB.
3 is the obvious lie because there's no entry for Carlos DelVaca, but that's too easy so it has to be a trick. I think I will go with #2.
1. I handle poison dart frogs with my bare hands at least twice a week.
2. I turned down a chance to go to graduate school at MIT (although I was definitely weird enough).
3. I once showed an armadillo to Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Connor.
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Tough one. They're all a bit to weird to be made up. I'm going to say #2 is the lie.
Correct. My dad is a recreational pilot.
#1 was Lawrence Eagleburger. I saw him at (and some other people I forget the names of) speak at summer camp between 9th and 10th grades.
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I'm going to say three is a lie. It's the choice that fits the least with my mental image of you, although you could have carefully selected a truth that seems out of character. But no, I'd believe that you play flute, but if you'd done so in the Sydney Opera House I think it would have come up earlier. Unless you broke into the Sydney Opera House to play flute after hours.
In fact, I have no idea what my IQ is. I attended K-6 grade in New South Wales and apparently the educational system there doesn't (or didn't) believe in IQ testing. All my American-educated acquaintances seem to have gone through it at some point - although I've never heard anyone claim less than 120 (possibly those with less inflate the figures).
I participated in the school orchestra, which numbered about 50. There were 5 flautists, I was about 4th best. We had a little concert with parents, friends, school officials and the like (which still numbered enough for the floor and galleries in a smaller hall to be filled). This was 1978 or so. I'm continually appalled by how minimalist American primary education seems in comparison.
Three more, in keeping with Muse's outline:
1) I have a M.S. in Biology
2) I'm a guardian for a special-needs child
3) I brew enough beer that I haven't needed to buy a six pack in over 2 years.
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3 is the obvious lie because there's no entry for Carlos DelVaca, but that's too easy so it has to be a trick. I think I will go with #2.
Bzzzt! Carlos del Vaca is a nom de plume. There is an entry in IMDB under my real name, but it's not me.
A friend recommended me for the VH1 freak show for the Mascot Photos (http://www.bigfool.com/mascots), but when I talked to the producer guy on the phone, he was like "This is interesting and funny, but you sound pretty normal, and you haven't gone to absurd lengths to get any of these pictures." I guess to qualify, I should have tracked the San Diego Chicken to his house and camped outside.
I did give permission for those same mascot photos to be used in a forthcoming baseball documentary. I'm hoping they credit me as "Mascot Guy" or something, and I'll get my IMDB entry that way.
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Alternate: I call bullshit on door number three. Based upon this post (http://touamb.com/index.php?action=post;topic=3292.msg80640;quote=80640;sesc=d1d6da555021012cd4c10753b6278b0e), I think you're a dude.
Your link isn't working for me, is this (http://touamb.com/index.php/topic,3292.msg80640.html#msg80640) the one you mean? It's funny, I thought that post would give me away, because it's actually a description of what I was like in high school. When talking about girls I said things like "the isolation they feel" instead of "the isolation we feel" because I wanted to come off as androgynously as possible, but I felt kind of transparent doing it. Like, "I have this, uh... friend... who has surreal sets of obscure interests. And I have- I mean, my friend has hopelessly tangled interior monologues..."
Yes, from glancing through Alternate's posts, Alternate appears to most likely be a guy... though I suppose the door has been left a crack open for being a lady who is into ladies. Which is fine by me. I've never really figured out what women could be attracted to about a dude.
Oh, I like dudes, too. It's just that A) the hotness of dudes doesn't come up as often as does the hotness of ladies in either the comic or the forum, and B) I've avoided talking about my ex-boyfriends because I didn't want folks to assume I was a chick. (Obviously dudes can like dudes, but even the most enlightened people frequently tend to assume others are straight until proven otherwise.) It's not that I wanted to deceive people, it's just that when I meet people in real life my gender/sex is one of the first things they learn about me. I sometimes feel like that's a little weird because it's such an inconsequential part of my personality. I don't have a problem with my gender, but it's kind of like the color of a rental car I had no say in choosing. It's like if I had a mole on my foot, and for some reason I was required to wear a huge sign saying "I have a mole on my foot," and when people met me they immediately read the sign and sometimes made conclusions based on it. If this were the case, and if I were going to introduce myself to the internet, I might want to give people a chance to get to know me a little before telling them about the mole.
But yeah, 1) is a lie, and 3) is the truth. I've never seen the Gauss-Bonnet Theorem graffitied, and I've certainly never seen it on a broken wall at the beach in san francisco. Although I think that if this did happen it might be one of the high points of my life.
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3. I once showed an armadillo to Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Connor.
Please tell me this is true. I have a mild obsession with Sandra Day O'Connor - she was my childhood hero and currently occupies prime real estate on my dorm room door.
I'm too new, I think, to posit on which one of those is a lie or to post two truths and a lie myself - I would guess #2 because of the qualifier.
But if that story is true, I had to put in a request that you post it and explain please!
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coldfrog, you are right! Beer keeps tricking me, though. The first sip is always good. Everything after that is horrible.
Um...
1 I am an Art History major (or rather, I plan to be.)
2 Bonus Follow Up: the girl I mentioned in #1 previously is a girl y'all -thought- was my girlfriend.
3 I never really liked listening to John Coltrane until today.
Jaydub-- I am going to guess that #1 is the lie. Just because the other two seem like strange things to lie about.
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Please tell me this is true. I have a mild obsession with Sandra Day O'Connor - she was my childhood hero and currently occupies prime real estate on my dorm room door.
Sorry, this is the lie - I only passed through the room while someone else showed her an armadillo. I did once get to show Robert De Niro a naked mole rat, though.
#2 is true. I could have studied with Steven Pinker, (http://pinker.wjh.harvard.edu/) author of bestselling books on the mind and charter member of the Luxiuriant Flowing Hair Club for Scientists. (http://www.improb.com/projects/hair/hair-club-top.html) But I chose otherwise.
#1 is of course completely true. Dart frogs in captivity are not toxic, since their toxins come from their diet in the wild.
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Sorry, this is the lie - I only passed through the room while someone else showed her an armadillo. I did once get to show Robert De Niro a naked mole rat, though.
#2 is true. I could have studied with Steven Pinker, (http://pinker.wjh.harvard.edu/) author of bestselling books on the mind and charter member of the Luxiuriant Flowing Hair Club for Scientists. (http://www.improb.com/projects/hair/hair-club-top.html) But I chose otherwise.
#1 is of course completely true. Dart frogs in captivity are not toxic, since their toxins come from their diet in the wild.
But you have shown an armadillo to JL and me. And we're way cooler than some Supreme Court Justice. I'm not going to pretend to be cooler than DeNiro, though.
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I'm not going to pretend to be cooler than DeNiro, though.
You have been in fewer bad movies though!
Possibly unfair to DeNiro since he's been in an awful lot of good movies and been incredibly good in them, but he has chosen some real stinkers!
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It's funny, I thought that post would give me away, because it's actually a description of what I was like in high school.
Hm. In retrospect, I would see how you'd think others would think you were "protesting too much" with that phrasing. But... hopefully it bespeaks the community here well that... we never thought to analyze such a statement at anything other than face value.
This doesn't seem to be one of those message board communities where everyone's trying to suss out each other's ages/genders/locations for the purposes of trying to maybe kinda sorta pooooosssssssibly set up a sex hook-up.
And thank Christ for that, y'know? The board I used to post most at for years (decades in internet time) I've sort of pulled away from, specifically because it has devolved into a bunch of people trying to giraffe for romances and dramas and intrigues and so on. And it blows. Blows massive amounts of diseased bison.
Whereas here is, like, genuinely about talking about a really unique comic strip and... by extension... all sorts of neat fucked-up topics that spin out of those discussions.
And because of that... no one thinks to Sherlock what set of parts someone is carrying around in their Dockers unless the subject directly comes up.
Which is one of the many reasons this is an Awesome Place.
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Theinev: yep, you're right. Other than sucking at the game I have no defense for why I put those up there. Process of elimination was pretty simple given what I posted.
My level of formal education is my terrible secret, and (other than the fact that I love my job) is one big reason why I haven't hopped around more companies.
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Possibly unfair to DeNiro since he's been in an awful lot of good movies and been incredibly good in them, but he has chosen some real stinkers!
DeNiro actually seemed like a really nice regular person, which was the only reason I let him touch the mole rat, which is actually not allowed. But I don't know if his taste in people is any better than his taste in scripts - he had this whole entourage of odd family and vacuous stupid movie people in tow. Including the one who was wearing a fur coat, clearly oblivious to the enormous faux pas that this would constitute when asking for special favors from zookeepers.
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I'll say #2 because 98 seems low. IIRC you were doing EMT stuff before moving to a place that only has 98 total people.
Correct...although truthfully, I have only performed far fewer sticks than 98...I've only accomplished about 32 IV sticks in my lifetime. I did not do any EMS/Fire until I moved to Alaska. I only got certified to perform IV sticks in November 2006.
Also, I have never been IN a boat fire. We've had two since I've lived here and been certified as a firefighter, but I was not on call either of those nights. I've stayed up on night watch afterwards as security for a boat that was gutted in a fire until the fire marshal could come out and do inspections for arson, but I've never actually been a firefighter in a boat fire.
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1 I am an Art History major (or rather, I plan to be.)
2 Bonus Follow Up: the girl I mentioned in #1 previously is a girl y'all -thought- was my girlfriend.
3 I never really liked listening to John Coltrane until today.
I say one is the lie. Two and three are both things you would say in your signature, and I don't remember ever seeing you talk about non-achewood visual art.
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damn, you got me.
Basically I am going through a thing lately where suddenly I really like visual art. it's strange. I fantasized for almost a full 24 hours that I was going to transfer to the architecture school.
also, my Modern Art class is fuck*ng awesome.
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1. I am a vegetarian.
2. I am a History major.
3. I have more than 10 dollars.
Is this the only one unsettled right now? Got to be 1, no doubt.
Ok, here are some:
1. I ate brick-oven pizza with Kobe Bryant two days before his rape scandal.
2. I was to play cello in a concert for Kofi Annon, but Kofi didn't show up.
3. After being frisked, I had a bottle of orange juice confiscated at Yankee Stadium.
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Mine was number 3. I only have 9 dollars and some change until next friday.
As for you, ***** god, I am going to guess 1.
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3. It is not yet 10am and I have looked at the unclothed breasts of over 100 different women for work.
Some follow-up on this truthful point would be appreciated - particularly given the achewood storyline at present.
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Some follow-up on this truthful point would be appreciated - particularly given the achewood storyline at present.
It's actually not hot at all. I also picked the word unclothed over naked for a reason. Because all of the breasts were black and white and see-through (http://www.fda.gov/cdrh/mammography/mqsa-rev.html)
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Corts job involves pissed off squished titties. For a good cause, though.
Automation_Deity I ain't buying #2 'cause we all know Kofi is a hard rocker.
I was going to post three but damn, do I suck at it right now.
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Did we get everyone's? Someone needs to post three more!
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Nope, you're both wrong. High school string orchestra played a September 11th tribute show but Kofi didn't show up and not many other people did either. And for Kobe, yep, I was buying a bowl in the city and right around the block was some 'voted-best-in-the-city' brick oven pizza place that my foodie friend had to visit. - I hate that, every single eatery in Manhattan is voted the best of something. Best hot dog stand on the west side, best feta cheese in the city, best falafel at 4am, stfu - Anyway, Kobe was there with three Italian bodyguards. We expressed our dissapointment that the rims on his Escalade were stock, but it belonged to the limo company. The pizza was nothing special.
Shea made me chug a Snapple, but I know better than to bring OJ to the Bronx.
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Did we get everyone's? Someone needs to post three more!
Oh, not even close. Some of them must not be following the thread...
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1. I have a cousin who dated Hunter S. Thompson in high school.
2. I have no toenail on my left big toe.
3. I own a painting entitled "Smurfs in Auschwitz".
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1. I have a cousin who dated Hunter S. Thompson in high school.
2. I have no toenail on my left big toe.
3. I own a painting entitled "Smurfs in Auschwitz".
Got to be 2, since I don't think that's even possible.
Hunter from Kentucky, so that's plausible, and who wouldn't buy Smurfs in Auschwitz?
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I believe that if you drop something really heavy on your toe, it can kill the toenail and it turns all black and falls out and such.
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This doesn't seem to be one of those message board communities where everyone's trying to suss out each other's ages/genders/locations for the purposes of trying to maybe kinda sorta pooooosssssssibly set up a sex hook-up.
And thank Christ for that, y'know? The board I used to post most at for years (decades in internet time) I've sort of pulled away from, specifically because it has devolved into a bunch of people trying to giraffe for romances and dramas and intrigues and so on. And it blows. Blows massive amounts of diseased bison.
Whereas here is, like, genuinely about talking about a really unique comic strip and... by extension... all sorts of neat fucked-up topics that spin out of those discussions.
And because of that... no one thinks to Sherlock what set of parts someone is carrying around in their Dockers unless the subject directly comes up.
Which is one of the many reasons this is an Awesome Place.
Yeah, you are right, this place does seem awesome, with good things like respect and legitimate content on fucked up topics. Thanks for the reminder, though.
And now I will go again.
1) When I was thirteen I was so obsessed with accumulating useless beatles trivia that, whenever I went over to a friend's house, I would find their parents' white album and memorize the serial number.
2) When I was eight I was so obsessed with math class that I would sometimes do my homework twice.
3) I once sang for the pope.
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3.
because the other 2 are things that would lead you to posting here.
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Trust me. It *is* possible to lose a toenail. I've done it many times.
Carry on.
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Yeah, but they come back eventually. That ain't lost in my books.
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Yes, toenails can be resilient little buggers. When I was a kid I had ingrown toenails so bad that I had to wear crutches, and even when I had part of the nail surgically removed the doctors had to apply some special chemical to keep it from growing back. I have also grown back about half a toenail after trapping it in a door. It might be different if the whole thing comes off, though.
My apologies for grossing everybody out. I'm not really sure why I even wrote all of that. Anyway, here's one of my own:
1. For about five months last year I had a Hitler mustache.
2. I have sung the national anthem at a Major League ballgame.
3. At the age of four, I was run over by a man on a unicycle.
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3.
because the other 2 are things that would lead you to posting here.
Good reasoning. Unfortunately, it's the same reasoning I used to come up with a lie that would sound believable. It's true that when I was a kid I loved math, and would run around drawing diagrams to prove the pythagorean theorem on random things, and would sometimes lie awake at night torturously trying to visualize hypercubes, but I fuck*ng hated math class. Hated it like it was the antichrist, and like I was a christian.
And speaking of christianity: 3) is true. When I was fifteen my chorus flew to italy and sang for the pope for thirty seconds. There was a huge auditorium, the pope was sitting on a throne on the stage, and the performers were filling the seating area. The announcer would call out, "And now the krakow boys' choir will sing thirty seconds of, 'Glory to the almighty god, alleluia, amen,'" and then they would sing. Then the announcer would say, "And now the _____ conservatory youth chorale will sing thirty seconds of, 'Alleluia almighty god, how we do love thee,'" and then we would sing. Then the pope walked into the audience and shook people's hands. Someone even took a picture of me standing right next to the pope and totally not even noticing him, because I was busy looking at a crying lady in a fake leopard skin coat.
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Someone even took a picture of me standing right next to the pope and totally not even noticing him, because I was busy looking at a crying lady in a fake leopard skin coat.
Can'd for just cold not noticing the Pope. That's pretty badass right there. All hell of tough.
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I was worried about posting in this topic, since I'm terrible at guessing these things, but it's wandering anyway, so what the heck.
1) I own a bracelet made from the hide of a moose I crossbow-hunted.
2) I met my SO in an elaborate Internet argument involving pornographic fanfiction.
3) I visited Vatican City as a teenager; while there I bought a Pope-blessed St. Anthony medal, which I then proceeded to lose and did not find again for five years.
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Oh god, no more talk about losing toenails, it's one of my greatest fears. When I was a child I dreamed about bad people breaking in to the house and pulling at my toenails while I slept.
Felix: #1, because I want the other two to be true.
V: #2, because if I were going to make up a plausible lie based on things we vaguely know about you, it would be something like this.
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Got to be 2, since I don't think that's even possible.
Hunter from Kentucky, so that's plausible, and who wouldn't buy Smurfs in Auschwitz?
2 is in fact the lie. I have half toenails on both big toes due to ingrown toenails as a teen.
"Smurfs in Auschwitz" was a wedding gift. I'll try to remember to post a photo.
I discovered that HST had dated a cousin through a reference he made in Kingdom of Fear.
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Carlos del Vaca is a nom de plume. There is an entry in IMDB under my real name, but it's not me.
Wanna see the world's scantest legitimate IMDB? Legitimate meaning "not making things up or listing college films"?
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1809071/ (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1809071/)
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Friend of yours, LFM?
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My cousin (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1484177/)
Edit: Actually, on review, his credits are longer than I recall. Work must be picking up.
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Haha. No, that's me.
The day someone pointed out that my insignificant ass had an IMDB profile without pulling the dork move of starting my own was... a weird one.
On the one hand, there is that cosmic significance that after the end of humanity, when the aliens are pulling the internet off old computers for clues for our demise, they'll know I fetched coffee on a few movie sets and so on.
On the other hand, there's that weird realization that there is a decent possibility that a handful of credits on an internet page will be pretty much the only way I'll ever be of significance to anyone I didn't interact with personally. And that's a depressing depressing thought.
I'm veeeeeery ambivalent about having an IMDB entry. Hence the open self-deprication on the matter.
EDIT: JD, next time you talk to your cousin, tell him that some sick fuck on the internet believes that the IMDB credit "1 episode as ***** Groom" is completely fuck*ng sublime. I can imagine so many different things that role could mean.
Being on "Scrubs" I'm sure it was an interpretation that was wacky-in-sort-of-an-obvious-way but that's not his fault. Scrubs is not his fault. Fault is definitely to be assessed but not on your cousin, certainly.
But, man, "***** Groom" is the rudest credit ever.
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On the other hand, there's that weird realization that there is a decent possibility that a handful of credits on an internet page will be pretty much the only way I'll ever be of significance to anyone I didn't interact with personally.
Aw, we love you, LFM. And hey, I just stole an idea from a post of yours and put it in something I was writing. It was too good not to rip off. I am sure you will go far!
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Oh, I'm pretty sure I'll go far.
But... the idea that IF I DON'T go far, there will be people who consider my highwater mark to be that I did enough grunt work on a few movies to get a credit... it's a really unnerving thought. And like I say, I have some anxiety problems and... that kind of an unsettling idea plays right into anxiousness.
Still, thanks, W. I do appreciate it.
May I ask which idea you found useful and how you found it useful? I'm glad my ideas are useful occasionally.
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Heh. I stole the idea of a bosom needing a warning label. (http://touamb.com/index.php/topic,3453.msg83811.html#msg83811) I may also steal the idea of it making you want to knock on doors and hand out flyers. I am working on something first person from a male point of view so obviously I can't rely on introspection.
I will thank you if the thing ever gets published - ooo, and make a webpage and link to your IMDB profile... I have been rejected by several dozen agents so far but that was for something else, and I've got another one reading a manuscript right now and hey, only one has to say yes, so it might happen. Right now, I am amusing myself by making the main character work for a literary agency to test whether this snags one of them by appealing to everyone's inherent fascination with themselves.
That whole thread was a fascinating look inside of your minds, by the way.
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That whole thread was a fascinating look inside of your minds, by the way.
There are few things more interesting to me than frank discussions of the range of sexual expression and desire and, like, how the rich tapestry of what things fire different peoples engines effect those individuals as well as society as a whole.
It's not the whole picture of a person but... real insight into an individual's sexual pecadilloes can open a lot of doors on understanding who they are, I find. "Know the kink, know the person" is a vast oversimplification of my thoughts on this but it'd make a hell of a bumper sticker.
I feel similarly about one's taste in music and one's thoughts on religion/God/the spiritual dimension.
If you know a person's particular sexual bent, their taste in music, their spiritual reality and their major youthful traumas, you've got four of the really important... we'll say... lenses to examine their personality through.
But sex is often the hardest one to get an honest discussion on.
Everybody will pitch their music, most people will pitch their god and once you get to know someone pretty well, they're pretty open about whether they have any one-event signficiant childhood traumas... or as scientists call them "Batman events"...
But an HONEST discussion of sex? That's a difficult one.
(I almost typed "that's a hard one" but I knew where that would go.)
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(I almost typed "that's a hard one" but I knew where that would go.)
No, you don't, that's the whole reason for wanting the sex conversation.
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Trust me. It *is* possible to lose a toenail. I've done it many times.
Carry on.
Ahh... I hear that is very common for runners, dancers, and other athletes. oh god, omba...I'm gonna have nightmares now!
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It is that time again, time for KeithHernandez' Two Truths and a Lie, Baseball Edition (because my last one sucked):
1) One time I met Joe Carter (who is one of only two players to hit a home run to end the World Series). He was my hero at the time, and came from Milwood High School in my hometown (OKC). He also has the same first name as me and I met him in Dallas at a hotel next to the Texas Rangers stadium. My little league baseball team and I played against him and one of his teammates in a game of pool baseball. I did not get a signature, as it was not allowed at the hotel, but we did get a team picture with Joe Carter.
2) I met Sammy Sosa at a Oklahoma City 89er's game. It was one of those minor league things where some of the players sign autographs and shake hands.
3) I met Tony Gwynn when I was on a family vacation in San Diego. I ran down the street to get his autograph, for about half a mile, caught him, and then had him turn me down. I hated him for a while after that, but now I have gotten over it and he regains his place with my other sports heros (Barry Sanders, Joe Carter, Tony Gwynn and Manny Ramirez).
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I don't know which is false but...
I just wanted to add that Tony Gywnn has the whitest voice on Earth.
I have a pretty white voice but if you heard my voice and his, you'd guess I was the ethnic fellow.
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Busy work week - just getting to this thread now...
Here are three from me:
1) My first job out of high school was working as a "special analyst" for the NSA. They hired me because I scored high on a not-so-standardized test that they slipped to my high school to suss-out potential candidates.
2) I ghost-wrote a novel that appeared in the New York Times bestseller list (for two weeks).
3) I have slept with an academy award nominated actress.
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I would guess 3 (or 1), but for some reason I really believe that you wrote that novel.
I am probably wrong.
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Keith, I'm going to guess #2, simply on the basis of the discrepancy in the amount of details in #1 and #3, compared to #2.
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3) I have slept with an academy award nominated actress.
Was Minnie Driver nominated for Good Will Hunting?
I mean, okay, she's a little hossy but I just have a thing for tall ladies.
I'll say one is the fake, just because I'd want to hear the stories for two and three.
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Keith, I'm going to guess #2, simply on the basis of the discrepancy in the amount of details in #1 and #3, compared to #2.
1. I'm allergic to peanuts.
2. I've eaten duck feet.
3. I run marathons.
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Felix: #1, because I want the other two to be true.
Correct, and for exactly the right reason. I did have a Hitler mustache, and I did have a mustache for five months, but thankfully they were not one and the same. My New Year's resolution last year was to grow a mustache, which turned out to be the only reason I stuck with it for so long. You see, I'm one of those guys who has blond hair on his head but much darker facial hair. Naturally, I expected this to be the case with my upper lip as well, but instead I wound up with the tawniest of all mustaches ever to have existed. Even after I grew it to a respectable length it was indistinguishable from peachfuzz from anything more than three feet away. On a dare, I agreed to shave it into a Hitler mustache for 24 hours before getting rid of it entirely. I chickened about a quarter of the way through, which was probably for the best.
As for the national anthem bit...
My elementary school was the only one in the district that could accommodate hearing-impaired students, so that had become kind of a thing there. We got to learn ASL for language classes, and the music program featured a signing choir with as many members as the regular choir. When I was in fifth grade, said signing choir was selected from amongst similar schools in other districts to sing at Turner Field before a Braves game. A matter of great pride for the school, to be sure, but as I was not in the signing choir I would not have had any part in this myself were it not for a rather obvious complication.
As awesome as it would have been to have the entire stadium silent while twenty-odd schoolchildren did the national anthem in sign language, the Braves' front office was having none of it, so the school recruited some other students to stand next to them and actually sing the words. Somehow, after having failed an audition for the non-signing choir, I was able to make it into this group, and so it was that on one bright April afternoon an eleven-year-old kid got to stand in front of thirty thousand baseball fans and honor America.
We got to stay and watch the game for free afterwards, but I don't remember anything that happened, or even who we were playing against - I think it was Cincinnati, but I'm not sure. I only even remember how old I was at the time because on the way off the field we got to walk past the Braves' dugout and I shook hands with Kenny Lofton, who only played for the Braves in 1997. Unfortunately I didn't start to become really interested in baseball until later, so a lot of the magnitude of the event was lost on me at the time.
Also,
I just wanted to add that Tony Gywnn has the whitest voice on Earth.
I have a pretty white voice but if you heard my voice and his, you'd guess I was the ethnic fellow.
Quoted for truth. Tony Gwynn is basically the Hamburglar.
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Yeah, it was number two. What happended was, I had a lot of info, but I thought it gave it away that it was a lie. Sosa did play for the minor league team in town, and I did see him play, but I didn't get his autograph. However, if you would have seen the little autograph stands they had, you would have understood the small amount of detail. It is usually just like three guys sitting there while a lot of 8 year olds walk by silently and get some things signed. At least that is how I remember it.
Jough: yeah, I am going to switch to 1 being the lie.
Muse: I am going to have to go with 2, as I am just assuming three to be true, and think that you are tricking us on the other two, since we know how you feel about food.
Rock and Roll Pest Control:
1) I was once at a concert with less than 20 people. Wayne Coyne (of Flaming Lips fame) was one member of the crowd.
2) Once at the same venue, I saw Spoon. I stood in line 5 hours before the show started, but it was well worth it.
3) I have seen Bob Dylan, the Flaming Lips, and Deerhoof (at separate times) at a zoo.
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Busy work week - just getting to this thread now...
Here are three from me:
1) My first job out of high school was working as a "special analyst" for the NSA. They hired me because I scored high on a not-so-standardized test that they slipped to my high school to suss-out potential candidates.
2) I ghost-wrote a novel that appeared in the New York Times bestseller list (for two weeks).
3) I have slept with an academy award nominated actress.
Damn...I'd bet dollars to doughnuts that number one is TRUE. That leaves me with numbers 2 and 3. Damn...
Okay, I'll go out on a limb and guess that you didn't ghost-write a NYT bestseller, only because I bet that you wrote one! And we all know that El Guapo can charm the panties off any Academy-Award nominated actress.
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I'm gonna guess that all three of Jough's are lies.
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V: #2, because if I were going to make up a plausible lie based on things we vaguely know about you, it would be something like this.
Belatedly: while I can't fault your logic, #2 is actually true. And embarrassing. 1 was the lie -- I own that bracelet, but it was crossbow-hunted by my fifth-grade teacher, not by me.
Anyway, maybe I'll think of another round later. I'm kind of a terminally uninteresting person.
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two truths and a lie about a problem I am having!
1 I felll asleep sitting on the ground... at a free jazz concert. I do not know how.
2 I was on the verge of makeouts, but I somehow managed to fall asleep instead
3 lately I've been doing this terrifying thing where I close my eyes and -think- I'm awake and suddenly... I wake up, and can't remember what has happened in the past 15 or 20 minutes.
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I'm gonna guess that all three of Jough's are lies.
If this isn't correct, it ought to be.
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two truths and a lie about a problem I am having!
1 I felll asleep sitting on the ground... at a free jazz concert. I do not know how.
2 I was on the verge of makeouts, but I somehow managed to fall asleep instead
3 lately I've been doing this terrifying thing where I close my eyes and -think- I'm awake and suddenly... I wake up, and can't remember what has happened in the past 15 or 20 minutes.
Got to be #1. I've slept in many odd ways, but never sitting on the ground.
1 - I fell asleep in courtside seats at a Knicks game.
2 - I slept through my high school graduation ceremony.
3 - I've fallen asleep standing up in a mosh pit at a heavy metal show.
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nope! number 2 was the lie. We just watched Rushmore.
There may have been makeouts?
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*****_god, I'm going to guess that #1 is the lie. Lots of kids fall asleep during high school graduation (too much celebrating the night before), and I'm guessing that you "fell asleep" (if by asleep you mean incredibly drowsy due to fermented refreshments) at the concert too. Rocking out can take a lot out of a guy.
Keith, actually #3 was the lie. I do not run marathons.
#1: My peanut allergy developed spontaneously a few years ago. I used to eat peanut butter toast every morning for breakfast and one morning, just like any other, I took the first bite of my routine peanut butter toast, and my throat closed up. The same thing happened later in the week with a glass of soy milk. I got tested and, sure enough, I had spontaneously developed allergies to peanuts and soy. It's horrible, because I love Thai food, and now I can hardly eat any. :(
#2: I have eaten duck feet. And chicken feet too. I dated a Chinese-American pretty seriously several years ago. We would go into Chinatown with his family on weekends and we'd go to dinner. They'd do all the ordering and I just ate whatever it was. It was awesome! All really authentic and totally new tastes for me. There's not a lot of meat on a duck or chicken foot, but they soak up the flavors of whatever they're cooked in pretty nicely. In black bean and garlic sauce they were rockin'.
#3: I do not run marathons. While I would love the sense of accomplishment, and I've toyed with the idea, the idea of training for one makes me just feel tired thinking about it. I put enough strain on my body as it is. That said, I'm starting to come to the end of my performing career, and there's a running store near me where they take the fitting of shoes *very* seriously--like they analyze your gait and do all these super-precise measurements with a slide rule and stuff. It's tempting to go there and get really, really uber-fitted for a pair of excellent running shoes, and make the full investment, and take it up after I stop performing--just to maintain a certain level of rudeness to my body. However at this time, marathons are not something I really dig.
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Yep, Muse, you got it, but you're underestimating my ability to sleep standing up at metal shows. It has happened twice with no alcohol involved and I'm pretty sure it was actual sleep. Fought dosing off for a few minutes, then slept for about 90 seconds, then felt refreshed afterward. Perhaps it was more of a hypnotism from the incessant nature of metal, but it felt like sleep to me.
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Is there no new two truths and a lie?
I will fix this.
1. Toni Morrison has a low opinion of me.
2. Dave Eggers and I have had lunch.
3. I have this really embarassing habit of not reading the works of famous authors that I meet.
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Is there no new two truths and a lie?
I will fix this.
1. Toni Morrison has a low opinion of me.
2. Dave Eggers and I have had lunch.
3. I have this really embarassing habit of not reading the works of famous authors that I meet.
I'm going to say 2, because it's a little too plausible in this game, plus I like to think that 1 and 3 might be connected. (Toni Morrison all pop-quizzing you on The Bluest Eye and being so disappointed when you admit that the only one you have read was Beloved and you gave up when the punctuation stopped...)
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You are correct, ma'am.
I have worked at 826 for the greater portion of four months. Mr. Eggers likely does no know I exist. We have Shared Greetings before, however. It went like this:
"Hi Dave."
"Oh, hey... you."
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Best book title ever is "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius".
I like V's reasoning, but I'll say that 1 is the lie, and that Toni Morrison is in fact fond of Bjorn.
Two truths and a lie: Jaydub's Batman events edition
1) My younger brother drowned in a family friends' backyard pool
2) My worst enemy in grade school was killed in a bus accident
3) I was crushed under a dumptruck-load of freshly harvested wheat
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Best book title ever is "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius".
I like V's reasoning, but I'll say that 1 is the lie, and that Toni Morrison is in fact fond of Bjorn.
Two truths and a lie: Jaydub's Batman events edition
1) My younger brother drowned in a family friends' backyard pool
2) My worst enemy in grade school was killed in a bus accident
3) I was crushed under a dumptruck-load of freshly harvested wheat
Man...those are some rough life events. I'll say that #1 is false, because it is the saddest.
I would have rejoiced if my worst enemy was killed in an accident. And farming industrial accidents are commoner than you'd think. At least it wasn't silo gas.
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Yeah, I guess I didn't read the thread correctly. D'oh.
All *but* one of mine are lies. So, um, I guess you should guess which one is true...
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I am disappointed that they are not all lies, but I'll go with #1 as the true one.
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My Batman-Events lightning round - only one of these is not true:
1.) My oldest-cousin/childhood-hero was murdered by his best friend the day I graduated Jr. High.
2.) The neo-Nazi in my class was going to blow up our high school but fucked up while building one of the bombs and blew his arm off and most of his intestines out.
3.) When my dad was on the city council, he was framed for selling liquor to a minor because he voted against giving the police superfluous raises... and the charges were dropped only when he announced that he was not running for another term.
4.) Our Catholic priest was run out of town on a rail when it was discovered he was screwing teenage boys in his previous job. The next day, a body was found chopped up in a basement two houses over from the church, though the priest was most likely not involved.
5.) It took fifteen years for our high school football coach to be fired for molesting football players, even though they once did not win a game for four years. This was an open secret, however, and the reason I never played football.
6.) When I was two, I nearly drowned in a creek and to this day, I have a hard time looking at bodies of water where the water goes out past my horizon.
7.) When I was three, I bit my tongue off and it took five adults to hold me down to sew it back on. When I have a cold to this day, my tongue puffs up and I can feel the scars.
8.) My girlfriend's father was supposed to be repairing copiers in the World Trade Centre on 9/11... except that he was laid off on 9/10.
9.) Most of my mother's best friends of high school died all at once when their van was hit by a Table Talk pastry truck, backing out of the driveway into traffic.
10.) I received word of my grandfather's death while putting on my tux for the Junior Prom.
11.) Despite being in a town of 4,500 and a graduating class of 80, one of my ninth grade classmates overdosed on butane lighters and died. My friends and I would've been at that party except that our multi-family trip to Atlantic City had been pushed later by my near-death earlier in the summer from anaphalactic shock. My heart stopped and everything.
12.) I met my girlfriend on my twentieth birthday where she was jokingly introduced to me as "my birthday present" as she was newly single and went to a college where most dudes were not into ladies.
13.) One of my fifth grade teachers narrowly missed getting to be the teacher on the Challenger.
14.) I quit my job as a 911 operator when I had to put a man on hold who had found his son dead of a suicide to send out firefighters to a brush fire.
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Holy fuck*ng shit, LFM. Are you serious?
I'll never be able to eat Table Talk pie again.
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Actually, W, that is the not-true one.
...that happened to my dad, not my mom.
I come from one of those Big-Time Crazy Secrets And Lies small towns.
Two years after my parents graduated high school, someone burned the high school down and even though everyone around the age of 50 seems to know who did it, no one older or younger than that age range has ever been told.
When our local jeweler (a teenage friend of my parents) was murdered, it was just assumed that the mafia from Utica did it... until years later, it was discovered that a serial thief-killer from Western Mass had headed west once.
After being arraigned, the murderer was being transported from our city hall to some sort of legal proceeding in Albany and he "happened" to fall out of the back of the truck, off a bridge and onto the rocks of the Hudson River, to his death.
Even though he was in a full-body shackle and the truck had three locks on the outside of its back door.
I am basically from Twin Peaks.
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Man...those are some rough life events. I'll say that #1 is false, because it is the saddest.
I would have rejoiced if my worst enemy was killed in an accident. And farming industrial accidents are commoner than you'd think. At least it wasn't silo gas.
When I was about 9 (and my brother 7), my Mom took us to the house of a family with a couple kids our age. The younger ones were out in the pool while my Mom and I were inside visiting with the parents (I think I was actually watching Astro-Boy on their TV). My brother's friend Daniel came sprinting inside, yelling "Mum! Mum, Scott's drowning! He's at the bottom of the pool and isn't moving!"
The whole house emptied into the back yard, behind my Mom who was in her E.R. nurse-urgent-but-composed-but-terribly-concerned full flight while the kid's mother dialled whatever the equivalent of 911 was there. We fanned out around the pool, searching for my brother in the depths when suddenly it became apparent that Daniel thought he was being funny: all cracking up and pointing at my brother sitting a dozen yards away in the sandbox looking puzzled.
We left early that day. I'm sure Daniel still bears signs of his mother's wrath.
I was actually a little traumatized by the death of my enemy. I had something of a survivor complex over it - wishing the kid dead, then coming to school one day and finding out he is. I don't think I've hated anyone that deeply since. You bind up all sorts of your own identity in a really negative way when you deeply hate someone.
I was kind of reborn by the wheat-bin incident. A (different) family friend had a huge station at the edge of the Outback in Moree, NSW. I spent a summer with him and his wife when I was 11. I owe my life to him, since it was my own stupidity that put me under the wheat. I have no idea how he found me, nor where he got the strength to haul me out from under it by a single hand around my ankle. I spent 2 weeks in the hospital, as it turns out ingesting raw wheat is quite dangerous. The tiny hairs on the grains can enable them to bore into your tissue.
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Actually, W, that is the not-true one.
...that happened to my dad, not my mom.
Still ruins the pie, though.
At least tell us what state this amazing town is in?
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I'm not sure this game can possibly continue now that LFM's made that post. I've been trying to think of themes about which I might conceivably be able to think of two interesting personal facts and one interesting lie, but... holy God, LFM. Holy mother of God.
I got nothin'.
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Well, he mentioned Utica, so I'm thinking upstate New York. Plus, I think that's where Little Falls is. My sister-in-law (married to the brother from my earlier entry) is from Watkin's Glen, so I've gained some familiarity with the region.
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Well, he mentioned Utica, so I'm thinking upstate New York. Plus, I think that's where Little Falls is.
Oy, it must be time for bed. All those references to NY State made no impression on me as a source of information. Please excuse me now while I shut down my brain for routine maintenance.
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Aw, man, I did not mean to kill this awesome thread.
I just... have a lot of Batman Events in my life and they're all kinda so unbelievable in retrospect that I thought throwing all the ones I could think of in ten minutes down and seeing which would ring false.
Please, do not stop an awesome thread just because I am from Bizarro Lake Woebegon, where the women are weak, the men are ugly and the children... are below-average.
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Please excuse me now while I shut down my brain for routine maintenance.
Hee! Best euphemism for the sleep act ever. I'm going to have to use that.
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I am a fan of the "Protection and Preservation" theory of sleep, myself.
"I'm gonna go to bed... don't want to get into any more trouble tonight."
[/freshmanpsychmajor]
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1. I've written a novel.
2. I've never seen my best friend in person.
3. I have an inexplicable blood disorder.
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MOF: I'm going for number 2 for the lie.
I have my reasons.
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MOF: I'm going for number 2 for the lie.
I have my reasons.
And what are they? Inquiring minds want to know.
;)
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Three, because... if you at least know that it's a blood disorder, it's at least partially explicable. You would know that it is in your blood, you'd know more-or-less its effects on you, etc. It'd just be... unnamed, not... inexplicable.
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Heh. Well, you're both incorrect. The lie is #1.
#1: I've never written a novel. I've played midwife to the birth of a novel, but I've never written one myself. I have written buttloads of short stories, poetry, essays, non-fiction, and the like; but never a novel. I am a good editor, a stellar muse for authors (most days), and I can string a few sentences together; but a novel is way too much work for me. I'm flattered that you would think that true of me, however.
#2: I met my best friend on the internet almost 4 years ago. We talk daily via chat and email and phone. But we've yet to meet in person; time, distance, and money being the annoying hindrances they are.
#3: I have a blood composition that confounds the medical community. I've seen specialist after specialist and no one has any idea what's up. Personally, I feel fine. The medical community is confused as hell though. I keep telling them it's my superpowers manifesting, but so far they don't believe me, no matter how many Volkswagens I bench in the clinic parking lot.
So there you have it. :)
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Damnit. My reasons were that you are a relatively literate geek on the internet in your late 20s/early 30s, that increases your liklihood of writing a novel, an inexplicable blood disorder was too outrageous and specific to have made up but an internet best friend you've never seen is common enough to be plausible thus making it the most unlikely.
Except for the bit where it's actually true.
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So is Jough never going to come back and tell us the answer to his?
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#2: I met my best friend on the internet almost 4 years ago.
#3: I have a blood composition that confounds the medical community.
Both of these are interesting statements that require more explanation, for my imagination's sake.
What ABOUT your blood is so confounding? Ratio of red things to white things to scab things? I know so little about blood that I wouldn't know what could be confounding about it. Do the doctors say that you are supposed to be ill from this difference? What side effects do they say you should be having? Do you have any that actually exist?
Moreover, how were you able to bond with this person so well over internet and phone that you term him or her your full-on best friend? I definitely have friends of mine that I know only or mostly through the internet, this is just a reality of the day but...
It seems like there would have to be a story behind how you and this person could bond that fully internetally. And like I say, I have nothing against friendship electronically, some of my closest friends in Los Angeles, I knew first online and now hang out with significantly in physical settings.
But best friend is a pretty strong label that... in my experience, I couldn't apply to any of the people I've never met in person.
Is it that there is a latent beyond-platonic attraction underlying your friendship with him (or, far less likely but exponentially hotter, her) complicating the matter or... something? Is this friend living in Cuba or Iran or some other place that is nearly-impossible for a not-completely-rich person to get to?
There are definitely interesting stories in both of these answers. If they are too personal, don't worry about it but... man, there must be good stories there.
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My ex (the Crap Dude) had hemolytic anemia spherocytosis, which meant that his body made deformed RBCs and so his spleen kept socking them away as "irregular stock". When he was 4 years old, his spleen was like 2 feet long because it was packed full of irregular RBCs, and his grossly enlarged spleen was crushing his other internal organs. So he had a splenectomy, and his immune system was never quite up to par since then.
That's not a really rare blood disorder, though. The docs recognized it after running a battery of tests.
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God was retroactively punishing him for being a crap dude to you.
Karma is fourth-dimensional.
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My white blood cell count is extremely low. To the point where, when other doctors (who don't know me) look at my chart, they ask my hematologist how long I have to live. I show no other symptoms of anything that could be tied to a low WBC count. In fact, aside from that blip on the medical record, I'm extremely healthy. My low WBC count should mean that I'm getting infections and the like all the time, but I've missed maybe 10 days of work due to illness in about as many years. I never get sick.
They have been tracking my WBC count monthly for over a year now; and tri-monthly for about a year prior to that. The first instance of low WBC they found was about 5 years ago, although at that time it wasn't freakishly low. It fluctuates, but never seems to go above a certain threshold. I'm now on a six month cycle for checking the count. They have done every test known to medical science on my blood. All of my blood cells and blood components are normal in their morphology and "behavoir" (or whatever), except that my body doesn't make a lot of white ones. Specifically, my neutrophil count is the low one. The doctor explained what it meant to me but I forgot. I dunno. I feel fine.
The doctor kept telling me to call him immediately if I ever got a cold or anything, so I could come in and get a count taken, to see how (or if) my immune system responds to infection, but I haven't been sick in the last 2-3 years. So that's just one they'll never figure out, I guess.
Finally I opted for a bone marrow biopsy (it's not a fun procedure, and it feels gross, but I did get to see a chunk of my own bone without experiencing trauma, so that was kinda cool). My hematologist was thinking that maybe my bone marrow is producing enough white blood cells, but that they were dying off before entering my bloodstream, something called "maturational arrest."
Turns out, my bone marrow is functioning perfectly normally.
So the inexplicability of it is that I should not be as well as I am, and have the blood counts that I do. According to the numbers, I should be down with every possible infection out there, but I'm not.
For the record, when I went in for my bone marrow biopsy, I listened to my iPod as a distraction. The song? Freezepop's "Here Comes A Special Boy" on repeat. :)
As to the other question...
I have another best friend whom I have met in person. I've known her for over ten years and she lives in my city and I'm godmother to her daughter, etc. So I do have a "normal" best friendship as well. My "internet best friend," well, I can't really say how or why that happened the way it did. It just did. We're close. We connect. Like any friendship, we orbit one another and sometimes that orbit is on an "inswing" and other times it's on an "outswing," but the longest we've gone without talking to one another has been, I think two weeks. So there has been a lot of ground covered via conversation in the past 4 years when you consider that it's been a 2-6 hour long conversation almost daily for 4 years. Even on a conservative estimate (typing in chat takes longer and so therefore a 4-hour chat is about the same as maybe a 1-hour phone conversation, we haven't talked every single day--although it's been close, etc), we've still put a lot of time and effort into this friendship.
This is the person I think to talk to when I need a reality check, when the merde hits the fan; the person I worry about when I know something big is coming up; I guess we have chosen to make one another a priority and that's where the friendship has gained so much strength.
The reason we haven't visited in person truly has everything to do with life circumstance and none of the other dramatic ideas you've proposed (although I agree, those would make for a better story). I am unbelievably broke right now, basically living check to check, so a plane ticket is not an option for me. My best friend is at a place in life where travel is not practical. Although we very badly want to plan a visit, and have been talking about it for a few years now, there is also a sense that things are fine as they are, so there's no need to rush a visit necessarily. A visit doesn't seem, to us, to have the potential to change much, aside from our own sense of curiosity about being in one another's physical presence. These things are important, surely--a virtual hug can never ever be the same as a real one, no matter the feeling between friends--but we both know the visit will happen eventually, and in the meantime we'll keep working on and enjoying what we have.
Sorry it's not more dramatic than that. *shrug* Just two people who really click, I guess.
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So, essentially, you are a ballerina linguist with almost no white blood cells.
You should have cards printed up that says that.
That's really interesting! I'm glad you don't suffer any ill effects from that disorder but... yeah... from what little I know about medicine, I don't know how you're perfectly healthy like that, either. But I'm glad that you are.
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So, essentially, you are a ballerina linguist with almost no white blood cells.
Heh. Among other things.
That's really interesting! I'm glad you don't suffer any ill effects from that disorder but... yeah... from what little I know about medicine, I don't know how you're perfectly healthy like that, either. But I'm glad that you are.
Thank you. :) C'est gentil.
And now...I'm waiting for another couple rounds of lies and truths. *looks around, hoping people will post*
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neutrophil
Neutrophils are like the infantry of the immune system, they respond quickly in large numbers to sites of inflammation and mainly phagocytize bacteria or any small foreign objects they can handle; but there are other white blood cells that share the same functions. Perhaps you have other cells compensating for the neutropenia (lack of neutrophils). You could be the latest step in animal evolution.
Be on the look out for any extraordinary powers you may seem to possess.
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Are you sure you're not a mutant? Check yourself for incredible psychic powers; I hear that's the first indicator.
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Well, I dunno. I can shoot laser beams out of my eyes. Does that count?
;)
C'mon with the lies and truths, people! *does a little cheerleading move*
*feels dumb*
*slinks away*
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Well, if nobody else is going to do one I can do another one...
1. The house where I lived as a baby appears in a Monty Python sketch.
2. I have been in Trouble for booty dancing in Tiananmen Square.
3. I have seen Vladimir Kramnik play a simultaneous chess match at a bar and got him to autograph my beer mat.
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1) I was once at a concert with less than 20 people. Wayne Coyne (of Flaming Lips fame) was one member of the crowd.
2) Once at the same venue, I saw Spoon. I stood in line 5 hours before the show started to be first in line.
3) I have seen Bob Dylan, the Flaming Lips, and Deerhoof (at separate times) at a zoo.
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Ah, yes - I suppose with Jough's that makes three outstanding lists for people to answer now.
KeithHernandez: I'm going to guess #2. #1 cannot be the lie without #2 also being a lie, since the Spoon concert could not be at the same venue as a concert that never actually happened. It also seems highly suspect that you would wait in line for five hours at a place that also hosts concerts with fewer than 20 people. #3 is too specific (and awesome) to have been made up. Of course, I'm probably being overly technical, or perhaps you deliberately phrased them that way just to mislead people.
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Yes, you are right. I am really bad at this game, and also that wasn't even a good lie.
I did wait in line to see a Spoon show for about 5 hours, but only because tickets were sold out but they were letting 50 more people in. Anyways, this is a tiny venue in Norman, OK, that I saw Johnathan Richman at (he is the guy from the Modern Lovers and Something about Mary(i basically saw that two person band in the movie)). However, I was like fifth in line. Also, this place is essentially the same size as a big garage(maybe 4 car personal garage), and there were about 250 people in there. It was Oklahoma in the summer, and the building is basically a garage for real, so there is little air flow, and a really, really bad Dallas based band by the name Deathray Davies came out, and had an absolutely horrible show. One of the girls I was with started freaking out and I basically had to go sit outside and smoke cigarettes while she was pissed/hot/bored. I got to go in towards the end, but it was a huge waste of time. I have never really liked Spoon since, and it had absolutely nothing to do with them, but whatever.
Also, when I saw the Flaming Lips at the Zoo they did not play Christmas at the Zoo or This Here Giraffe. Also, I was rolling, and it was when Wayne first introduced his UFO prop, which was amazingly cool, but he talked at least 6 minutes between each song. It was a major buzzkill and they only played like 13ish songs in about 2 hours. The second best show I ever saw was them though, so I guess it is alright. They wasted my money though.
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Dang, MOF, a bone biopsy didn't hurt?
Where did they perform the biopsy? Like, what part of your body? And it didn't hurt?? What did it feel like? I'm intrigued.
For example, one of the things I can do as an EMT-II is an IO, or intraosseous infusion line. If we have an infant that we cannot get an IV line started and the situation is critical, I can start an IO line in the tibia (shin bone, below the knee, on the medial flat portion of the tib). I've been told that it a) hurts like crazy and b) doesn't hurt that much. Which is it, party people? Painful or not that bad?
Anyway, IOs are done as a last resort because of the risk of infection. We also have to be careful and aim AWAY from the bone's growth plate in children. Theoretically we can do IOs on adults too, but usually those are done on the STERNUM. Yes, a tiny bone that's right above your heart, but it DOES have a marrow space that's significant enough to start an IO line within, and our flight paramedics have special equipment to do sternal IOs. Crazy, huh?
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They did it in my right posterior iliac crest. The bone is super close to the skin there so I imagine that's why they do it. Same for the tibia and sternum, I'd wager. They took a hard bone sample and a marrow sample. It hurt, but it wasn't the Big Production of Flaming Death and Doom(TM) that everyone said it was. And it was over in seconds.
They numbed the site with a local, first, of course. This was actually the most fun part because when the doctor was loading the syringe, something wasn't right (I couldn't tell because it was all happening behind me). I was lying there, with the iPod playing Freezepop's "Here Comes A Special Boy" on repeat, and just going to my happy place and thinking about Philippe and his Walk-Around-Butt and everything, when suddenly there was this loud champagne pop and a cold spray all over my back. I jumped, and the doctor just said, "Oh sh--." We both started cracking up. I guess the syringe was pressurized funny or something, because the needle had 'sploded right off the syringe. I thought it was hilarious, and couldn't stop giggling after that.
Once the local had taken effect, they went in with a biopsy needle and extracted a core of bone. I could feel some pressure and grinding which was gross, and a little pain, but kind of like what you feel when you put pressure on a bruise--nothing more. It was more a grody feeling of, "Someone's monkeying around with stuff inside my body. This shouldn't be possible." Once they'd gotten the hard sample, they inserted a finer needle and sucked out the marrow like through a straw. That was the grossest most unpleasant feeling ever. There was pain, but it wasn't like I expected. I guess bone marrow is kept at a constant pressure, so when you suck it out of one place it creates this vacuum in another place and the marrow has to flow into the old place to maintain constant pressure. So I felt this suction all the way through my ilium and down my femur for about three seconds. Imagine the feeling you get when your ears plug up on a plane, but in your leg bone. That's what it felt like. Painful, but nothing agonizing. In fact, I went to ballet class that same night.
It took a looooooong time to heal; the bone was very sore and tender for several weeks, and I couldn't do an arabesque above 90 degrees on that side for about two months.
It was cool to see a chunk of my own bone in the little test tube though. I opted not to look at the marrow, however.
And now... on topic:
Felix, I'm going to say #3 is the lie.
1. I used to live in a crackhouse.
2. I have never smoked pot.
3. I have dual citizenship: French and American.
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MOF: Number 3? Maybe?
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damn, way to make me scared about how I just signed up as a potential Marrow donor.
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Awww, inev, not to worry. It felt gross and creepy, but only for about 3 seconds. Although there was some pain, it didn't exactly "hurt" per se. That said, I don't ever want to have to do it again. And also, if I understand correctly, they put you under a general for a full-on transplant.
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apparently now they can also do this dialysis type thing where they take the loose marrow cells out of your blood?
that sounds like bullshit to me, though.
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Fuck yes! Best bone biopsy story ever. It was like I was THERE, MOF! The champagne cork and the doctor's incongruous "oh shit!" comment were the best.
And...damn. The marrow pressure sounds craaazy! Jesus. I can't imagine that sensation. Hella crazy.
I'm glad that I haven't had to have one of those done. I have enough of a problem with the annual exam that they force us ladies to go through every year. Even worse is getting it done in a small town clinic with a PA and a nurse peering in with a flashlight, all like Nancy Drew up in there working against gravity. There is a GREAT monologue in the pu$$y Monologues (of which I was a part here in my li'l town) titled "My Angry pu$$y" that discusses those exams and how much they fuck*ng SUCK.
I would like to quote:
"My pu$$y's angry about those exams! It gets defensive WEEKS in advance and won't leave the house!" (I also quoted the part about Nancy Drew working against gravity from the monologue). The lady who read that monologue has a fantastic Scottish accent and I about died laughing. She was great.
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three truths and a lie, College Edition!
-I just (most likely) failed a Latin midterm which is almost half of my grade. I hardly care. Hard to say why.
-for a few weeks I've really really wanted to transfer to the School of Architecture and become an Architect.
-I am doing horribly in Psych 101. I am planning to major in Psych.
-today in psychology, we had a big discussion about how "aptitude" tests shouldn't be used to decide who to let into college, because they only measure "raw" intelligence-- not drive or focus.
PS as long as I'm freaking out, I am also doing real shittily in Arabic. I hate midterms.
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Stay the hell out of the A School, tI. Architecture suuuuuuuuuucks as a major. At my school it was the 2nd most time-intensive major offered (drama being first because of all the rehersals and whatnot outside of class time). In their 4th year kids would frequenly bring sleeping bags to their desks.
First year we had two required classes. One was Architecture where we would have assigments like "draw a leaf using only 3 points and 3 lines" or "make a representation of Versaille using cardstock, acetate, tape, and glue." The other was Architectural History which was more like, "for the final we'll show you 200 slides for 3 seconds each. You must identify the building, the architect (if applicable), and its cultural/historical signifigance."
I was all, "listen you bastards, pick a half of my brain to work on and stick to it. I can't go left to right all willy-nilly like this."
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Depending on the right person, architecture school can be a good thing. For me, it ground my imagination into dust and I haven't had the courage to pick up a pencil and draw anything since probably 2002. I had dreams of going to art school, but I chose architecture because I figured I needed to make a living.
We frequently spent all-nighters at the studio. 90- and 100-hour workweeks were commonplace. I remember being at my desk at 4:30AM when a girl cut the shit out of her hand with an X-acto blade while she was trying to build a model. She had spent over 50 hours on her model thus far and she was terrified that she was going to bleed on her model and get an F on it. Her boyfriend walked her over to Waldenberg (the campus medical center).
There was a ton of competition. Supplies are ridiculously expensive (I spent at least $1200 a year on supplies for my studio classes for three years plus 1 year of grad school). I had my $60 desk covering (vinyl Borco) slashed by another student so I couldn't draw on it anymore. My Mayline ($120 parallel ruler) was also trashed. I was one of THREE women in my first-year studio class. Our instructor was a sexist asshole who didn't believe that women belonged in architecture. the other two girls made sure to wear skirts for their juries and giggled a lot and acted very submissive. I was pissed off and refused to roll over for these aged architects with nasty "soul patches" and bad suits. I was given a B- so that my class credit couldn't transfer to grad school.
After being hopped up on caffeine and not sleeping for 32 hours, it was not uncommon for kids (boys and girls alike) to cry during a particularly hard beating administered by a ruthless jury. Someone posted a sign similar to this in our studio, a la the Mastercard commercials:
Borco: $62.00
Mayline: $120.00
20 sheets of Strathmore paper: $59.98
Drawing lead: $8.99
Electric drafting eraser: $89.99
No-Doz: $2.99
Crying in front of your jury: PRICELESS
There are some things money can't buy. For everything else, there's studio.
Stay the hell out of the A School, tI. Architecture suuuuuuuuuucks as a major. At my school it was the 2nd most time-intensive major offered (drama being first because of all the rehersals and whatnot outside of class time). In their 4th year kids would frequenly bring sleeping bags to their desks.
First year we had two required classes. One was Architecture where we would have assigments like "draw a leaf using only 3 points and 3 lines" or "make a representation of Versaille using cardstock, acetate, tape, and glue." The other was Architectural History which was more like, "for the final we'll show you 200 slides for 3 seconds each. You must identify the building, the architect (if applicable), and its cultural/historical signifigance."
I was all, "listen you bastards, pick a half of my brain to work on and stick to it. I can't go left to right all willy-nilly like this."
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Felix, I'm going to say #3 is the lie.
1. I used to live in a crackhouse.
2. I have never smoked pot.
3. I have dual citizenship: French and American.
I have to go with #2, because I really want the other two to be true, and because really, c'mon. You ain't runnin' for office here.
1. Cameron Diaz and I were born in the same hospital, mere hours apart.
2. My baby-sitter in small times was Mrs. America.
3. I'm an ESL person. My native tongue is Japanese.
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three truths and a lie, College Edition!
-I just (most likely) failed a Latin midterm which is almost half of my grade. I hardly care. Hard to say why.
-for a few weeks I've really really wanted to transfer to the School of Architecture and become an Architect.
-I am doing horribly in Psych 101. I am planning to major in Psych.
-today in psychology, we had a big discussion about how "aptitude" tests shouldn't be used to decide who to let into college, because they only measure "raw" intelligence-- not drive or focus.
PS as long as I'm freaking out, I am also doing real shittily in Arabic. I hate midterms.
Aw, midterms are jerks. I will beat them up for you.
This is a tough one... I'll say 3 is the lie because you seem to have stronger opinions about the other three (bitter apathy being a strong opinion in the first case.) Also the first two fit with things you've said recently (i.e. mentions of upcoming midterms and recent interest in architecture), and the fourth one doesn't seem like something you'd make up. Unless you're making it up to make a point, like if you actually agree that aptitude tests suck because they only measure raw intelligence, and you wish your psych class would have this discussion, but they didn't. Of all the reasons to hate on the SAT's, though, "they only measure raw intelligence" isn't one that makes sense to me, therefore I'm going to assume it doesn't make sense to you, either.
*TRANSITION*
Okay, I tried to come up with a themed one, and it totally didn't work at all.
1) I once accidentally fell asleep at school -- for thirteen hours.
2) I'm trying to learn to ride one of those old-timey big wheel in front bicycles, even though I don't know how to ride a regular bike.
3) I have a disorder, kind of like Tourette's syndrome, that makes me involuntarily snap my fingers and say numbers at inappropriate times.
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yeah, the kid was arguing that the problem with standardized tests is that they only measure potential-- ie, they don't catch lazy people like me and keep them the fuck out. So yeah, I am ambivalent.
And yeah, the psych one was the lie. I actually am doing really well in that class. Because psych is really cool. and... easy.
also: the architecture thing. I don't know. It's just... I am realizing lately that my opportunities to try new things are running out, school-wise. And I'm always terrified I'll discover some new passion too late in life to make a go of it. I know that you'll say "it's never too late!" but it obviously gets harder with time. And I have been thinking lately about the fact that I have wanted to be an architect since I was a little kid and I learned that they were the people who made cool buildings. I only gave this up when I decided that I sucked at math too much.
But now I'm scared of it.
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yeah, the kid was arguing that the problem with standardized tests is that they only measure potential-- ie, they don't catch lazy people like me and keep them the fuck out. So yeah, I am ambivalent.
And yeah, the psych one was the lie. I actually am doing really well in that class. Because psych is really cool. and... easy.
also: the architecture thing. I don't know. It's just... I am realizing lately that my opportunities to try new things are running out, school-wise. And I'm always terrified I'll discover some new passion too late in life to make a go of it. I know that you'll say "it's never too late!" but it obviously gets harder with time. And I have been thinking lately about the fact that I have wanted to be an architect since I was a little kid and I learned that they were the people who made cool buildings. I only gave this up when I decided that I sucked at math too much.
But now I'm scared of it.
Shit...I'm sorry, I did not mean to make you scared of it.
Take a studio class or an introductory class. Maybe you will be one of those kids who thrives and will grow up to become a famous architect. GO FOR IT!
You will never know unless you try.
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Borco: $62.00
Mayline: $120.00
20 sheets of Strathmore paper: $59.98
Drawing lead: $8.99
Electric drafting eraser: $89.99
No-Doz: $2.99
Crying in front of your jury: PRICELESS
There are some things money can't buy. For everything else, there's studio.
I could never even get my Mayline on straight. I think it was defective. I did however learn that in terms of usefulness duct tape doesn't hold a candle to draft dots. Those things are one of humanity's great inventions.
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yeah, I mean, I was thinking I'd take some kind of intro class maybe, next year. Who knows. It probably will be a bad idea, but... I mean, college is a time to make silly choices!
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Doc wins. #3 was my lie. I have citizenship in only one country: the US (please don't hate me, I am not my government). I have never tried pot (or any other controlled substance, besides alcohol, for that matter), and I used to live in a crackhouse.
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I have never tried pot (or any other controlled substance, besides alcohol, for that matter), and I used to live in a crackhouse.
These two facts seem to clash with each other. Explain further?
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Well, the reasons I've never tried drugs are pretty tame. Growing up training for a serious career in dance, I couldn't afford to put *anything* into my body that would affect it negatively. And I really didn't want to, out of fear of how it might affect my training. Plus I'm a huge control freak, so the idea of taking something that could make me lose control/personal mental presence was just not something I was into.
At the crossroads between professional dance and college, when fate blocked off the professional dance route with a disastrous mudslide, I chose college. While there, I was extremely poor; paying my own way through school and up to my eyeballs in loans and still working 30 hours or more per week while a full-time student. I rented a 9 x 13 room that shared a kitchen and bath (both also of similar dimensions) with another 9 x 13 room renter. To call it an "apartment" is being very generous. It was in a high-rise off campus, kind of bordering on a shady part of town. The entire building was filthy and in poor repair. The only reason we didn't have roaches, I think, was because we were on the 9th floor. There were few residents in this building, and those who were there (aside from me and my roommate) were, shall we say, "entrepreneurs." Chemists, you could say; or perhaps simply distributors. Their product was very specialized, if you know what I mean. It got totally raided shortly after I moved out.
In the meantime, during my college career, I was doing what anyone in college does: partying. There was pot all around all the time, and since at this time I was embittered on dance (due to the aforementioned mudslide), I had no reason to "Say No." However every time it was offered to me I was just kind of, "Meh," and so never tried it. I guess it just didn't seem all that alluring to me, I dunno. I have nothing against it, I just don't really have any great urge to try it, I guess. And any drugs besides pot are too scary for me, given my control freak tendencies.
So there you have it, Mets.
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whenever the fact that I haven't smoked pot comes up, my friends all get awkward. And then my friend Sarah says "but-- he's just waiting for the right time. Right Dan? *elbow elbow, smile*"
I am not sure what this means.
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whenever the fact that I haven't smoked pot comes up, my friends all get awkward. And then my friend Sarah says "but-- he's just waiting for the right time. Right Dan? *elbow elbow, smile*"
I am not sure what this means.
I have had to have at least $6,000 worth of dental work due to smoking weed. Let me clarify.
When I was 16, I was at a friend's house after school (no parents, obviously) and we decided to rock the ganj. It must have been laced with something, or else I just became hypoxic and passed out on this guy's kitchen floor. None of my awesome friends broke my fall. Most of my front tooth and the tooth next to it (numbers 7 and 8) were gone.
Nothing sobers you up quicker than having to call your mom to say that you "fell" and broke out some of your teeth. My family has great teeth. I never had to have orthodontics, my teeth were naturally straight and gorgeous. Good thing I had to do illegal drugs and then have some of them be knocked out by a rogue kitchen floor.
I had to have a root canal on the front tooth and then the dentist made built-up teeth with composite or acrylic to cover them. They were pretty decent. When I was 27 I decided to get permanent crowns installed on them. It costs a lot, not to mention having to take time off work and the pain and suffering. I would happily trade all my marijuana related experiences for my natural teeth to be whole and unbroken.
Not really worth it, in my opinion.
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Hey, I've got a tooth I refer to as "cool :)" too - can we be friends?
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I've never tried weed, in fact I don't think I can even recall seeing people smoke weed (maybe once or twice). At most parties I've been at where weed was being smoked it was normally a couple of folks in a back room somewhere and it was just never my scene. I'd probably smoke some if offered I've just never bothered to seek some out.
This makes me feel a little uneasy about my uni-student identity. See the other thread re: me not going to the right parties.
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Aw, smoking weed is no big deal.
No college student should go through without trying mushrooms at least once though.
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Hey, I've got a tooth I refer to as "cool :)" too - can we be friends?
Damn emoticons! It's numbers 7 & 8, I just accidentally put ) too close to the 8.
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Aw, smoking weed is no big deal.
No college student should go through without trying mushrooms at least once though.
Interestingly, though for a period encompassing the last two years of college and maybe two years after, you could pretty much have called me a stoner, I never tried anything beyond weed and its big brother variant, hash.
Never felt the need to, I was sorta of the opinion "man, this is so awesome that I don't need anything more, other things might hurt me, other things might addict me, other things are certainly more expensive and this is already awesome enough."
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I debated making one of my truths/lies be about drugs. I sure have done a lot of them, and I guess all I can say about it now is I wish I had that money. 10 years of sitting on a couch and smoking and snorting and etc. gets into real geetis.
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Here's another set from meeeee:
1. I speak American Sign Language fluently.
2. I trained at a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu academy for several months.
3. I have a brand-new Burton giraffe snowboard with Salomon Poison bindings leaning up against my wall that I still haven't had a chance to take outside yet.
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...gets into real geetis.
I don't know what this means.
Linnea, I'm going to say #1 is your lie; although I'd bet you probably need to know ASL for your work (you are an EMT-type, right? I'm still too new... maybe mixing up my forum-acquaintance traits in my head). So this kinda makes me lean towards #2, but I'm going to stick with #1. #3 is way too specific compared to the others; for some reason this makes me think it's true although now that I think about it, I'm sure I should be thinking it's the lie for the same reason.
Anyhow, I'm sticking to my first instinct and saying it's #1.
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Here's another set from meeeee:
1. I speak American Sign Language fluently.
2. I trained at a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu academy for several months.
3. I have a brand-new Burton giraffe snowboard with Salomon Poison bindings leaning up against my wall that I still haven't had a chance to take outside yet.
I'm going to say #3, and I'm going to say that it was a cunning trick you tried to play on all of us, because you have a new Burton board but you've been shredding on it all season.
Now go and try my set.
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Oh, no one has done Nabu's.
1. Cameron Diaz and I were born in the same hospital, mere hours apart.
2. My baby-sitter in small times was Mrs. America.
3. I'm an ESL person. My native tongue is Japanese.
I did some Actual Research (which is to say used the search function of the messageboard). 1 might be true as you once mentioned you share a birthday. 2, I could do nothing with, except the oddness of the term 'Mrs' America seems like evidence of truth. As for 3 - I can't imagine this would have never come up, and it never has as far as I can tell, but there is a place where you make an offhand reference to 'moving to America' that makes me hesitate.
So, I dunno. Maybe just because you share a birthday doesn't mean you shared a hospital so maybe that's a lie after all. Maybe you spoke Japanese till you were two years old and you don't remember any of it so that's why you never chime in on the discussions of Japanese. I think I choose 2, but mostly just to get it over with.
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1-- my family name is Burton, but I am not related to the snowboard company. Or the director. I often (jokingly) claim to be, though.
2-- one of my best friends here is actually Tom Cruise's niece. She does not like for people to know this, although she has a kind of weird pride about it.
3-- my best friend in middle school was the son of one of the co-founders of ESPN. I didn't know this for years.
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1-- my family name is Burton, but I am not related to the snowboard company. Or the director. I often (jokingly) claim to be, though.
2-- one of my best friends here is actually Tom Cruise's niece. She does not like for people to know this, although she has a kind of weird pride about it.
3-- my best friend in middle school was the son of one of the co-founders of ESPN. I didn't know this for years.
I want to say 2, but Jesus I wouldn't want people to know I was related to him either. Ok, it's 1. You actually are Tim Burton.
My lie is #1 - she is actually 4 years younger than I am (and I had no idea that this board maintained such antipathy towards her). The second Mrs. America was my babysitter. She was lovely, and we had a wonderful time. Her husband later was Lt. Gov. of Alaska. I did speak Japanese as my first language, but my family moved back to Alaska when I was three or so.
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If someone was related to Tom Cruise and everyone knew about it, that's pretty much an invitation to having everything you owned covered in grafitti that says "Xenu rules!" and "My uncle wants to pray the gay away!" and so on.
The world wants vengence on Tom Cruise but he lives on a zepplin battleship and travels by armed rickshaw... so most of us would have to settle for revenging ourselves upon his more accessable relations.
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I don't know what this means.
Linnea, I'm going to say #1 is your lie; although I'd bet you probably need to know ASL for your work (you are an EMT-type, right? I'm still too new... maybe mixing up my forum-acquaintance traits in my head). So this kinda makes me lean towards #2, but I'm going to stick with #1. #3 is way too specific compared to the others; for some reason this makes me think it's true although now that I think about it, I'm sure I should be thinking it's the lie for the same reason.
Anyhow, I'm sticking to my first instinct and saying it's #1.
I'm going to say #3, and I'm going to say that it was a cunning trick you tried to play on all of us, because you have a new Burton board but you've been shredding on it all season.
Now go and try my set.
MOF is right, it's #1 that is the lie. I am an EMT-II, but I've never had a Deaf patient who speaks sign language...yet.
I studied ASL for a solid year in college and was fluent at the time. However, after college I wasn't able to practice, and so most of my vocabulary has faded away. there is only one Deaf person on the island that I know of, but she was raised in an era where ASL was for "stupid people", so she only reads lips and doesn't know a single word of sign language. It's such a gorgeous, poetic language. I remember seeing in some of our Deaf Culture videotapes that a lot of Deaf kids get pissed when people just stare at them while they're talking....but it's so mesmerizing! Most hearing folks have not seen people speaking in sign language, so they tend to stare because it's fascinating. It's highly rude in Deaf culture to do so, because it's blatant eavesdropping. Also, over the past several decades there's been a huge movement to recognize Deaf culture, which is why it's spelled with a capital D.
#2 is true, the Crap Dude to whom I was once engaged was really into martial arts, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and Jeet Kun Do being his specialties, so I trained at a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu academy for several months.
#3 is also true, I have a gorgeous board that I haven't been able to take out. My friends that I used to go boarding with have all since moved off island, and I don't know anyone that I can go with. Going into the backcountry solo to snowboard is a baaaaad idea, so I havent' done it. I should probably break out of my shell and go meet new people and make an effort...but meh, I'll just sit around and look at it some more.
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You know, if I had thought about where you are, I would have gotten that. Ding-dang.
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The world wants vengence on Tom Cruise but he lives on a zepplin battleship and travels by armed rickshaw... so most of us would have to settle for revenging ourselves upon his more accessable relations.
I think just being Tom Cruise is punishment enough. Just be glad it's him, not you. (http://www.jonathancoulton.com/mp3/Tom%20Cruise%20Crazy.mp3)
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I hate Tom Cruise, just hate him all to hell. Why doesn't he pick on diabetics for needing insulin? Why do Scientologists frown on psychiatry, and why do they think that people gotta pray the gay away? He's such a crap dude.
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You should probably never come to Los Angeles, then, Lin.
On a nice weekend afternoon, you basically cannot throw a bottle of Zoloft in any direction without hitting some motherfucker at a folding table on a street corner, offering a "free personality test" that is gonna end with a dude telling you some crazy shit about the souls of alien ghosts being trapped in a volcano that was nuked, a million years ago.
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the only Scientologist "church" in the US outside of LA is down the street from my school.
Also: #2 was the lie.
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Really? That's a strange-ass fact... especially when you consider that there are, like, eighty of them in Los Angeles. They are such as the Starbucks of pyramid-scheme fake-religions out here... basically, every third block.
Where is this one other church? I'm trying to think of places in America where "rich" and "crazy" are both in high-enough concentrations for such an affair. Manhattan? Berkeley?
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St. Louis, MO.
Actually, it's technically in University City Missouri. I believe.
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Actually, it's technically in University City Missouri. I believe.
A college area, I presume by the name?
A college area definitely fulfills the vendt-diagram requirement for "crazy" and "rich" to which I earlier spoke.
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I mean, I guess. WashU is in University City. Which is really part of St Louis proper. I feel like the kind of kids that are at WashU, though, are more likely to find Scientology hilarious and mock it openly. Maybe I'm giving them too much credit.
also, i think they don't tell people the part about Aliens and Volcanoes and stuff immediately anymore.
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I did speak Japanese as my first language, but my family moved back to Alaska when I was three or so.
I would feel clever about guessing this but it's more than made up for by my lousy research on #1, not thinking to try to compare the birth years. Dang.
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the only Scientologist "church" in the US outside of LA is down the street from my school.
Also: #2 was the lie.
There's on in DC in the Dupont Circle area, also. I think so, anyway. It might be just an admisistrative building.
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If someone was related to Tom Cruise and everyone knew about it, that's pretty much an invitation to having everything you owned covered in grafitti that says "Xenu rules!" and "My uncle wants to pray the gay away!" and so on.
The world wants vengence on Tom Cruise but he lives on a zepplin battleship and travels by armed rickshaw... so most of us would have to settle for revenging ourselves upon his more accessable relations.
His cousin worked at my law school as the person who help graduates find jobs. He has a lot of family in Louisville.
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the only Scientologist "church" in the US outside of LA is down the street from my school.
Also: #2 was the lie.
Um, are you absolutely sure about that? (http://www.churchofscientology.com/scientology-us.htm) Sounds like someone needs some auditing to clear some engrams and implants.
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oh. huh.
I had heard that it was the only one. Maybe it was the first outside of LA? I don't know. Maybe I should go talk to them about all my problems. You know. As penance for being wrong.
Forgive me Father, for I have said a Thing about Scientology.
"very well my son, pay 10,000$ and you shall be forgiven. In the name of Hubbard and Tom and the Placenta he Ate, amen."
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I hate Tom Cruise, just hate him all to hell. Why doesn't he pick on diabetics for needing insulin?
Then he'd been horning in on PETA's turf. I think most of the insane beliefs out there were assigned to different groups back in the early 80's to avoid duplicate work. It was like a cross between a meeting of mafia dons and Vatican II.
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Then he'd been horning in on PETA's turf. I think most of the insane beliefs out there were assigned to different groups back in the early 80's to avoid duplicate work. It was like a cross between a meeting of mafia dons and Vatican II.
heh!! awesome. hell of tiny cans.
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And now... on topic:
Felix, I'm going to say #3 is the lie.
I still haven't answered this, have I? Actually, #3 is true, although to be fair it wasn't just a bar so much as it was an old 1920s movie palace converted into a bar/nightclub. I saw Soft Machine there once as well. It's a pretty happenin' place. I still have the beer mat somewhere or other, too.
Also, my house really did appear in Monty Python - in the Hungarian Phrasebook sketch, no less. It's on one of the streets the policeman runs down on his way to the tobacconist.
The lie was #2. I got off scot-free for booty dancing in Tiananmen Square.
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1. I was strip searched in Belgium.
2. I have slept in the same room with a Pulitzer Prize winner.
3. C-list celeb Hal Sparks' dad is a family friend.
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AW: I'm going with number 2 because it's detailed enough to be made up.
I wasn't quite clear on the rules so I'ma just throw three out there:
1) I have a bachelor of science with first class honours in chemistry and I work in a petrol station.
2) The left side of my left knee is totally numb.
3) I am missing one eyetooth and one wisdom tooth.
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1. I was strip searched in Belgium.
2. I have slept in the same room with a Pulitzer Prize winner.
3. C-list celeb Hal Sparks' dad is a family friend.
Hmmm...that's tough. I guess that number 1 is false.
AW: I'm going with number 2 because it's detailed enough to be made up.
I wasn't quite clear on the rules so I'ma just throw three out there:
1) I have a bachelor of science with first class honours in chemistry and I work in a petrol station.
2) The left side of my left knee is totally numb.
3) I am missing one eyetooth and one wisdom tooth.
Number 1 sounds like it's the lie.
Here are some more for me. I just woke up from a really long sleep and I had these terrible dreams. You know where you're in a dream and you have sleep-wake cycles IN THE DREAM so that it feels like you've been kidnapped for a week and your whole world has changed? Ugh, I hate those dreams. I still feel a little groggy.
1. I've never had general anesthesia.
2. My lowest adult BMI has been 17.5, the highest has been 32.
3. I still have all my wisdom teeth.
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1. I've never had general anesthesia.
2. My lowest adult BMI has been 17.5, the highest has been 32.
3. I still have all my wisdom teeth.
I'm guessing number 3.
Do I get a turn?
1. I've had a pint with Paul Simonon (bassist of the Clash)
2. My girlfriend is the youngest ever flautist to gain this like, really virtuoso award from the British Academy of Music.
3. At the age of 11 I scored higher on an intelligence test than any other my age in England.
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1.
It was Topper.
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Right you are! I had all four wisdom teeth removed when I was in my early twenties, without general anesthetic. I had a Valium and that was good enough.
Terry, I guess that #1 is the lie, simply because I want the others to be true.
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Right you are! I had all four wisdom teeth removed when I was in my early twenties, without general anesthetic. I had a Valium and that was good enough.
Terry, I guess that #1 is the lie, simply because I want the others to be true.
I guessed #2 for you, linnea, but it said I had already posted it.
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Hmmm...that's tough. I guess that number 1 is false.
Bzzzzt. The lie is number 2.
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Damn, Linnea got mine, but to be fair it has only been a lie since sunday.
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1.
It was Topper.
NERK. That one was right, though to be honest it was more a half-pint of Coke chat than a blokey full-on pint discussion. He was very agreeable.
#3 is the no-no. It was only in my county that I was top, which is much less of an achievement considering we're pretty much all descended from the same four people. Farmers, no less.
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2. My lowest adult BMI has been 17.5, the highest has been 32.
Sounds like you and your BMI have been on some... black adventures together. I don't know how this came to pass, but I can't imagine it was very pleasant. So: my sympathies, and I hope you're doing alright now.
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Sounds like you and your BMI have been on some... black adventures together. I don't know how this came to pass, but I can't imagine it was very pleasant. So: my sympathies, and I hope you're doing alright now.
Thanks. Basically I have learned that you have to be nice to your body, because where the fuck else are you going to live??
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Thanks. Basically I have learned that you have to be nice to your body, because where the fuck else are you going to live??
5' tall ***** with the strength of five gorillas?
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1.) I haven't read a book in months.
2.) I have been engaged, but never married.
3.) My parents were denied visas to Australia in the early 1970s because they thought my parents were an interracial couple (my mom is blonde-haired and blue-eyed and my dad is Sicilian with dark skin and wore his naturally curly dark hair in an Afro at the time).
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1.) I haven't read a book in months.
2.) I have been engaged, but never married.
3.) My parents were denied visas to Australia in the early 1970s because they thought my parents were an interracial couple (my mom is blonde-haired and blue-eyed and my dad is Sicilian with dark skin and wore his naturally curly dark hair in an Afro at the time).
I will guess at #2 being untrue. Can't say 3 because of the details. You seem to be pretty busy with work so 1 is pretty plausable. I'm familiar with the fact that when you're in a medicine-related field, there is not very much time to fit fiction into your schedule, so this will surprise me if it is the false one.
However there's plenty of time to spend on the internet, because that doesn't count, obviously.
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3.) My parents were denied visas to Australia in the early 1970s because they thought my parents were an interracial couple.
That's right, we don't care for that kind of shit 'round here.
Actually I'm going to call this one the lie just because I'm willing to bet you've changed the details.
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That's right, we don't care for that kind of shit 'round here.
Actually I'm going to call this one the lie just because I'm willing to bet you've changed the details.
Damn! My previous sneaky ways have foiled me...#3 is all true.
Actually the lie is #1. I've read a couple books, including an awesome one about Proust that kellichou got me.
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1. I was once a declared communist.
2. I'm in MENSA.
3. I write poems about economics.
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1. I was once a declared communist.
2. I'm in MENSA.
3. I write poems about economics.
I think these are all true, and the lie is that you changed the order.
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1. My B.A. is in Pure Mathematics
2. I lost my virginity at fourteen (It's alright, I wasn't using it for anything.)
3. I sang a sickeningly romantic duet with Lucy Liu's cousin.
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2. I'm in MENSA.
Although you don't seem to be lacking in the ego department, I can't buy that you have the deep narcissism required to pay for the privilege of saying you're smart.
1. My house has more computers than TVs
2. My Dad blew himself up in a gasoline explosion
3. I'm allergic to dogs and can only own poodles because they are hypoallergenic.
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1. I have had sexual action in an airport.
2. I have evaded police pursuit in a ford club wagon.
3. I was stillborn.
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1. I have had sexual action in an airport.
2. I have evaded police pursuit in a ford club wagon.
3. I was stillborn.
Gotta be 2.
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I can't buy that you have the deep narcissism required to pay for the privilege of saying you're smart.
Yeah. It is pretty much The Hunts move. Capital-letters AND italics.
It is the Joining A Frat of nerds.
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1. My B.A. is in Pure Mathematics
2. I lost my virginity at fourteen (It's alright, I wasn't using it for anything.)
3. I sang a sickeningly romantic duet with Lucy Liu's cousin.
Hmmmmmm....I bet that the lie is #1, and that your maths degree is in a different sort.
1. I have had sexual action in an airport.
2. I have evaded police pursuit in a ford club wagon.
3. I was stillborn.
Well, my twin kellichou was born blue and breech, but the doctors were able to revive her fully. However, a true stillbirth means that the baby is 100% dead. So I vote that #3 is a lie.
1. My house has more computers than TVs
2. My Dad blew himself up in a gasoline explosion
3. I'm allergic to dogs and can only own poodles because they are hypoallergenic.
Jaydub, it seems that you own a different sort of dog, but I can't be sure. You do seem like the sort of chap that would have more computers than TVs, so I think #1 is true.
However, I think that your Dad is still alive based on some of the posts you've made about him washing away hillsides after his 'tate surgery. So I think that #2 is the lie.
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Teatime - your lie is #1.
Jaydub - your lie is #2. It is relatively hard to make gasoline explode. It is more of a burning thing unless compressed or oxidized. (what?)
Fooker - your lie is #3.
arachnocapitalistoU - your lie is indeed #2. While you were once in MENSA you are no longer in MENSA because MENSA is a joke. An expensive and irritating joke filled with irritating people.
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I have sort of evaded the police, but not in my Econoline Club Wagon V8 AKA the Land Whale. I am sort of surprised that someone got this right away.
I like referring to how I was born as 'stillborn' because I emerged hanged by my own birthcord, cold and blue, but I guess in the interest of technical accuracy I will just say I was strangled at birth. It's equally dramatic.
As for the airport, it was awkward.
Teatime: I am going to buck the trend and call #3.
Jaydub: #1. Just because I can.
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If anyone's up for it:
1#: I was once handed a Chick Tract in the street, and the old man who gave me it told me I had a nice behind and leered. I was 14.
2#: I have covered myself in peanut butter, Iggy Pop style.
3#: My own mother had sex with David Bowie.
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I have sort of evaded the police, but not in my Econoline Club Wagon V8 AKA the Land Whale. I am sort of surprised that someone got this right away.
I like referring to how I was born as 'stillborn' because I emerged hanged by my own birthcord, cold and blue, but I guess in the interest of technical accuracy I will just say I was strangled at birth. It's equally dramatic.
As for the airport, it was awkward.
Teatime: I am going to buck the trend and call #3.
Jaydub: #1. Just because I can.
My twin was also caught in the cord and she was blue/cyanotic when she was born, but she was revived and made a full recovery. Strangled implies that you were dead. Stillbirth implies that you were dead. You were born blue as a result of getting caught in the umbilical cord, but the doctors were able to revive you.
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Linnea, we missed celebrating your third anniversary. It was two days ago. Happy anniversary!
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WHOA!!! Really? Damn. Awesome. Happy Third Anniversary to me, everyones.
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Dickslap - your lie is the peanutbutter lie. Youre too young to have been drunk enough to pull that off.
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WHOA!!! Really? Damn. Awesome. Happy Third Anniversary to me, everyones.
Pefume, marmite, and pegging for everybody!
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3. I'm allergic to dogs and can only own poodles because they are hypoallergenic.
On the pedantic reasoning that Bichon Frises and various terriers (among other dogs, I am sure) are also hypoallergenic, I say this is the lie. Number two is highly suspect, though.
1#: I was once handed a Chick Tract in the street, and the old man who gave me it told me I had a nice behind and leered. I was 14.
2#: I have covered myself in peanut butter, Iggy Pop style.
3#: My own mother had sex with David Bowie.
I will say number two because there is no way that the whatever act followed was worth the cost of that much peanut butter.
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I will say number two because there is no way that the whatever act followed was worth the cost of that much peanut butter.
In the name of dada, I say that about number 3.
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Oh, for the record, my intended major is indeed Pure Mathematics, but I will not attend college until Autumn. Mockery of my youth and inexperience can commence.
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Judy's must be #3 because even if it was true, it is probably not something you'd tell your kids until...
...you know what, forget that. If I banged Bowie, I'd probably have it painted on the side of my house.
So I'm going to say #1, because in my mind I usually don't imagine any creepy people in Britian.
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My twin was also caught in the cord and she was blue/cyanotic when she was born, but she was revived and made a full recovery. Strangled implies that you were dead. Stillbirth implies that you were dead. You were born blue as a result of getting caught in the umbilical cord, but the doctors were able to revive you.
You rob the joy from everything. :-\
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If anyone's up for it:
1#: I was once handed a Chick Tract in the street, and the old man who gave me it told me I had a nice behind and leered. I was 14.
2#: I have covered myself in peanut butter, Iggy Pop style.
3#: My own mother had sex with David Bowie.
2. Because I take the long shots. Also, you are a dog owner. I know how that and peanutbutter works. I have used the internet.
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Judy-- # 3 is the lie.
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Joy! I have finally hoodwinked most of you!
1. Truth: At the moment we have 4 computers (3 of which are laptops) and 2 TVs.
2. Truth: I guess technically they were more violent deflagrations than explosions per se. The first time he was on a Triumph motorcycle that had a bad carburetor and had been parked in a hot shed. On ignition, the gas in the air ignited. The shed was flattened, the bike was heavily damaged, but my dad was pretty much OK. The second time was when he was igniting a trash pile in a brick, backyard incinerator. That one gave him a premature receding hairline and a quick trip across the back yard. My mom saw the whole thing and was certain she'd become a widow. Burn ointment and band aids was all that was required though.
3. The Lie: Thank goodness. I've had some of the danderiest damn dogs, ever.
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Joy! I have finally hoodwinked most of you!
1. Truth: At the moment we have 4 computers (3 of which are laptops) and 2 TVs.
2. Truth: I guess technically they were more violent deflagrations than explosions per se. The first time he was on a Triumph motorcycle that had a bad carburetor and had been parked in a hot shed. On ignition, the gas in the air ignited. The shed was flattened, the bike was heavily damaged, but my dad was pretty much OK. The second time was when he was igniting a trash pile in a brick, backyard incinerator. That one gave him a premature receding hairline and a quick trip across the back yard. My mom saw the whole thing and was certain she'd become a widow. Burn ointment and band aids was all that was required though.
3. The Lie: Thank goodness. I've had some of the danderiest damn dogs, ever.
Sweet! I was right!
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3. I write poems about economics.
Can we be economics friends? Please?
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You are a dog owner.
You are right about this, but I don't want to know how.
Anyway, the lie was #1! RoboGod, can for you. To elaborate: #1 almost happened, but he complimented my face before leering.
I can't say much more, except that the events of #2 did not occur under the influence, and it was not a dog that licked off the peanut butter.
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Judy is something like five years younger than me but in life experience he is an old soul indeed.
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Judy, you've grown up so fast.
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Can we be economics friends? Please?
Of course. Economics is the word, lady.
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You are right about this, but I don't want to know how.
I watch you.
I watch you when you think it is safe to drink almost all of the orange juice but put the carton back in the 'fridge.
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I watch you.
I watch you when you think it is safe to drink almost all of the orange juice but put the carton back in the 'fridge.
It's Chris Elliot!
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It's Chris Elliot!
As a youngster, I met Chris Elliot in the food court of the Museum of Natural History.
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Fuck all you people!
"Yeah, when I was 15, Freddie Mercury lived in our basement for 6 months. I co-wrote Bohemian Rhapsody with him."
"I met David Lynch on a bus in Tulsa. We ended up going out to a bar and talking about lunch meat for two hours."
"Hung out with Dan Fouts at the rodeo once. He just showed up and sat down next to me and my mom. It was fun."
"I grew up with Maynard James Keenan. We used to play Boggle a lot."
I'm sick of it, people. No more.
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my friend David met Ira Glass... and... peed next to some other big NPR guy who I haven't heard of (ie, in a urinal).
I... I met Jane Goodall once? She told me to follow my dreams. (http://touamb.com/index.php/topic,3539.msg87450.html#msg87450)
My grandpa's colleague discovered Mononucleosis? my great-grandma was tight with Eva Peron?
I feel like there is someone awesome and famous and really cool who I have met, but, I don't know who it would possibly be.
Other than the guy who founded ESPN, as mentioned earlier.
PS my mom also sat next to the Dali Lama at a big formal dinner once. She said he seemed very nice.
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PS my mom also sat next to the Dali Lama at a big formal dinner once. She said he seemed very nice.
You'd basically have to though wouldn't you? Who the hell is going to believe that the Dalai Llama acted like a total dick all night, dominated the conversation by talking about his pets and then bogarted your breadroll?
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Wait, uh... crap. I feel so alone in having no weird brushes with celebrity, although apparently my dad was on Nixon's shitlist for a while in the '60's and '70's...
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Psssst, Nabu!
The other week I high fived Phillip Rivers after an eagle!
It was neat.
I know, I know. I'm going to the fuck you box on my own, ref!
Sooooooo . . . both Stan Humphries and Phil Rivers, eh? You know what? As harmic realignment, Ryan Leaf is going to marry into your family. I'd get more specific than that, but it would only end in tears.
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Sooooooo . . . both Stan Humphries and Phil Rivers, eh? You know what? As harmic realignment, Ryan Leaf is going to marry into your family. I'd get more specific than that, but it would only end in tears.
Gibbering Jebbus Beans and Rice that is as harsh a harsh thing a man can wish on another.
Originally that was Karmic, but I changed it to remove the capitalization. This way is even worse!
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I can't say much more, except that the events of #2 did not occur under the influence, and it was not a dog that licked off the peanut butter.
I'm pretty sure it's illegal for me to even read this sentence. Any minute now the thought police are going to break down my doors and arrest me for statutory perception of innuendo.
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So wait, what? Judy's mom fucked David Bowie? Does that mean...
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So wait, what? Judy's mom fucked David Bowie? Does that mean...
DUDE! Judy's real father owns a bank in England and Iman is Judy's real stepmom.
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1. Members of my family have vomited in the buildings which house two out of the three branches of our government.
2. My mother is currently attending my first choice of schools for my undergraduate degree (a school which rejected me)
3. I am allergic to cotton and chocolate, and have been hospitalized for both twice, but never anything else.
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I don't buy the cotton.
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I was going to guess #3 too, but the fact that you explicitly stated "never anything else" suggests that it might not be a trick after all.
I'm going with #1 and guessing they vomited in buildings housing all three branches of government.
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Bullshit on #3. You are all wearing Cotton Right Now. Even you, Rumjay. Id bet money on this.
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I'm going with 1 since it's the vaguest.... but is that just what you want me to think?
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1. My grandmother vomited on a tour of the White House, and I vomited all over a bench in the entry area of Congress. We have high hopes for the Supreme Court seeing some barf from my gene pool at some point.
2. My mom is getting her master's at Boston University, my top choice for undergrad (though thank god I didn't get in).
3. I am allergic to nothing. I have only been hospitalized once since birth, about a month ago, when a cyst on my ovary ruptured.
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BU seems to have a trend going on where people don't like it. My friend Sarah (http://www.flickr.com/photos/theinevitable/409486907/) is transferring from there, apparently Wombat transferred from there if I recall correctly... dang.
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BU seems to have a trend going on where people don't like it. My friend Sarah is transferring from there, apparently Wombat transferred from there if I recall correctly... dang.
My mom loves loves loves it. I think that it's because she's not a residential student, and she's just happy to be back in school.
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Graduate school is completely different from undergrad - it's hardly like you're going to the same school at all.
As an undergrad, yeah, I would say BU pretty much sucked. It is true that I had one of the single best classroom teachers in my whole life there, and that a big problem was that they didn't actually have an undergraduate degree in the field I wanted to major in. But I still feel pretty confident in steering people away from the place.
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I felt really bad. Because this really nice girl who was visiting my friend here said "oh, so, I'm going to BU next year!" And her friend said "isn't your friend Sarah there? they should meet up!"
and I had to really quickly try to come up with a reason for why she hates it that wouldn't sound bad. I don't remember what I said... probably something ineffective.
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3. I am allergic to nothing.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure a cotton allergy doesn't exist. If a person had a type 1 allergic reaction to cotton, they would pretty much have to live in a bubble to avoid any cotton. And if they didn't, they would either die or become desensitized pretty quickly, either way eliminating the allergy.
Back in grade school, if you brought in cupcakes for your birthday, you had to bring some non-chocolate ones because supposedly at least one girl I can remember was allergic to chocolate. Complete bullshit, I'm sure. What a shame her parents just lied to her like that, 'you're not allowed to eat chocolate.' They were total overbearing douchebags. Fuck those crap people.
I dunno if that was a thing anywhere else, where you brought treats to school on your birthday? I wonder if that flies anymore since the post-9/11 anthrax scare. Man, that was my favorite time, the post-9/11 anthrax scare. I saw this dirty cardboard box outside a closed-down Key Food covered with white powder and I knew, "we doin' this." Shame though, it's kind of less funny in retrospect.
I don't think terror alert levels existed at that point. Good thing: they would have had to invent a new color to accurately gauge that terror threat.
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my friend is allergic to chocolate. She won't die or anything, she just gets all bloated and stuff. It's really unfortunate.
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I assumed the cotton allergy thing was made up but then I googled it and found out it existed so it just semed crazy enough to be true.
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My friend Barbara (http://www.flickr.com/photos/pmcd9/441453966/) is allergic to Chocolate.
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1) In the 1970s, my father made (and subsequently lost) a fortune trafficking heroin throughout the Midwest.
2) I have never been in love.
3) I have never ranked better than 4th in a pie eating contest.
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1) In the 1970s, my father made (and subsequently lost) a fortune trafficking heroin throughout the Midwest.
2) I have never been in love.
3) I have never ranked better than 4th in a pie eating contest.
Hmmm...I think #3 is the lie. I bet you've won a pie eating contest.
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I'd like to see a contest eating pecan pies. I bet it would take hours.
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Everybody's been in love.
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I think #1 is the lie. Reverse-reverse psychology. It's too unbelievable to be true, so we'll naturally assume that it is.
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The lie is you. You are the lie. You stare at mirrors only to witness death in action and have never eaten a pie.
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I'm gonna go with number 3 because they don't keep track of who came in fourth place in a pie eating contest. The know who the winner is and maybe second place, but that's as far as they keep track.
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Paul knows a lot about pie eating contests.
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Paul knows a lot about pie eating contests.
No, never been to one actually.
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Paul knows a lot about pie eating contests.
is that a fat joke?
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With a sweeping, obvious and totally true statement, littlefallsmets wins the round. My heart is so full of love that I sometimes think it'll explode.
On the other hand, dad was a wild child (fortune earned) and ultimately a convicted felon (fortune lost). And though Paul is correct in his assessment of the vagaries of rankings in pie eating contests, I can tell you with certainty that I finished nearly last (out of something like ten participants) in the one such contest I ever entered based simply on the amount of pie left in front of me. It was a speed test and I underestimated the importance of water to break down each bite for faster swallowing. If I ever enter another one, I'm going to make sure that it's based on the amount of pie eaten rather than how fast a pie is eaten. I think I could kick some serious ass in a quantity battle.
Anyway, let's revive this thread. I love this game and it's the first time I've ever had the opportunity to play it in this format.
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This would make it LFM's turn, then.